Notes About The Poem

This Darkness

Forlorn clouds of loneliness engulf me in shades of grey,
  pastel sounds of life and love grow dimmer to me every day.
I can feel the burning sunshine dancing on my back,
  snatching colors from my world, it melts them into black.

Lost amidst the stars somewhere I once heard a storybook rhyme,
  the girl who said she'd always love me is now once upon a time.
Before this darkness found me I saw roses everywhere,
  now piercing thorns of emptiness are more than I can bear.

I long to view the peaceful sea; all I hear are the crashing waves,
  to read between the lines of living; my eyes are but dots on a page.
To witness lightning's warning of the thunder that I fear,
  the stream of life flows by me, leaving only sights I can hear.

The wind brushes through my hair on its way to the towering trees,
  the streams rushing through my soul on their path to the faraway seas; 
like the wind we blow away, 
like the stream we flow away,
  on our journey to the tomb of eternity.


Written 4 Nov 2020
Copyright © | Year Posted 2020

Poem

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La France Avatar
November 23, 2020 at 3:43 PM
John, congratulations on your win in the contest with this wonderful write _Constance
Dietrich Avatar
November 22, 2020 at 5:42 PM
John, your entry truly captured the theme "hello darkness my old friend" SO WELL DONE. Congrats. I am glad you made this list.
Chamberlain Avatar
November 22, 2020 at 2:26 PM
I really enjoyed reading your poem, I loved the way it flowed, a favourite of mine, in this competition. Congratulations on your winning placement. :-)
Watt Avatar
November 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM
That's very kind of you to say, Joanna. I appreciate the friendly visit ~ John
Canerdy Avatar
November 22, 2020 at 12:28 PM
CONGRATS on your well-deserved win, John. Janice
Watt Avatar
November 22, 2020 at 2:50 PM
Thank you, Janice! I appreciate you reading this . Enjoy your day ~ John
Fowler Avatar
November 22, 2020 at 8:31 AM
Congratulations on the win John! Linda
Watt Avatar
November 22, 2020 at 10:23 AM
Thank you, Linda! So kind of you to stop by ~ John
Barden Avatar
November 12, 2020 at 2:09 PM
Nicely done, John ... I enjoyed this thoroughly! Rhythmic metre, solid rhyme, gorgeous imagery, and shadowy substance - great stuff!
Watt Avatar
November 12, 2020 at 2:54 PM
A thumbs up from the Bard always makes my heart sing. Thanks you for letting me know the specifics of what you like, my brother. Hope you're having a great day ~ John
Proxenos Avatar
November 8, 2020 at 8:48 AM
Hi John A great deal of emotion within this write and it flows through darkness, the crashing waves, the towering trees, the faraway sea, we flow away, on our journey to the tomb of eternity' Such a sad write, but so elegantly and exquisitely expressed. An absolute fave. Hugs and blessings, Jennifer.
Watt Avatar
November 8, 2020 at 10:41 PM
Thank you for thinking so, Jenn. You probably know by now I don't do dark poems often, but I'm glad you felt the emotions in this one. Thankfully it's fictional and I've never had to go through such a time of despair. I appreciate the fave, my dear friend ~ John
Dietrich Avatar
November 6, 2020 at 7:33 PM
thanks for all your lovely comments on so many of my poems, John. I wish I could repay you, but I think I've seen all your poems. I want to check and see what your "best" is considered right now.
Watt Avatar
November 6, 2020 at 9:50 PM
You are welcome, my friend! Reading your poetry is always a pleasure, and does not require being paid back, other than to know you will keep writing wonderful poetry.
Dietrich Avatar
November 5, 2020 at 2:59 PM
wow, a lot of pathos and such imagery of darkenss. This is really well described, John. A fave!
Watt Avatar
November 5, 2020 at 9:11 PM
Thank you for these affirming words, Andrea. I greatly appreciate your fave, and your wonderful poetry friendship ~ John
Ashley Avatar
November 5, 2020 at 11:33 AM
Ohh, poetic ink does flow with dark and aching beauty through poignant depths of lost love imagery. Every line cries with longing, despair and mourning; "the girl who said she'd always love me is now once upon a time." This poem tenderly and movingly plays upon my heartstrings, John, but especially this line; "The wind brushes through my hair on its way to the towering trees," - so exquisite and striking in the feeling of being insignificant, especially in the heart of the girl whose love you lost. Stunning sadness so elegantly expressed. Warmest wishes, my dear friend.. ~Susan
Watt Avatar
November 5, 2020 at 9:10 PM
Susan, what a dear friend you are to dive deep into these writes and emerge with just the right words to affirm your humble poetry brother. I know the blind can live very fulfilling lives, but this metaphor was about the emotionally blind who have lost all hope, in this case from losing a lover and giving in to fear of the future. You are very kind to honor this write with the depth and breadth of your empathy and friendship. Thank you ~ John
Downing  Avatar
November 4, 2020 at 3:49 PM
This is truly beautiful. I love the last verse . Great job, and good luck in the contest:)
Watt Avatar
November 4, 2020 at 4:24 PM
Thank you Akkina for your visit and generous assessment. ~ John
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