Best Bantering Poems
She jiggled like pink jello into the store
with platinum blonde hair and red rouge on her face
the shoe clerk mumbled it must be 1950's day
watching her strut around with a hanky made out of lace
She said hi hon you know why I'm here
he replied let me guess, you wear a size eight
she said well if the shoe fits I might as well wear it
and maybe later if you get lucky you can be my date
So she scouted around and found a pair
and sat down with tight dress flair
he thought to himself I think I'm in love with Mae West
looking her up and down and at her chest
He gently took her foot and slid her old high heel off
his hand sliding up and starting to cruise
she batted her eyelashes and said oh keep it coming, she toyed
saying, why don't you come up and see me later big boy
With that he winked and slid the new heels on
watching her walk around like Mae West
she said you know I know you like me big boy
but my eyes are up here and not on my chest
With that he gave her a long wolf whistle
and said you know I just can't resist
now stop acting your shoe size sexy
pulling her towards him giving her a passionate kiss
She whispered hon is that your gun
or are you just happy to see me
he said guess what my little chickadee
tonight you can be my Bacall and I'll be your Bogie
With that she left the store with customers galore
staring, whispering and looking aghast
he said out loud, come on... get a life...
I know we're a little kooky, but she happens to be my wife!
2-7-18
Categories:
bantering, funny love, silly,
Form:
Light Verse
Three busy witches stood stirring a stew
Cauldron filled with freaky things for a brew
Each Halloween they made
soup in their escapade
Adding ingredients to a brown roux
Jan, of course, as she always wants to do
added a bouquet garni of fresh poo
She said, "It's for flavour!
A taste that I favour."
There's no tellin' where she got it? No clue
Tania, from the north is witch number two
Stardust into the black cauldron, she threw
It made the others sneeze
Lin, witch three shouted, "Geeze!"
She exclaimed when in her face, stardust blew
The scents were mingling in the kitchen, Phew!
Some poet shouted, "Open the damn flue!"
The kitchen got too hot
From flames under the pot
Suddenly, a clock began to chime… CUCKOO
"I'll lower the heat so it doesn't spew."
Tania, the prudent said because she knew
Jan and Lin were laughing
Bantering and chaffing
Sometimes she'd like to tell those two to shoo!
Jan sliced the snout of what looked like a shrew
Lin poured in vials of green stuff... jou jou?
The brew started boiling
While they were still toiling
“Quick! Let's serve it before it turns to goo!”
Their brew was served to all the poets, who
said it seemed like someone made a boo-boo
The witches weren't upset
Twas their best prank yet
Soupers were cursed with Halloween voodoo
Some began to fly; in circles they flew
Others wailed with salty tears, oh boo hoo
The witches felt regret
They grew sad, but not yet...
Did they break the spell till fell morning dew
Categories:
bantering, halloween, humor,
Form:
Limerick
In for a penny, in for a pound
money makes the world go round.
“Baksheesh, pretty lady, Cleopatra eyes?”
foreign intrigue in a bantering guise.
“What do you want, My Queen?”
“Just for you, right here, behind the screen.”
One dollar, five pounds, the world goes round
in for a penny, in for a pound.
“Oh my beauty, please stay, please.
Come, come here, to my shop, stay for tea?”
“No hassle, so honest, nice things abound!”
Money, not love, makes the world go round.
*Baksheesh means a TIP in arabic.
Categories:
bantering, adventure, allegory, education, life,
Form:
Couplet
His interest awakens as a young woman
sauntered in the pub as he laid eyes on her bosom.
Enticing from the moment he saw her.
Her skin purrs of warm weather
copper honeysuckle, her eyes
waves' deep royal blue skies.
She wears a black plunging neckline leather dress
hugging her form, outlining every wonderful
feminine curve. She's striking and beautiful.
His thoughts a blur while she leans teasing
with eloquent banter.
With a smile she kicked off her black patent five
inch heels, singing as the riff of the music came alive
filling the room. He sought her unable to turn away
her teasing resistance and her friendly, bantering play.
He heard the rhythm trying his hardest to keep his distance.
Her wavy red hair loose a riot around her face
as she listens and dances across the room,
while the rest of her long locks fell down her back.
With the music going she closed her eyes
and did a little spin, there was a delectable teasing,
bright smile when she opened her eyes.
You tease me so nicely.
2-3-2018
Categories:
bantering, romantic,
Form:
Free verse
BAHAY KUBO
Our Bahay Kubo
Is made of light materials of woods, nipa and bamboo
It is situated near the sand dunes of the sea
Its fence surrounding it is made of bamboo too
And kitchen wares from indigenous and pottery also.
The style of the Kubo
Is a split design, though
The upper living room and a bedroom for two
While the basement is the kitchen where dining is with gusto
And the tub and bath are separated from the Kubo.
Our Bahay Kubo is intended for the duo
Whose lives are simple but nurtured with love
The serenity and oneness bring them together
A love nest just simply for the two.
Someday with their kids and grandkids
Will make the atmosphere livelier and more enjoyable
To tend native chicken, vegetables and other livestocks
For domestications and food for good times sake
With the stars and the moon as company from dusk to dawn.
Our Bahay Kubo
Is assembled mostly by loving neighbors,
Sharing, smiling, bantering at the end of the day
For Bahay Kubo is a symbol of bayanihan
Where everybody shares the fun!
Meanings:
Bahay Kubo is a small hut traditionally constructed with bamboo, generally found in
rural areas in the Phillipines (For further understanding, watch bahay kubo in u
tube)
Nipa is a palm leaf use as a roof for bahay kubo
Bayanihan is a term that suggests a spirit of unity and effort to achieve a particular
effort (from Wikipedia)
Categories:
bantering, places
Form:
Free verse
I wish that I had choked and died
On those chocolate candy bars.
I wish my mom had tanned my hide
About those tempting cookie jars.
I wish that I'd been tarred and feathered
For the dinners that I skipped
Because I preferred to gorge my taste
On Lays Potato Chips.
I'd like of course to quite forget
The delightful sweet 'life savers'
Which turned out to be unfortunately
A roll of nice teeth haters.
I wonder why my father
Didn't put a final stop
To the in-and-out of the refrigerator door
For another soda pop.
In truth, I would have received more mercy
From a family of alligators
Than the sticky, gooey caramel
Of flavored 'Now and Laters'.
The bantering I'll put aside
For I must now reflect
On the searing pain that's gripped me
Consuming tooth and jaw and neck.
I do agree the joke's on me
Now would someone please find
The 'painkillers'; the Orajel
Before I lose my mind.
RETA PRUITT
August 8, 2016
Categories:
bantering, candy, childhood, humor, pain,
Form:
Rhyme
My soul surrenders and soars like the elegant eagle
As my mind melds of the wolves wildly witted
Experiencing mother earth thru the eye of the needle
Frolicking forests as is perceptually permitted
The eagle explores over the running raging river
Thru eagle eyes I see the rivers enchanted edge
The wolf watches his prey who quizzically quiver
For both partake in a platonic paradisal pledge
I hunger like the wandering wolf and patiently wait
And the eagle takes me to far off landscape lands
For thus I use my written words as bantering bait
Thru poetic pacification my mind masterly expands
Of the watchful wolf and the elegant eagle
Admiring art perched on the artist’s easel.
June.07.2017
SPIRIT GUIDES - Contest
Sponsored by: White Wolf
Categories:
bantering, adventure, analogy, destiny,
Form:
Sonnet
Thanksgiving Day with prayers of thanks and blessings
Hue of warmth and rich amber and scarlet crowns losing
Ardent colors gleam beneath the trees as the golden sun is burning
November cool days are filled with gratitude; fields being prep for planting
Kempt and newly tilled, bare brown earth ready for anew birth of seeding.
Scrapbooks are soon opened as a reunion of family and friends are gathering
Grandma is in the kitchen preparing a feast with all the trimmings for Thanksgiving
Impatient children filled with enthused laughter and amusing bantering
Vibrant autumn accent a horn of plenty cornucopia, candlelight quivering
It’s exciting, gathering around the table to feast on golden-brown turkey that’s waiting
Nestled with stuffing, pumpkin pie golden brown and spicy sweet most appetizing
Grateful of bliss and blessings dear family and friends bring
11/5/2016
Categories:
bantering, autumn, blessing, family, food,
Form:
Monorhyme
Can we speak
our thoughts of truth.
Or are we afraid
to know.
Ask,
and there is nothing
I won't share with you.
You see,
how much time is lost,
bantering words,
and hiding behind
your feelings.
Categories:
bantering, life,
Form:
Free verse
Snoopy and Snowman
Snoopy challenged his huge friend, Snowman
Who has no legs, feet and two icicle hands
He gave him snowball and said, “Throw it!
If you can’t, I’ll call you a Triple Naught in 6 Feet!”
Snowman didn’t want Snoopy’s jeering stuffs
He accepted his challenge with his growling puffs
If I can, I’ll call you in turn a Double Diddly-squat
And a twisted nut-puppy who’s afraid of all cats
The two friends kept on bantering each other
Snowman got twigs from a tree without his ladder
Jabbed them on his sides like a pair of antlers
Sticking out like he’d swallowed two stags together
Before throwing, he bragged his brown hand-icicles
He didn’t know, snowball is a wheel of Santa’s bicycle
When he was about to hurl the snowball as far as he could
Santa shouted, “Do it! Both of you will have gifts:cat foods!”
Dec. 31,2017 12.15 pm
©2016Leonora Galinta
All Rights Reserved
Third Place
Contest: Silly Christmas Cartoon
Judged: 1/17/2017
Sponsor: Poet Laura Loo
Categories:
bantering, character, funny, humor, silly,
Form:
Rhyme
She blushed as the rose, taken from her ebony hair,
moved gracefully, slowly, sensually sliding,
brushing her eyelids, cheeks, and ruby lips,
tickled her neck, teased her décolletage, further
pinching her countenance with ruddy heat.
He spoke in whispers as the petals slid off
her shoulders, in the way he said “Oh Caroline”
like an ardent hymn, whilst the sun smiled
from his blazing eyes. The swing on the porch
gently swaying in the magnolia-scented breeze.
His fingers brushed her palms and rested upon
her lifeblood pulse, and he teased her with
gentility, spoke like the wind through her tresses,
“Oh, Car-o-line”
Even her name spoken slowly, precisely. He whispered
pleasures of the lips and tongue, of her breasts, hips
and waist. After his tenacious bantering, his knees
quivering, hit the floor, and like a prayer, once more
“Caroline, marry me, sweet Caroline”
and the excitement of diamonds
would ensure travel of soft curves
and ecstasy of dips and valleys.
She lifted her willowy lashes, deliberately
making his heart race, whispering his name,
whilst the second hand sipped lemonade,
and just as eloquent with her answer, pursed
her full lips and said, “be mine, my love”
2/5/2018
Eloquent Banner/Contest by Edward McCall
Categories:
bantering, beauty, love, sensual,
Form:
Verse
In an otherwise
uneventuful
morning, between the
roles we locked
eyes, bantering
without
mincing words, allowing
futures, names, and
rebuttals to
stem from our hearts
unmuffled, and
mingle.
A fearless
gig between the
staves ensued, bringing
us to melt in a
timeless
embrace of playful
reminders of our
unmistakeable, unshakeable, and
unutterable bond.
In a twine of echoes and
mirrors, between the
statements you
probed, between the
silences I
listened, between the
changes you
questioned, between the
questions I
changed.
Between encounters we
found
ourselves speaking our
undecipherable
Angelic language, between the
sentences we read
our souls so
smoothly.
Between the
grooves I think, between the
rules you feel, between the
lines we just
ARE.
Categories:
bantering, allegory, dance, language, love,
Form:
Free verse
Connoissuering Love
A toast to love! Celebrating four decades of togetherness
I raised the crystal glass of plum wine sparkling with love
Swirling the wine years of unflagging unity of two souls
I blushed in retrospect over years of pride of brewing it
In every nook and corner of the cellars in our hearts
The ethereal blood of gods gently poured into our every pore
Releasing the trapped essence of heavenly love
I held the wine to my berry lips and inhaled
The petrichor of romance one drop at a time
Its fragrance igniting every cell to linger on
Sip by sip scrooping every moment of bantering
The honeyed and the ivied to the perfumery of divine love.
October 15, 2015
Contest: Screwed 7
Sponsor: Rob Carmack
Categories:
bantering, love, together, wine,
Form:
Romanticism
The window panes shuddered
as he crawled back into his bed
of disillusion; waiting for
lightning to strike him
into some state
of normalcy.
The sky groaned at his
naked body, a gift of
mockery laid beside
him, bantering with
his need for her to stay.
She always left something
behind, maybe it was an
excuse for her to return?
Or was her mind really
that far away when he
was near?
He let the talisman
turn between his
fingers, and tried to
think of a proper prayer
for the occasion.
Nothing came to mind.
Instead,
he allowed the stone figure
to contemplate his eyes
and waited for her
to come back again.
She was the only one
that could ever make
it rain.
-James Kelley 2012, All rights reserved.
Categories:
bantering, break up, deep, metaphor,
Form:
Free verse
Spirited meeting, don't faint
Real or surreal, it is momentary, as cannot stay long on the same plane
Want to protect from mirthless life's winding chimes
Only if it was easy as mending the book's spine
Rarely lurking demons underneath the bed
Don't waste yourself peeking beneath the bed
Blindfold daydreaming,lines you up to heaped relics of unsung martyrs in a sepulcher
Starkly outshine rabid prince makes shy away the vulture
Never be too soft or daft
Not completely at fault, for programmed specimen of the mightier craft
Amidst the bantering on lease
Just don't succumb to the whisper of inherited guilt please
In summation to any wrong answer
Even rustling waft of your ashes will be sneezed at
Don't plug out the sound of closing doors
Sign to focus on the right one just designed for you
Betide as it was destined
Brush frivolous talk aside as choice is destiny's invoice
Essential to periodical diuresis of precarious enslavement
Rejoice to all sensations, before obfuscated by life's retirement
Categories:
bantering, anxiety, mentor, voice,
Form:
Free verse