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Under the Sea

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Under the Sea (English Sonnet) I’d like to go beneath the sea exploring wonders down below where fish and creatures dwell for free and undeterred the currents flow. A submarine like Nemo had would serve me well to venture deep. This would not be a passing fad or an adventure on the cheap. Submerged Atlantis I would seek Poseidon, too, trident in hand; a lingua franca we could speak for Greek is hard to understand! I’d like to go beneath the sea then share with you its mystery. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - An English sonnet follows the pattern 'abab cdcd efef gg'. Every line should be ten syllables long, but in this case an exception has been made, thus 8 syllables are being used. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Contest: Where I Want to Go Sponsor: Nicola Byrne Placed 2nd © 3rd March 2017

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Susan Ashley

Date: 1/11/2018 7:42:00 PM

Your beautiful write is wrapped in a luscious melodic rhythm, Paul. An enchanting and adventurous poem with lively imagery that sparkles. Warmest wishes my friend. ~Susan

Paul Callus
Date: 1/15/2018 3:22:00 PM

Excuse the late reply, Susan, but apart from being busy I've had my computer playing me up, too. Thank you for this sparkling feedback:) ~ Warm regards // paul

Darlene De Beaulieu

Date: 9/8/2017 3:26:00 PM

I found myself being part of the poem. It is beautifully written. Have a nice day my friend.

Paul Callus
Date: 9/10/2017 3:03:00 AM

Thank you for the lovely comments, Darlene; so glad you enjoyed it. Have a nice Sunday, my friend. Regards // paul

Robert Lindley

Date: 7/2/2017 10:37:00 AM

Truly a fine sonnet and, TOP CLASS SONNET EVEN WITH THE ALTERATION TO EIGHT SYLLABLES, that delights when read my friend. O' how do I so dearly wish that you would write more sonnets and display your marvelous talent by doing so! A fav...

Robert Lindley
Date: 7/2/2017 10:19:00 PM

WITH YOUR TALENT YOU COULD IF EVER YOU CHOSE TO DO SO MY FRIEND. We each write in the way that pleases us and we think best. I love all poetry but have a special relationship with sonnets. This sonnet shows that you can write TOP CLASS IN THE SONNET FORM.

Paul Callus
Date: 7/2/2017 1:07:00 PM

Thank you for your kind, generous feedback, Robert! I love sonnets, even though I will never be able to compete with your prolific sonnets, my friend. ~ Hope you are keeping well. Regards // paul

Charlie Smith

Date: 3/20/2017 9:45:00 PM

Paul i'm having a situation with my plumbing , I know it's not Nenos boat but it's a start,,,have yoiu the tiime.??? Congratulations on a great write... ..

Paul Callus
Date: 3/21/2017 5:32:00 PM

Hi Charlie...I'd gladly give you a hand, but distance is a bit of a problem, but I can lend you my imagination...it's a trusty tool:) Thank you for a pleasant visit. Regards // paul

David Pekrul

Date: 3/11/2017 2:31:00 PM

Good Sonnet and subject matter. Good luck in the contest.

Paul Callus
Date: 3/11/2017 3:30:00 PM

Thank you for reading and commenting, David. Pleased to make your acquaintance. Regards // paul

Lynn Marie

Date: 3/10/2017 2:13:00 PM

A delightful sonnet Paul :-) Very melodic, great imagery, A fun adventure, very well penned :-) many blessings to you, lynn

Paul Callus
Date: 3/10/2017 4:33:00 PM

Thank you for your positive feedback, Lynn; so pleased you like it:) Warm regards // paul

Doug Vinson

Date: 3/10/2017 11:38:00 AM

"In an octopus's garden..." ; ) Paul, so very well done - a pleasure to read. I think 8 syllables per line are one of the most natural and "right" sounding ways to write poetry.

Paul Callus
Date: 3/10/2017 4:39:00 PM

Hi Doug...I suppose the Beatles might have put this one to music, too:) If my memory serves me well it was featured in 'Abbey Road'. Yes, I agree with you, 8 syllables comes very natural; in fact I use it a lot when writing lyrics for songs. Thank you for your encouraging input. Regards // paul

Eve Roper

Date: 3/8/2017 8:18:00 PM

Wonderful and great imigary a7 good luck in the contest :-) hugs

Paul Callus
Date: 3/9/2017 2:16:00 PM

Thank you, Eve. I am pleased you enjoyed it:) Hugs // paul

Alexis Y.

Date: 3/8/2017 6:42:00 PM

Hi Paul, You've a good entry for contest theme. It was a beautiful voyage and I enjoyed the ride. I wish you the best of luck in the contest. A without doubt seven :-) Alexis

Paul Callus
Date: 3/9/2017 2:08:00 PM

I'm pleased you decided to join the ride, Alexis:) Thank you for enjoying and for the faith you show in this entry. Regards // paul

Deborah Burch

Date: 3/8/2017 5:04:00 PM

This is beautiful Paul!! Humour...adventure...flow...got it all!! I doubt I could speak pidgin! I'd have to use sign language! ;) well done. Best wishes for the contest. Big Hugggs. deb

Paul Callus
Date: 3/10/2017 4:20:00 PM

Thank you Deb:)

Deborah Burch
Date: 3/9/2017 3:04:00 PM

Paul 'lingua franca' is the better choice...says so much more!! You did fabulous!! :) Big Hugggs. deb

Paul Callus
Date: 3/9/2017 2:05:00 PM

Thank you, Deborah:) Incidentally I had written 'sign language' in place of 'lingua franca', but had to change it because of metric inconsistency. hugs ~ paul

Lisa Ricci

Date: 3/4/2017 1:53:00 PM

I very much liked the theme. The chosen words make it come alive. The sonnet look in great form and stay true to the voice flow and sound. Good luck with the contest. Well done

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 9:10:00 AM

Thank you for stopping by with lovely and meaningful comments, Lisa. So pleased to make your acquaintance:) Regards ~ paul

John Hamilton

Date: 3/4/2017 10:16:00 AM

Very nice write Paul, very melodic and inviting, should do well in the contest.

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 10:39:00 AM

Thank you for the positive review, John. Regards // paul

Emile Pinet

Date: 3/4/2017 9:28:00 AM

Your words where enchanting in this bouncy song like poem, that flows with a lyrical beat. Your word choices are descriptive and lively, bouncing through this poem with style and finesse. Emile.

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 9:06:00 AM

Thank you for the insightful feedback, Emile. You make a really good critic:) Best regards...paul

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 3/4/2017 7:12:00 AM

This brought to mind Jacque Cousteau. I use to love watching his under water adventures as a kid. Well expressed my friend.

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 8:57:00 AM

I watched many of Cousteau's sea documentaries, Richard. Jacque Cousteau came to Malta and said that some diving spots here were among the best he had ever seen. Regards // paul

Nette Onclaud

Date: 3/4/2017 12:39:00 AM

being ariel for some days would be exciting.. your dreamy poem delivers such poetic wonder, paul... huggs

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 8:13:00 AM

A sense of adventure and a fertile imagination can keep us forever young, Nette:) Thank you for a pleasant visit. Hugs // paul

Judy Ball

Date: 3/4/2017 12:13:00 AM

I really like this Paul. Well done. Love the pics. Perfect for a children's book. God Bless and good luck in the contest. A big 7 from me. JB

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 10:56:00 AM

Thank you, Judy. I believe that there is always beauty in simplicity. Regards // paul

Ilene Bauer

Date: 3/3/2017 8:23:00 PM

this is beautiful, paul, and your rhythm and rhyme are spot-on! i love the line about greek being hard to understand, too - very funny...

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 10:59:00 AM

Coming from you this is very encouraging, Ilene; when it comes to rhythm and rhyme you never let your guard down:) Glad you caught on to the Greek reference! Regards // paul

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 3/3/2017 6:06:00 PM

Oh I meet see you there..I always loved to be The little Mermaid :)..Lovely poem..Such fun to read..And I watched the Nemo movie....Actually many Disney Movies with Chri..Lovely.

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 11:42:00 AM

Thank you for reading and liking, Charm. You'll make a lovely mermaid:) Like you I have watched many Disney films with Vale, but now slowly she is moving on to more 'adult' ones. Regards // paul

Jan Allison

Date: 3/3/2017 6:02:00 PM

Thank you for letting me be part of your underwater adventure Paul.. I'm much happier on the water than the thought of going into the sea to explore ... I swim like a stone and nearly drowned so that is probably the reason why lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 11:40:00 AM

Glad to have you on the trip to keep me company, Jan:) Don't worry about being under water...imagination will keep us away from all perils:) Hugs // paul

Heidi Sands

Date: 3/3/2017 5:44:00 PM

I like how you wrote this one, Paul. Very creative. Good luck in the contest :)

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 11:20:00 AM

I'm so pleased that you found it to your liking, Heidi:) Thank you for stopping by. Regards // paul

Chris Green

Date: 3/3/2017 5:27:00 PM

This was really good Paul, definitely an adventure worth reading and dreaming about. I really liked this, it flowed smoothly and had a nice melody to it. Good luck in the contest.

Paul Callus
Date: 3/6/2017 11:14:00 AM

Your feedback is a generous gift, Chris. Thank you, my friend. Regards // paul