Best Kilometre Poems

FEEDING  HORSES


She was four years old
Apples in bulging pockets from garden trees
Cold day in autumn
Stroll down to Paddy Sands’s horse pasture


Stop at five-bar gate and lift her up
Call or whistle - they come from a half-kilometre
Black, brown mares, one gelding
Jealous one tries to bite...

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When ten minus nine equals eight the baked bean has a chat to a nine foot goblin in an underpass who is carrying sixty-seven bowls of custard to make a very large tart for supper. An instigator is neither an alligator nor a flea. And...

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Unquotable quotes: Olympic Antics – XXXIII

Why do Judo-kas bother to wear anything at all since all they do is to try their very best to undress one another before hugging themselves on the mat?
Wrestlers at least take up perverse **** positions right from the start.
Besides,...

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what
A multitude of dishes is just not a sanctuary of fishes. Ok? Did you hear the trinkling of the water omitting from the tap? Gaps are small and small is smell and smell is stagnantly sipping stoic spit. Judge not a golden orb of a...

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As I was in national park virunga
 and I saw a zebra 
which was giving birth and
one black and white cobra 
passed by there.
 I admired their colours 
and took some pictures 
to show my kids about the adventures 
in DRCongo parks. 
Next day , I...

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A back flipping coconut is very very amusing at a ball but ball pits are moving around so one must surely wear wellingtons or a pair of anglers' waders when jumping across such multicoloured curves. Harp no more sang to a lute at a castle....

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Pamela Relph wanted to join the army, the Royal Engineers, 
Because she was funded by them for sixth form fun arrears, 
But she got arthritis just when she was eighteen and keen, 
And so undertook a BSc at Birmingham in physics, mean. 

In 2011 she...

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Grass


A Man of discernment the grass he gazes
With invariable appetite as a cow that grazes;
Grass in plains meanders with admiration,
And up the hills in its converse undulation-
He’s green, not with envy, but admiration!

The Idiot who laid a carpet, forgetting grass
His mind is dowdy and his...

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Rabbits at junctions are often akin to moons at traffic lights. A light lunch is preferable to a whisky scone when taking a picnic to a lake. But playlists can play so font argue with a flamed fortress of fig. Tailoring a suit for a...

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A white dossier is neither a manual for a pilot on a pivotal stand nor a baking tray waiting for butter. Criss cross ducking on an angled penned out sketch. Drawing a ruin is not a clever idea for ruins are raving and raving is...

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Dominions' in keyboards are placid occupants in a bracket brace. But a bracelet is an undeniable part of an observation of arm. And the armies of the finger caps will ride ride ride. Whipping an atmosphere into atmospheric pressure. Weaving a salted sugary sweet into...

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A bin in a sin is a din a Zen. But a booming bongo basket could always equate to a left hooked right winged shark. Oh gosh it's dark.. Oh dear. Oh no. A cracked out fish on a display. Er. Even the wildest foot...

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It was a bright cold sunny morning
The mist lifted without warning
As we walked through the cemetery gate
It had been nearly a hundred years wait

Outside of the Ieper Menin Gate
We had come to honour you, mate
About a kilometre down the Menin road
You marched this way with...

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Rigorous sphincter ani externus muscle workout

Amidst the rubble strewn landscape ruins
courtesy healthy helping of prunes
linkedin to derrière issuing
melodious flatulence classical tunes,
yours truly renown buttuck blaster,
possesses wide ranging repertoire
ofttimes employed
as poignant powerful score
within battlefield documentaries
trademark trumpeting tush
indistinguishable from authentic
soundcloud moaning mortal wounds.

Far and wide taketh me
courtesy...

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