Best Numbskull Poems
A polytheist would argue
just one God
That there are endless guards
and many rods
given these wards
With many temperaments and aims
devotion for a supreme being
Compassionate gods spread
charity, clarity’s
light and goodwill
Whereas others spread hate,
blood still spills
Relates—mayhem and darkness
The God of the Old Testament
unforsaken is the nakedness
not ever to turn the other cheek
not even for the meek
He portrays Himself
Jealous and wrathful
vengeful, rageful
Numbskull—beware!
Whilst man plays by the rules
these judges will decide
The winner takes it all
The loser has to fall
No complaints, apologies
Whilst the God of New Testament
demonstrates much mercy,
forgiveness you shall see
For God and his creations
This is what’s in common
in the world religions
This is the core,
the common essence
all shared values
when in His presence
The road is long, painful and circuitous
A troubled past will plague us
dubious religious sects, false replay,
vulnerable man is their prey
Realization from my deepest self I reveal
enamored in love is how I truly feel
I felt with all things,
a strong sense of collectiveness
An emotional rapture
of the combined sacred oneness
One man showed us love
A true love He
displayed,
flogged, died
Crucified for love
of mankind
The Jewel of Jesus
Find a man like Him
and certainly not a moony (woman)
In Ganges River, I shall swim
in blessed holy water
I’ll bathe in
His wine I’ll drink
On my knees I shall sink
Bow down and pray
for Yahwe’s precious Jewel
the One, the Only
Eyes of blue?
Jesus Christ Superstar
Categories:
numbskull, jesus, religion,
Form:
Dramatic Verse
The clouds, the first at dawn, ripened, pregnant,
With sunrise, and wet, dissolved, gathered,
Evolved and became, blankets, tarred black;
Feathery rain, hammered, dropped and spat,
Cast out, of the womb, of heaven; the trident,
Electricity, crackled, white, forked the earthen
Vagina; splitting trees, their penile trunks, charred
With tongues of flame; gnarled bark, ablaze,
When from a bough, hung, fruit, the strangest
Fruit you’ve ever seen; untouched by flame, black
Just the same; noose neck crooked, sightless
Crow-pecked sockets, purple tongue torn,
Ravaged; hands hemp-bound, dripped with rain;
Carcass left to rot, decay, pendulously sway,
Morbid compass, warns others who would rise,
Speak, dare suggest, they have human rights.
Strange fruit, indeed, yet stranger still the
Bone orchard spooks, supremacists, bigots,
Who put the fruit on the bough; retards, dumb,
Blinded; nothing is achieved by ignorance,
Terrorism, superstition, stupidity – just self-fulfilling
Prophecies and a long, hard day’s dying, for those
Of such morally rank, necrotic persuasion.
By such hands, progress falters, cosmically trips,
Slips on galactic banana peel; and people, innocents,
As ever, are needlessly done to death in
The redneck night of each numbskull day.
Categories:
numbskull, history, sad, social,
Form:
Blank verse
WD-40 resistant, cranky
mental gears no longer appraised,
honored, nor prized
as a precision crafted tool
never adequately utilized,
when eyes stared blankly
taking up space and
time (sigh hence) during
during twelve years
of public school
passively mute as a general rule
ambivalent, whether I sank or swam
during physical education
time in the pool
evincing being in
somnambulant state giving
top notch 40 ache curs and a mule
a run for his/her money,
plus also outwitting
any motley fool
nonetheless garnering huzzahs
if challenged to silent duel
despite implacable blackened
barbs didst unspool
assaulting me though
vicious and cruel
fast forward to
Matthew Scott Harris
at this present age
once feigned numbskull,
now deeply rutted,
pockmarked, cratered, asper
useful as fist size asteroid,
which post mortem will
not surprisingly, definitively,
and conclusively gauge
imagine dissecting my
fifty plus shades
of gray matter
revealing analogously glommed
together one severely
gunked up bacteriophage,
where once upon a time,
when a newborn babe
feeling warmth mother's chest,
she long since
passed away forced guest
to attend masquerade
hosted by grim reaper,
a most nefarious,
obnoxious, and pernicious pest
intricately, handsomely, genetically
her cremated remains
freed to the four corners
of the globe quest
inert particles integrated
within biosphere, she remains
perpetually in motion,
and never at rest
within infinite void
nonetheless...the spirit
of (the late) Harriet Harris
passed the electric
acid kool aid test,
and thus continues
to sprinkle the world
wide web with zest.
Categories:
numbskull, death, dream, fire, leaving,
Form:
Bio
I am applying for the consultant position
of Office Manager for which I will audition.
I am undeniably qualified to deal with nitwits
and idiots I will immediately classify as 'twits.'
My solution to deal with those people is fair
It may not be righteous, but I don't care.
If your company is greedy to make money,
it's ok with me. Just give me my check, honey.
I don't browbeat employees with a big stick
when they come in late or say they're sick
I'll crack the whip on any numbskull at work
and there's one less lazy fool I'll call a jerk.
If you think my method is severe over kill,
you're right, because I don't show good will
to jackasses who keep making me mutter
words you would only hear in a street gutter.
I'll get control and do what needs to be done
and I promise I'll try not to pull out a real gun.
I'll need some handcuffs and maybe a jail cell.
Give me free rein and everything will be swell.
My resume' experience speaks for itself.
Once, I've even fired an Elf on the Shelf
I did it without a good reason or just cause
so you can waiver that harrassment clause.
You can hire me now for a trial run.
Keep me on or fire me, but I'm the one
you need to give brainless creatures the boot...
not due to my work ethic, cuz I don't give a hoot.
Categories:
numbskull, business,
Form:
Rhyme
This sonnet was written after reading a news article on the internet about the Swedish
Wrestler Ara Abrahamian's misconduct at the awards presentation after failing to win the
gold medal at the 2008 Beijing Olympics. He was awarded the bronze medal for his
performance. He took the bronze from around his neck during the medal ceremony, stepped
from the podium and dropped it in the middle of the wrestling mat and then walked off.
Fate is chance, destiny is choice. Swedish
Wrestler Ara Abrahamian chose
The latter. He should have been admonished
For his bitter behavior that arose
Shortly after medals presentations.
Character lacked more than his wrestling holds
claiming it was politicization.
The arrogance of him! "I wanted gold"
saying, "I don't care about this medal."
His disgrace was his choice, we all heard that
of course. More importantly, this numbskull
audaciously dropped his bronze on the mat
sealing both his fate and his destiny:
infamy, obscurity guaranteed.
* August 16, 2008, 12:09 PM the International Olympic Committee finally reprimanded
Abrahamian.They stripped him of his medal.
Categories:
numbskull,
Form:
Sonnet
Fiery Aghori
told us his story,
invoking seance,
to see spirits dance.
He knows all is one
but deeds to be done
in darkness of night,
require we shed fright.
Spirits aid his cause,
seeking no applause,
for there’s no one here,
save bliss beats that spear.
Love drenched empathy,
by telepathy
infuses intent,
as divine current.
Thus cause and effect,
sans ego defect,
is set in motion
without commotion.
Though he’s eccentric,
love pulse concentric,
as ripples in space,
echo but God’s grace.
He is no numbskull,
yet drinks from a skull,
mocking death itself,
for soul’s his true Self.
Ostracise him not,
for he is self-taught,
unlike most of us,
who dark fears nonplus.
Spirits that appear,
too to God are dear
and the Aghori,
whose ways seem gory.
21-July-2022
Notes: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aghori
Categories:
numbskull, spiritual,
Form:
Jueju
Very well, my dear, she said through coloured glass,
Through teeth of blood and silver
As the doorway hurtled past;
I then stood on the front step, with the rain beating down,
Until he bared his thuggish fangs
And I drove from the town.
I had done no wrong, offended none, and yet
He bore a numbskull grudge
In rage and beery sweat;
Each escalating threat of unfinished business spoke,
Of coming round and knocking
Things grew way beyond a joke.
My aging failing heart began to age and fail anew,
The sickness quickly spread
With blood work left to do;
Though of innocence protested, all stupidity is deaf,
Only one track on his mind:
To batter me to death.
Categories:
numbskull, confusion, death, life,
Form:
Verse
Awakening From Pleasant Dreams...
No matter scant details recalled upon
arising from slumber, this even though
submerged into deep unconscious - (as
ifmine being plunged bajillion miles
subterranean catacombs) thoroughly
saturated with inaccessible facets of my
person then Poof – like a magic dragon!
Every last detail vanishes without a trace,
whence each eyelid slowly opens (never
jarred out sleep) - only my own Circadian
clock determines when (no idea how) body
electric (temporary property of mortal
christened Matthew Scott Harris) returns
yours truly to state of consciousness, or
thee closest approximation thereof, where
by sense and sense and sensibility minus
pride and prejudice immediately severed,
no longer linked tin (analogous to Internet
Error Code 404 - page not found) finds me
straining with might of Hercules - all in vain,
yet lingering drowsiness (torpor still main
training strong toehold) dissipates ever so
slowly, thus rendering ability impossible to
cogitate - quite helpful when reading or write
ting, and when cerebral clarity becomes
manifest...nary a whisper recollected, when
mean drama exploded within pitted cranial
fifty plus shades of gray matter parameters
suddenly vibrant rattletrap quiescence, a
proxy armistice snatching at lightspeed any
recollection rendering sleepyhead (non talking)
befuddled, confused, dazed... numbskull pre
vented (even with proper clearance) access to
top secrete, potential mutinous, juicy fruit
confidential data, which necessitates one
bushy eyed and bright tailed primate to scratch
his noggin with futility although well rested
fitful without ways nor means to dredge up
sunken treasures briefly uncovered during
stretch of time hide nave hoar did blink, none
zee less..., an enjoyable shuteye state of being -
allowing, enabling, and providing short lived
respite bearing down as if trying to shrug off atlas!
Categories:
numbskull, 12th grade, angel, blessing,
Form:
Free verse
This fool doth not consider himself wise,
writing paltry poetry difficult
to read and/or actualize
methinks perusers of great literature
snub nose how I miserably advertise,
laughable attempt to aerobicise
fifty plus shades of gray matter
lobbying showy words agonize
zing effort perhaps best to cauterize
near petrified glob - boon
for scientists to analyze
baffling laboratory technicians
unusual crenulations
a profound surprise
pitiful peremptorily doth apologize
unlike verbalization feasible
after webbed whirled fist size
terra incognita reveals numbskull years
wrought yours truly to anesthetize
smelting, squelching,
and suppressing emotions
scored how tree rings annualize
environmental conditions definite
premature imp of the pervert
poe fella lifetime channels,
where bullies did antagonize
upon death requested autopsy authorize
zing eager scalpels to apprize
miniature dried river bed
formerly streams of consciousness
lake never seen before engendering
crowdsource to hypothesize
baffling every expert,
how terrible fate did baptize
ala lemony snicket series
of unfortunate events
multiplied power bajillion times
number only Google could surmise
obvious tell tale signs did brutalize
as if smacked upside the head
one unfortunate gladly apparently
suffered maelstroms of armageddon size
poet chars evidently
succeeded to burglarize
more successful than Watergate
psychological ploys hackers
noninvasively did cannibalize
(perhaps bored furloughed
government employees)
albeit noninvasively deeming
imposible to canonize
resultant cerebral corpus
understandably did capsize
entire body politik (Democrat)
faced, booked on hatred did demonize
verbal assaults indicate
suffering did caramelize
cerebrum, cerebellum and brainstem
resembling burnt offering
impossible to categorize
glommed hardened integument colleagues
hard pressed to characterize
highly rendered anomaly,
hence unfair to criticize
erratic schizoid personality disorder
quite evident amyloid plaques
did significantly crystalize
definitely explain aberrant quirks
resultant incessant emasculation
unquestionably led him to demoralize.
Categories:
numbskull, absence, anti bullying, atheist,
Form:
Free verse
Visit to Manicurist Taken by a Tourist
There are so many things that I must endure
But oh no not another numbskull manicure
Including not only fingers but all of my toes
And then longer everyday each nail grows.
Could they actually color nails of a man?
And have feet soaked in a portable pan
While your wife ends up in state of denial
Until all my nails they finally start to file.
Are handsome and beautiful both related?
If so, why by God were we all procreated
When all that I wanted was peace of mind
Plush color to nails be permanently assigned.
James Thomas Horn, Retired Veteran and Poet
Categories:
numbskull, hilarious, humorous,
Form:
Couplet
The numbskull brigade was in town making us feel intimidated.
Running over manuscripts over which we had been elated.
Our tender feelings were hurt, they did not like our wording at all.
And they were mean and blustery, and about sixteen hands tall.
You make publishing impossible, we little writers screamed.
They laughed at us and threw us into triple cake all creamed.
We came out loving the frosting, which made us feel better.
Here's our advice they said. Try first to write a letter.
Categories:
numbskull, write, writing,
Form:
Rhyme
Towers, new or old,
Stay grounded, slim or fat,
Draped bright or in mold,
Wearing hats, fancy or plain flat,
For some masquerade never to end.
Towers, tall or short,
Gaze below, gleefully or brooding,
Around their feet, mobility like in field of sport,
low humming in parking lots and malls, intruding,
Upon the silence of a peaceful sunset.
Towers, lively or dull,
Bear the midday sun drilling their wrinkles,
Sulking morbidly like some numbskull.
One day older, by the time a star twinkles.
Urban life drenched in various colours from dawn to dusk.
(Written in a parking lot of an urban center, while waiting for my son to finish work)
Categories:
numbskull, color, conflict, creation,
Form:
Rhyme
Dad was forever in a hurry
His life filled with tension and worry
He always had to be right on time
If not, he preferred ten minutes early
A terror behind the wheel of his car
He cursed at Heaven and the stars
He'd ride the tail of a slowpoke
Here are names that he'd invoke
You moron, you idiot, you jerk!
You're making me late for work
Nincompoop, numbskull, and pea-brain
You're slower than a worn-out freight train
Dad, of course, was 100% right
And always ready for a fight
'Til the day this came out from my little brother
~ 'That moron drives like my friggin grandmother!'
Categories:
numbskull, analogy, anger, child, dad,
Form:
Light Verse
I broke my thumb
What a numbskull
How dumb is that?
11-26-2020
Than-Bauk Me
Sponsor: Charlie Messina
Categories:
numbskull, silly,
Form:
Than-Bauk
Alas ample alliteration available?!
True (terrific) title: Trump's truckling tutored troopers...;
wily word wizard worried,
where world wide web wickedly wends.
Triumphantly tenaciously (try to) trample treacly
traffickers target timid testifiers traducing,
their traitorous tractable toxic troglodyte:
today transition toward
totalitarianism tidily trends.
Quasimoto (querulously) queries, quivers, quakes:
queasiness quotient quarantine quelled qualm;
qua quacking quaffing quota quips:
quicksand quits quagmire quashing:
quintessential quarrelsome;
quintillionth queued questioner.
Numbskull noodles notorious nonsense:
nincompoop netizen nimbly navigates;
nowadays nauseating news necessitates
nameless nervous negativistic nattering nabob;
Nome nomad nudges, numerates,
nurtures... narcolepsy.
Knowledgeable knave; kindhearted
keen, kooky kvetching king kibitzer;
kindles kickass kinskip (kaffeeklatsch);
kneading Keats kinfolk karma.
His highness, herewith hooligan;
helpmate hermit hamstrung Harmit Harms;
humiliating, harried, ho hum humorous hokum;
habitual half hearted hookers happily hollow;
hallelujah!
Exceptional exertion earnest endeavor exercising
especial expending energy excluding essential/
exact entities even everyday eminent eccentric
experienced exhaustion - epilogue.
Categories:
numbskull, 10th grade, 11th grade,
Form:
Alliteration