Best Nonagenarian Poems

My uncle's got a tiny winky
I'm telling you its truly dinky
So he gulps down blue pills
Which result in big thrills
Poor auntie says he's turned quite kinky!

Now auntie wears a basque and lace thong
From flaccid soon his todger grows long
No quick roll in the hay
They're like...

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Today I'm celebratin' my final day as an Octogenarian.

Tomorrow I'll join the Fraternity of The Nonagenarian!

The decades have passed so fleet but its been one helluva ride,

And somehow I've managed to survive and taken it all in stride!

Now, 'tis my earnest goal to become a...

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Pat the Nonagenarian
No one would guess Pat was over ninety
She'd had pins and tucks, is trim and lively 
With implanted bust
Inflated buttocks
She drives men crazy, undeniably.

That is till they get her into the sack
Pat can't raise a smile as her face would crack
Her buttocks and...

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Vitriolic scathing psychological malevolent jujitsu
cruelly, fiendishly, incriminating
lambasting opprobrium rue
teenly dished out to yours truly

mechanically engineered hatred to stew
when passive aggression fostered corked,
where self destruction grew
tens of decades ago, when this then
much younger match chew

Scott doubted, hesitated, lollygagged...,
where in solitary confinement he brew
toxic shocking rancor towards...

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Nirvana awaits dada dear
thine paternal parent,
who helped sire yours truly,
a widower these
last fourteen plus years,
he laments absence,

and sorely misses presence
regarding scatterbrain spouse,
single word description,
he would readily concur
appellation linkedin with
bubbly headed just legal bride

born November thirteenth
ninety thirty five
learned thru the grapevine
(I must telephone him...
before the curtain...

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