Laura Breidenthal Poet Free verse

Your Ashes

You tapped my shoulder, lightly…eagerly…
Before it happened, I sensed your eyes,
And I turned ever so slightly,
Your face in the corner of my eye
Your face…it was serious…
As if getting my attention was a chore
It was a chore…to withhold all my tears…
I absolutely love you—how sickened I am…
You crush me in your green eyes…
Those words…though few, annihilate me

I am certain in your mind you were pleading for words
You wanted to flee from my sight, but I was there first
Sketching on my notebook, a girl in love-verse

I know you meant to speak to me,
To get it all over with…
So that the chore could be over
And you could return in your shell
As I wallow in the suspense of my nervous hell

I was not waiting for you to speak…
I heard your mind before your hesitant touch
As if you were fooling with fire…
And I licked your fingers with burns

I cherished your pained attention
How foolish, how pitiable…

I felt much, when you tapped my shoulder,
So restlessly, so quickly, so frighteningly…
I turned my head at you…

The chance was yours to take
I never meant to burn you…
Now, alone, I must settle with your ashes……..

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Honestly J.T. February 4, 2015 at 12:55 PM Sad story, good poem. I enjoyed reading. Thanks for sharing -JT Laura Breidenthal March 17, 2015 at 8:57 PM Thank you again JT! ~Laura

David Brown January 31, 2015 at 5:41 PM Sometimes the title of a work can grab our attention and make me want to read. Such was the case with this and I am so glad I followed my instinct; what a beautiful, beautiful piece Laura. Stunning is the word that comes to mind.... David Laura Breidenthal January 31, 2015 at 11:11 PM Glad to have stunned you, David. And thank you very much for reading this poem. True events, many tears, but lessons learned... Makes a good poem I hope! Something good out of something...eh....not so good. ;) ~Laura

Justin Bordner January 27, 2015 at 2:20 AM I care so much about you Laura...your work is so pure...so brave in the scream of selfish pain...and when you express love joy its like purple sunshine to me...and then there are your poems of Faith and mature metaphysics that make life so comprehensible. I proudly fight with you...J.A.B. Laura Breidenthal January 27, 2015 at 12:22 PM Purple sunshine - what a lovely vision! I care about you too Justin...you are my true guardian of light..I appreciate your care, your love, and your sweet understanding. If only I could express my joy. Thank you...you uplifted me today...I really needed that! ~Laura

Davina Browne January 26, 2015 at 10:42 AM amazing, felt all the emotions here, love your writing dee xxx bless it be Laura Breidenthal January 26, 2015 at 7:27 PM Your emotional poems move me greatly, Davina. You are a beautiful poet who feels a lot...thank you for your sweetness..I will read more of yours tonight.~Laura

Justin Bordner January 25, 2015 at 8:42 PM I'm starving in the suspense of not knowing what was said by your anxious lover...the lover that your heartache ambushed with amber fire..."Sketching in my notebook, a girl in love verse..." once more Laura, beautiful ambiguity. as with the preceeding moment, yet there is a clarity of love misery, a terrible revelation leading to a tragic termination. You make pain so thoughtful, so beautiful Laura...J.A.B. Laura Breidenthal January 26, 2015 at 7:25 PM If I revealed to you what he said, you would much rather starve unknowingly, I am certain. . thank you for reading the poem... pain is unfortunate at time, though necessary for revelations, for experiences such as this. I draw sketches of your light now tonight. Thank you Justin, for joining me in this fight...~Laura

Eileen Manassian January 25, 2015 at 1:07 PM This is a very well written poem, my dear. Your emotions are there to be felt...as you felt that tap on your shoulder. Powerful write....Hugs Laura Breidenthal January 25, 2015 at 8:29 PM Thanks Eileen. I wrote this with tears and deep, dark emotion. I love your visits. Thank you! ~Laura

Casarah Nance January 25, 2015 at 7:25 AM Wow, this was good! I love it. :) Laura Breidenthal January 25, 2015 at 8:29 PM Thanks Casarah! Your name is beautiful by the way, as well as your avatar! ~Laura

Tim Smith January 25, 2015 at 6:55 AM Our mind has more than the five senses I believe...being able to read a person or feeling a vibe or maybe a tension in the air knowing what is going to be said or done before it happens..I have a few others that come in dreams but they are sporadic. Loved your verse....hugs Tim Laura Breidenthal January 25, 2015 at 8:28 PM How interesting Tim...thanks for sharing that with me, and taking the time to read. So glad you loved it. : ) I agree with you wholeheartedly by the way...there are certain things we ca just feel..before the action of touch....before the action of mystery...~Laura