Best All Wet Poems
My favorite cousin named Marge
is almost as big as a barge.
So one would assume,
not knowing the groom,
the guy would most likely be large.
But he was a small man named Tim
“As thin as a broom” describes him.
While Marge would guffaw,
Tim would watch her with awe
and just smile for he was so prim!
When the preacher addressed him and said,
“You may now kiss the bride,” Tim turned red,
for their lips could not meet.
With high heels on her feet,
Marge stood towering over his head.
She leaned down while Tim stood on his toes,
but for being in such a strange pose,
Marge then came toppling down
crushing Tim neath her gown
while the whole church erupted in “Ohhhhh’s.”
All was well, and thereafter, we ate;
then we planned next to dance until late.
But none could foresee
the small tragedy
that had us all leaving by eight!
Marge had tossed off her heels for a glide
on the dance floor, but when they both tried
to dance, Tim got snagged
by that dang gown and dragged
as his bride was beginning to slide. . .
Now shoeless, poor Marge could not stop.
Toward a table with candles on top,
they slid, and the groom
then set fire to the room
by landing with a belly flop.
Poor Tim by the candles got lit,
and we were all having a fit,
for the fire got spread fast
till the Best Man at last
got us all wet extinguishing it!
Inspired by the title of the movie: My Big Fat Greek Wedding
& : Joann Grisetti's "My Cousin's Wedding" Poetry contest
There once was a time
I called you just about every day
Years ago, that almost feel like yesterday
My friends may have thought I was a mama's boy
But that was okay
I'd call you anyway
Always interested in what you had to say
Now I ponder the time I've wasted
The hours I've lost
I guess living life has a cost
As within daily living we're tossed
Grown up problems and being bossed
Getting older
Hair turning to frost
I might call less
But you I'd never forget
Loving you is a sure bet
I know you will always listen
Whether I'm happy or upset
You're the one in my corner
When others think I'm all wet
Other's might have frilly moms
I love that you are strong
Your hugs one of my favorite things
They make me feel like I belong
So important
When sometime things go wrong
I know that you and me will always get along
So on this coming mother's day
I'll give thanks as I pray
Appreciative that you are more than okay
You are a one of a kind
My favorite
A true original
Better than Frank Sinatra
No apologies
Outrageous
Wonderful woman
Doing it your way!
I love you mom
Happy Birthday!
.
How strikingly gray
as the Spring rain
plummets
to the ground
The green
and brown
all wet
yet
no glittering from
the Sun's wink
I walk
not skip today
and the train
slowly slips away
so drifts
her wave
*Lyric: As in, 'Poetry Soups', Thoughts of the poet
What were you doing, alone in the woods, my John,
What were you doing out at dawn?
Why it hasn't rained for ages now,
So many failed crops, and fields you must plough.
Your dirty clothes are all so glum.
You're just a little dirty bum
You deserve no pity, my son.
Go up and clean yourself, get done,
There'll be no food for you tonight,
And don't dare cry you messy mite.
What were you doing, alone in the woods, my John,
What were you doing out at dawn?
You dared disobey me again,
Bastard idiot and a pain.
Look at your clothes, all wet with dew,
Torn without a valid reason, too.
Do you think that I can afford
Money needed, is all we hoard?
I'll show you what attire you'll fray.
I swear I'll tear your hideaway.
What were you doing, alone in the woods, my John,
What were you doing alone at dawn?
Did I not send you to get twigs,
Why do you behave like poor pigs?
What are those stains around your face?
Eating berries? Did you say grace?
There, how's that for a bloody punch?
Now your face looks best like a crunch,
Can't even take his correction.
Wipe that juice, you misconception.
What were you doing, alone in the woods, my John,
What were you doing alone at dawn?
Were you smooching with silly ****,
That goody goody, y mutt?
Go find a hooker, try to learn
What true pleasures women can burn.
You'll never learn from that hussy,
Good for nothing bit of lassie.
If I see you again with her,
Why I'll castrate you forever.
What were you doing, alone in the woods, my John,
What were you doing alone at dawn?
Were not your father there with you?
Why is your face so red and blue?
Why haven't you returned together?
Eating berries in this weather?
Why is your new shirt so blood-stained?
Don't you know he will have you chained!
Oh John, my John, you'll never learn
Your father will kill you, he's stern.
What's that smile on your face, my John?
What were you doing, alone in the woods, my son,
What were you doing?
placed 1
The sun is really high and hot;
his three-day shirt is all wet.
He carry academic papers in his file;
every day he walks for more than a mile,
looking for a way to get a decent job,
and save him from political mob.
Sometimes he wonders why he was born;
looking down at his shoes so torn.
Pain and misery is visible on his face,
as he toils hard on the rat race.
His hands are so strong and rough,
adapted to the world so tough.
He lived alone – he’s an orphan;
sometimes he tries out heroin,
to forget his childhood trauma,
and focus on life’s daily drama.
In his heart he carries a song,
which he sings when days are long…..
Wintry night, the clouds were churning
While the lightning lit the sky
The old house it shook and trembled
As the howling wind went by.
I put out the waning candle
Total darkness all around
It felt cold, in bed I snuggled
Heard the thunder’s drawling sound.
It took ages till I drifted
Into rough and restless sleep
When at once I felt me falling
Down a tunnel deep and steep.
Chilly hands wrapped tight around me
Felt the breathing of a ghost;
In a daze it tugged and led me
To the open ragged coast.
Had no strength or will to struggle
The cold water dragged me down
Uncontrolled the helpless feeling
Of a man about to drown.
Then I woke all of a sudden
And I saw the dawning light
Found myself all wet and sweaty
From the dream I had that night.
So relieved! I felt elated.
What an ugly fright I’d had.
Then I looked and saw beside me
Soaking seaweed on the bed!!
-------------------------------------------
23rd October 2014
Contest: Ghosts Stories
Sponsor: Kelly Deschler
Placed: 4th
A red moon greeted me as I arrived at Eilean Donan Castle,
late at dinner time, a heat wave wrecking zest
of our intended peaceful nightly rest.
It was late but I decided on a nocturnal swim.
O blessed water, so calm, so cool, so placid.
Suddenly I heard the crash of the waves,
an echo, a forlorn ululation of sweet melodious tune.
Alarmed I looked behind and saw a fog cover the lake.
Foamy white lamb-like waves danced around me.
The waves dragged me up on to the sandy beach.
Behind me I saw a figure surrounded by a nebula,
Swimming slowly towards the splendiferous shore.
She came out all wet still wearing an old-fashioned gown.
Both out of breath, we lay on the smooth sand.
Above a red moon shone brightly that cloaked the stars.
In the strange night we looked at each other and smiled.
Soon we were embraced in a long lingering kiss.
Ecstasy escalated rapidly, emotions running riot,
Until the red moon descended behind Donan Castle.
I turned back to her and saw her in the water
Swimming into a swirling mist and disappear.
Back at the castle I climbed up to my room.
There hanging on the wall was a painting of her doom.
Lady Murdina, Warrior of the Sea, drowned 1888.
Seeing the painting and the date, I fainted.
7 January 2022
A Ghost Story Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Angela Tune
Cry Baby Cat,
was a stray that turned up
wailing outside our front door.
We never turn down a stranger in town,
especially when clouds
have gathered to storm.
Beginning to pour, I opened the door,
and we welcomed him in, as the thunder began
Well, he shivered, and wailed even more!
His coat was all wet,
like a little drowned rat
so I dried him, the best that I can.
We fed him a bit,
and settled the cat
in a box, filled with blankets, within.
Found a new litter box, and tucked it away
not far, where the kitty would stay.
We turned off the lights, but the thunder and fright
scared the cat, and he soon disappeared !
Right under our bed, .....so while poking my head
'neath the spread of the bed, I said "Here, kitty, kitty"...
and my heart had such pity, for the poor little fit he was in.
And that's how it began, scaredy cat had no friends
Till we fell head over heels till the end!
He was just a cry-baby....., and although we said "maybe"
he picked us back then, as his kin
________________________________________________
For Francine's Contest: Beloved Pets 6/18/15
the sun is mean here
it’s too bright
and i don’t mean smart
it shines in my eyes
i have to wear dark glasses just to drive
yesterday it burned my skin
but today i am ready
i’m wearing lotion
spf one thousand
if that doesn’t work
i’m wearing my long underwear
of course the sun will make me sweat
it is a nasty vengeful sun
i’ll be all wet
i am going to wear it down
that’s the wrong spelling of wear isn’t it?
with all this heat i can’t think
sun stroke maybe
i'm fed up i am going to get rid of it
i'll look mean
scare it down
i'll make it go away
oh my goodness
it’s working finally
the sun is leaving
the sun is gone
hurray
oh no
i can't believe it
look
the sun
it just mooned me.
So She knew
That declaration of love
It took me by surprise
We hadn’t spoken for decades
The cut off when I didn’t reply
Later the daily prayers she sent up
I still did not know
Then the bald picture
It frightened me
She asked how I liked it
I replied in silence
She sensed my shock and lied
Its my new hair style
I completely missed it
She called to say Happy D died
I was sad and cried a little
We grew up together
They were both my (girl)friends
She asked me to send a donation
Then sent pictures at the funeral
She looked healthy with her white smile
When we parted as teenagers
That smile always stayed with me
We used to be mischievous
Playing in the rain all wet
Everybody knew then she left
And now two more pictures
She had lost a lot of weight
I barely recognized her
A gold ring on her withered hand
A grandchild on the other
They were dressing for church
Several months passed
I called again in vain
Finally the news came
She was gone …
She couldn’t wait for me
I have been thinking of her
Those days long long ago
I would wait up to catch a glimpse
Or perhaps to talk as she came by
I remember her other leaving
Like this one without goodbye
She had shielded me again
I just now caught on
THE BATHROOM
I’ve got three older sisters,
Lindsey, Sue and Kate,
And every single morning,
They try to make me late.
They get into the bathroom,
And then they lock the door.
So I knock and knock with both my hands
Until they’re really sore.
They stay in there for hours!
I really don’t know why,
Because I can wash all over
In two minutes if I try,
Just because I’m only five
They think that I’m a pest,
But it’s cold outside the bathroom door
In just your shorts and vest.
I have to wait ‘til Mum comes up
When she hears me shout.
She says “I’m counting up to five”!
At three they all rush out.
When I go in the floor’s all wet,
With towels everywhere.
The walls and mirror are covered with steam,
And the sink is full of hair.
One day I’ll get up early,
And I’ll be very cruel.
I’ll sit in the bathroom for half an hour,
And make THEM late for school.
"Love, Drys The Ink" (32809)
let me draw you a picture
plant it on your lips
crave it inside your heart
so love won't miss
cut at your heart strings
till the paint all wet
love you so deep, love you all so long
that angel began to sing our love songs
so now is the time to set your heart free
place all your wants, softly under me
and take a deep breath and hold on tight
there only pleasured pain
so, no need to fight
now let the story be written
till the ink start to dry
because in our fairytale
there only forever
with just You and I~
aka:lyricvixen
Form:
Back in 2013 the President 'resetting,' drew a line in the sand
Syria sprinted across it; faced no response from our end
So, Bashir Assad killed his own countrymen with chemical gas
hundreds upon thousands fled Syria, Europe's problem, alas*
Then near the end of his term, ignoring his every general's advice
DJT threatened to pull the plug on Afghanistan one night
--thought a quick exit for his 'resume' would be nice
And now JB's gone and done it, what a horrific choice we face
To recognize the Taliban, an admission of disgrace
A low blow to all our brave troops who died in that place
Yet if we cut off the Taliban; if we can't bite out lips
ISIS stands ready to blow Afghanistan to bits
Now I'm not just complaining; I've a simple solution at hand
No more Presidents play-acting Commander-in-Chief
-- without military service beforehand
Let's have a former soldier who honors and respects his command
who can discern perils in jungles, deserts and mountain badlands
If this means a separate office for Commander-in-Chief
I'm all for it: Enough of my countrymen's (and the free world's) disbelief
And if you feel I'm all wet, think 2029... Try to envision
AOC** reviewing troops, making life-and-death decisions
_______________________________________________________
*Even today, as I write this, Syrians homeless since 2013 are being
used as political pawns by Russia and Belarus, who have flown them
in (!) to crowd the border of Poland, where they 'live' in unsanitary,
makeshift 'cities' -- all as part of Russian blackmail to force Poland
and its European backers' hands. (Source: Wall-Street Journal,
November 13, 2021, page 1 report).
**Alexandra Ocasio-Cortez... a popular 30 year-old member of the
House of Representatives, an avowed Democrat-Socialist, who's
backed open borders, defunding the police, and many other such
'progressive policies.'
MADE
of sock puppets, dunk tanks and bumper cars.
socks with holes, holes for heads
all wet, stinky in fact
picture the bumper cars
bumping, bruising
each choosing their own way
headed for you and me
out of control
nothing seems to matter
it’s all clatter
“Collateral damage,”
that’s all
no matter
towns burning
blue uniforms stewing
little ones, immovable,
staring
deck of cards, blue and red
thrown sky high
sobering thought…
God is watching
8/19/2020
remember when the playground slept
in dreams that seldom smiled
the merry-goes and seesaws wept~
few truths were reconciled
yet still, the empty swings
bade lonely hearts to sit
all wet from early morning dew
and tears from wasted wishes
there was no one to push the swing
and laugh at tethered flight~
we stretched our legs, a song to sing
to snapping wind and kites
what raucous silence joined the din
and danced its dizzy spell
as twilight curtains drew their shade
upon the waning stage
I begged my slumber to be still
imagination tossed~
but dreams will tarry on until
their memory is lost