Best Pageant Poems
God made the flowers
To compete with your beauty
But they always lose
Dragon saw an advertisement for a Beauty Pageant, He wanted in! No less!
It stated it was for the 1 to 5’s, so Dragon figured he fit right in. You guess?
When we got there: We were shocked! No Mom would let us in, at the door.
They were probably, just jealous, as they knew, they couldn’t win! Oh, boy!
After all, his makeup & blinged out bib overalls, were impressive, my friend!
But, we always get lots of paparazzi, and the organizer wanted some of them.
He allowed us in, anyway, Moms yea or Nay, or that’s what to us, he did say.
Now the ‘5 O’Clock News’ would present it, That was a 1st for them. A fact!
The little girls were loaded to bear: with make up, talent, and tons of *****.
But man their attitudes were awful… All about them! Who would a thunk?
Amazingly, that made Dragon, seem to fit right in! He had a Good chance!
Ever wonder, how they teach widdle babies the violin, how to sing, or dance?
Well, didn’t matter, for Dragon knows fire, so he put on a little Fire Dance.
Setting the stage afire, he stomped around putting it out. Well, it did look, HOT!
No one tripped him, any more, after the first one’s eyebrows, were singed off.
Finally, all got the same crowns, as the organizer: feared the mom’s, for sure!
Of course, Dragon got ‘Best of Show’, so the paparazzi wouldn’t decide to go.
This was quite an experience; I don’t want to repeat ever, or again, real soon.
Moms’ and kids were way too mean, when the cameras were off, I impugn!
But Dragon seemed oblivious to that… as he took his extra and final 3rd bow.
His mind was totally, in dreamland, for a week, or two, or Yeah, forever more.
Me, I came away with a better understanding, of the art of being, a stage Mom.
I suspect that Dragon had only wanted the bling of a crown, from the very start.
The Trophy became mine for the mantle, to display, after Dragon blinged it out!
So if chasing fame, just be careful, what you wish for… Dragon may be about!
Nature held a Beauty Pageant
Guess who was crowned a crest?
A flowery green meadow was the stage and rostrum
Watch who won the contest.
Well, the peacock from India was crowned beauty King
The bird of paradise from New Guinea became Beauty queen.
And last but not least was the Indian tiger, runner up
But care he for beauty that he might as well sup?
And what care any of them
for accolades, crown or cup?
Other contestants were the gorgeous leopards
and the flimsy beauteous butterflies
They'll be crowned
next time around.
For beauty tis rich in supplies.
But nature-lovers alone applauded the flamboyant winners
who gaily stood upon the flora
They did come out with 'flying colors'
Around them nature's beauty an aura.
Miss world bird of paradise yet unaware of her placing
The peacock endowed by God a crown
They might never know of this showcasing
At our staring, gawping, they might just frown!
Then there are those unsung unawarded yet perfect beauties
both among mortals and animals
who join no display contests nor pageants
yet are undeniably glamorous nonetheless
for beauty ain't exclusive
to önly beauty contestants.
A hush fell o'er the Little Kirk Presbyterian Congregation,
Anticipating the annual Sunday School Christmas presentation.
The solemn flock, (usually obsessed with predestination),
Relaxed in their pews to enjoy Jesus' birthday celebration!
For weeks, moms had fashioned halos, stars and angels' wings,
Also, beards, crowns and robes for the trio of royal kings.
Over and over, harried teachers rehearsed the little dears.
This promised to be the smoothest pageant production in years!
Alas, things didn't go as conceived from the very start!
Kids bawled for Mom and Dad while others forgot their part!
Tho' Cindy Lou could at times be quite the prima donna,
She was chosen to star in the role of Mary the Madonna.
Little angels hovered about, their wings all askew.
The shepherds milled about not knowing what to do.
Joseph toyed with the Jesus doll and it cried, "I want my mama!"
Causing parishioners to titter, detracting from the drama!
The pastor read the Christmas Story from the account in Luke.
The kids harmonized on "Away in the Manger", a propitious fluke!
They portrayed the Christmas Miracle, despite some serious flaws,
And for their efforts received a standing round of applause!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired (© All Rights Reserved)
Our community is holding a beauty pageant
Which is not that uncommon, right?
But the difference is, this pageant ain't for girls
Hang on, try to picture this sight
To be eligible to enter our little competition
You must be breathing just a tad
But here's a thing that's just a little bit different
To enter you must possess great abs!
Fortunately I'm blessed with a body to die for
So the others won't stand a chance
When it comes to the evening gown competition
So stunning, a sure winner at a glance
The thrill and excitement just boggles my mind
The big networks will all be there
David Letterman will likely interview the winner
You'll be famous and known everywhere
Right on schedule, the alarm clock goes off
Ending my thrilling little adventure
As I get up, yawn, and stagger past my mirror
I flash my pearly white dentures!
© Jack Ellison 2012
Gets up every morning
Puts her makeup on
Makes sure she looks perfect
Though everything is wrong
Stares into the mirror
Runs her fingers through her curls
Then she practices her plastic smile
Just like a pageant girl
Goes into the closet
Picks out her favorite dress
The one with yellow flowers
Always has to look her best
Puts on her shoes walks out the door
Steps out into the world
As she waves to all the passerbys
Just like a pageant girl
She's the great pretender
Like an actor on a stage
Puts on a grand performance
As she tries to hide her pain
They don't know the sadness
This ache within her soul
The hopelessness, the loneliness
She's hollow, never whole
But she does her best to mask it
She keeps it all inside
Hopes no-one has figured out
This masquerade's a lie
So she meets their expectations
Gives them what they want to see
A silly, vapid happy girl
Lighthearted, weightless, free
She deflects them with her sparkle
Her smile white as pearls
Bright and wide but empty
Just like a pageant girl.
Jack Culotta, Jr.
Is It Just a Beauty Pageant Answer?
World peace is a far-fetched idea in today’s world. Easy to say, hard to do.
But why can’t we work toward something that sounds good to me and you.
The question, though, is…What CAN we do…to make this world a peaceful one?
And to that, I say, erase from your brain the image of a knife, sword, or gun.
But not just that, we must also grab our No. 2 pencil.
And erase away all the other things that make evil a potential.
Rather, we must focus on things essential.
Things like faith, food, and family --- things residential.
The most important way to find world peace is to start with your. own. life.
For married women, start with your husband. For married men, look at your wife.
How can you love your children if you do not first love your spouse?
Because every act of peace in this world is learned in one’s. own. house.
My point, here, is family. Everything starts there.
Try it, if you so dare.
Because while it is “easy to say, hard to do,”
World peace does sound so good to me and you.
So, let us start working towards this moment’s spur,
And stop making “world peace” just a beauty pageant answer.
It was approved by the Session and duly recorded by the Clerk
That the youth would perform the Nativity Play at the Presbyterian Kirk.
'Twas further resolved that Sister Smythe, who had a proclivity
For curious creativity, would again manage this annual activity!
Venerable Sister Smythe had staged the event since time immemorial,
But, alas, could be quite testy and at times rather dictatorial!
Generations of kids had acted in this solemn yearly affair.
Now their kids suffered beneath her stern, withering glare!
Stage-struck moms maneuvered above and around each other,
Boosting their little darling for the role of The Holy Mother!
Sister Smythe made her selection after a grilling examination.
Alas, the little lass forgot her lines to Sister Smythe's consternation!
The lad playing Joseph was found asleep and missed his cue.
Two of the Wise Men tripped and sprawled, spoiling their debut!
Kids dressed as sheep sounded like braying mules from sounds they did emit.
This caused the harried Sister Smythe another thundering snit!
Poor Sister Smythe lay abed a couple of weeks to recover,
As solicitous Session members around her did pray and hover.
Despite the vexations, she'll rule again next year - she'll survive,
To shepherd other kids to make the Christmas Story come alive!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(© All Rights Reserved)
such heretics pitched headlong
into fiendish frothing furnace
forcing obeisance toward primitive popular
identified, honored, glorified father figure
expressing devotion re:
decking the halls of the mountain king,
whence boughs of Juniper sprigs contriving wreaths
sanctifying twisted brambles via springling angel dust
(actually cremated remains of malefactors
stripped of habiliments) during bleak winter
unwittingly interweaving nascent (futuristic)
formally codified bona fied religions
unknowingly, tacitly, silently rendering
quintessential premises obliging
layperson to foreswear locally rooted secular treatises
trounced, trumpeted unction voided
wishy washy antithetical blind faith coalescing edicts
over course of time became established
Greco-Roman imposed group think
disallowing cynics,
diametrically emerging fanatics, skeptics
who (if he/she did not recant
recalcitrant reccommended recourse
faced torture amidst throng of madding crowd
as entertainment and forewarning gall
asper those who held steadfast dissimilar views
taught since birth, when citizenry reared
as just a little drummer boy/ girl pipsqueak
taught to stay the course (sans straight and true)
bound without freedom to express contrary aspects
of ways and whyfores, which controlled each green day
and silent night, wherefore unimaginable ogres
lined straying hip cats
eventually ensnared within warpath,
whence law of the land lend scimitar to smite
any mortal man, woman or child with flaming torches
licking the heretical body electric,
while defiant individuals
left to burn into decimated
charcoal blackened, ashen corpse.
Upon our stage we romp and rage
in Goldilocks’s golden cage
amongst colossal cosmic crowd
with spark of liveliness endowed
of pomp and circumstantial fate,
whose worth we underestimate,
in constant discontentment caught
‘and sicklied o’er in cast of thought
so enterprises turn awry’,
with not an inkling as to why.
Oh actors in this earthly scene,
what do your frantic antics mean?
‘The heartaches and the thousand shocks
that flesh is heir to’ come in flocks,
while nature tenders wherewithal
if we but list her earnest call
in lieu of inner outer din
that sends the senses in a spin.
Our little lives today may throng
‘this insubstantial pageant’ long
(to borrow varied Shakespeare tropes),
where humans share despair and hopes
on greater globe of bonny blue—
oh rarest planetary hue!
And yet when all ‘our revels end’
this world will leave a stardust blend
behind, ‘to still a beating mind’
of poet bards midst humankind,
a ‘rack’, or wisp of cloud, as told
in Prospero’s discourse of old;
for sun shall take its final breaths,
as dramatized in stellar deaths,
to be a nebula newborn
celestial heavens to adorn
in evermore creation’s dawn—
yea ‘such stuff as dreams are made on’…
~ Harley White
* * * * * * * * *
Some sources of inspiration were the following…
William Shakespeare (1564-1616) ~ From ‘The Tempest’, Act 4 Scene 1…
William Shakespeare’s play ‘Hamlet’, Act 3, Scene 1…
Pageant Girl
She’s as pretty as a picture, she is.
Her Mother was in the biz.
She’s bubbly,
that girl has super fashion fizz!
Her hair has flare,
her curves bounce without a care,
as she struts by, people stare.
She wants to leave, but she’d never dare.
Her Mother pumps her with speed,
she’s taught her to throw-up using
a long pine needle or a crooked leaf.
That girl’s a model;
she looks damn good in a golden sheath.
But she’s as dumb as they run,
marrying a rich man and making him moan
is the only way her adult game will be won.
Poor dumb
Pageant Girl!
Panoply of mystical elements of holly day style
breathe prez sense frostily exaled aired
per millennia athwart
(this terrestrial spaceship planet Earth)
two plus seventeen carousel rides resonated
veritable pantheon of pagan rituals
and quirky superstitions lit
(akin to a lit Christmass tree)
starry eyed imagination
as catalyst viz *****Sapiens
furrowed stern brow of forehead
aft stemmed whilst Santa oft puzzling
(allocating suitable gifts)
inducing him to tug thought generating beard
pondering, whence agents provocateurs
receive just desserts
fueled hodge podge, mished mashed, helter skelter
eclectic December twenty fifth
encompassing tens of thousands previous generations
bred despacito fixtures via paganism,
Manicheaism, Jainism, et cetera
ancient brutish credos, ethos, faiths
brewed nebulous concoction
within mindset of early mankind
loose confection, confederation, conglomeration
indiscriminately torquing, vetting, whetting
disparate constituent beliefs
contagion wrought spirit paradigm
inculcating oral tradition Madonna and child
occupying high chair
whereat superstitions birthed patchwork
comprising divergent ensemble heralding
tender petsmart impact, where world wide web populated
with sacrificial pacification sans deity
via oblation, immolation, flagellation appeasing Dominatrix
borrow wing, vis a vis amalgamated viz Roman sol invictus
wrought fiery brimstone tempting those who dared
assert contrary fledgling jambalaya outlook
provoking regally supreme sacerdotal wiseman
punishing opposing incorporating
novel modus operandi explaining sacrilegious worship
Our community is organizing a beauty pageant
That's doesn't seem uncommon, right?
The difference is, this pageant ain't for girls
Hang on now, this might give you a fright!
To be eligible to enter our competition
You must be breathing if only a tad
But one thing that's really different from others
You must be male and possess great abs!
Fortunately I'm blessed with a body to die for
So the others don't stand a chance
When it comes to the evening gown competition
So stunning, all will know at a glance
The thrill and excitement just boggles the mind
The big networks will surely all be there
David Letterman will interview the winner
People will be coming from everywhere
Right on schedule, the alarm clock goes off
Putting an end to my silly adventure
As I get up and stagger over to the mirror
I flash my pearly white dentures!
©Jack Ellison 2012
After the carols and the pageant
of the birth, we walk through the night
of Lexington to Suzanne and Fran’s.
The streets are darker since a giant
oak gave up the ghost and downed the lights.
The colored bulbs at the Phi Gams’,
still burning, though the brothers went
a week ago, wouldn’t guide us back except
we already know the necessary turns
and window candles on McDowell
cast their welcoming glow into the night.
Then, as Enid taught us, we hold hands
and from our circle of Quaker grace
send silent wishes from our inner light
to all our friends beyond this place
Written ~ December
two thousand seventeen
in case ye dear reader possess
an eye extremely keen
nonetheless just by happenstance
courtesy this human bean
counter, who also happens
tubby garden variety alien.
Panoply of mystical elements of holly day style
breathe prez sense frostily exhaled aired
per millennia athwart
(this terrestrial spaceship planet Earth)
two plus seventeen carousel rides resonated
veritable pantheon of pagan rituals
and quirky superstitions lit
(akin to a lit Christmas tree)
starry eyed imagination
as catalyst viz *****Sapiens
furrowed stern brow of forehead
aft stemmed whilst Santa oft puzzling
(allocating suitable gifts)
inducing him to tug thought generating beard
pondering, whence agents provocateurs
receive just desserts
fueled hodge podge, mish mashed, helter skelter
eclectic December twenty fifth
encompassing tens of thousands previous generations
bred despacito fixtures via paganism,
Manichaeism, Jainism, et cetera
ancient brutish credos, ethos, faiths
brewed nebulous concoction
within mindset of early mankind
loose confection, confederation, conglomeration
indiscriminately torquing, vetting, whetting
disparate constituent beliefs
contagion wrought spirit paradigm
inculcating oral tradition Madonna and child
occupying high chair
whereat superstitions birthed patchwork
comprising divergent ensemble heralding