Best Hes Poems

I feel terribly sorry for Rodger
He developed a kink in his todger
It looked such a sight
when bent to the right
that his poor wife ran off with the lodger! 

When his wife ran away from poor Rodger
Because of the shape of his todger
He cried and he...

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He looks so tall as he stares down at me
But i don't care cause he loves me for it
He lights my day with his voice
Oh how he says my name 
It sounds so velvety and sweet for i could never share
He lights my day up...

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What they call the big bang theory
We call it a “God flicking his fingers” story

What they call evolutionary
We call it a moment of “let there be”

What they call *****sapiens
We call it his likeness

What they call abundance and riches
We call the gifts of his blessings

What...

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When fate clashes
With destiny or
Your illusions
Clamors with reality
If hope and dreams
Are saboteurs
Then what happens to
Your future;
If in this life, you
Cannot face the
Challenges that
Appear and 
You live inside
Your head,
Huddled up in fear
In your own little 
World of illusions
Where you get treated
Greatly.
You have become a
King inside
Your world...

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Saunters along, nonchalance 
Dimpled craggy chin, cracks a wrinkled grin
eye slits that see beneath, within
casino cards, in his jacket coat
his past,  a lot said and wrote
whiskey drinks, smoke filled rooms
pallid, dubious men, the mark, fate looms
poker face that smile beguiles
“Frank the Devils Croupier”
deft hands,...

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Mrs. Claus in the bedroom with sauce.
The bearded wonder thinks he’s the boss,
but the beat of her drums
as she wiggles her bum
makes him lose all his pride in the toss.

12/15/2021
I Need a Good Laugh: XMAS LIMERICK CONTEST
Sponsor: Andrea Dietrich...

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(Apologies for the asterisk overriding PC gone wrong)

One sister, one brother, one who’s something other
We haven’t worked out what he’s turned out to be
Stilettos and braces and tattoos in places
That shouldn’t be seen in polite company

And if you try to tie him down he’ll say...

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He ain’t prickly, he’s my brother I said.
Full of quills though, right? Asked my neighbor Fred
Not awful, tolerable actually, cushy even,
This was thrown in by my best friend Steven.

You mean you ride on his back? A little one queried.
Yes I said, and I am not...

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found one that does what i wish you would do
but he's not you
he tell me all those things a good man is suppose to

and does a damn good job of keeping me satisfied and secure too
but you know what, hes not you

i cant compare him...

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Back in the,
I always had a smile on my face,
But it done faded away,
When he died,
That took my life,
He was the reason I breathe,
The most important thing in life to me,
Man I miss my daddy,
It was always me and him it was just us,
If we...

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Old Olfa’s an expert at yoga
and viewed as a bit of an ogre
When gals see him rise
They get a surprise
He’s naked beneath his white toga!

09/30/20...

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MY ELOHIM FATHER BESIDE ME, - HE'S ALSO INSIDE ME
I am not alone, Jesus my Savior inside me
I am not alone, My Elohim Father beside me
I am not a clone, yet I know that I am Loved
By the heavenly Father, ALWAYS
I am not alone, My...

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Have you ever been so close to God?
You could feel Him;
He’s just there, He’s just here;
Have you ever been so close to God?
You could taste Him shallow in the spirit;
He’s here
He’s here
Open up your mouth
Open up your hearts He’s real, so real;

He’s here
He’s here
Open up...

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 off the wall dancing
electric blue shoes awhirl
one-armed pushup

11/5/2020...

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HES MY JESUS-And I love HIM---  -REMIX-


He's my Jesus, and I love Him;
Nobody else;
Who, Can pick me up, up 
above the waters;
And turn me around;

I've been lost, but now I'm found;
Newly converted child of God;
Once was a sinner;
Now I'm a winner;
Cause Jesus turn me...

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