The Worst of Midnight Snacks

In the middle of the night With sleep still in my eyes I stepped into my kitchen And received quite a surprise As I reached out my hand And flicked the light on There were balloons, confetti, party hats With a banner that read -WELCOME HOME- I'd caught thousands of roaches In the middle of song They all turned and looked at me strange As if I'd done something wrong I heard a scream from the crowd A foreign language to me The next thing I know I'm knocked down to my knees As I'm being dragged Across the linoleum floor I see a little red button That opens up a trap door I started getting real nervous The deeper we went If I was a cat with nine lives I think eight I just spent They took me before the king King Ralph Roach was his name I only knew that Cause that's what his name tag displayed I was assigned a public defender But that did me no good He spoke Roach, I spoke Human Each other we never quite understood "GUILTY!" Came the verdict I hollered what was my crime! "Interrupting a roach in the middle of having a good time" Came the judges reply Squishing to be my death The day after tomorrows last night I said that doesn't make any sense?! Hey, we're roaches....we're not known for our timely insight So here I sit in my cell Wishing I could take it all back If I had just not gotten up For that late midnight snack Wait....is that a tap, tap, tap (You didn't think this was the end did you?) As my hours getting late A roach we'll call Chester For anonymity sake Told me to stop all that blubbering I've come to break you out of here I stood and we hugged Which would be strange if it wasn't so weird We slipped past room after room With all kinds of parties inside One thing you can say about roaches They know how to have a good time When we reached the surface All I saw was blessed heavenly light I went straight in and packed my bags And gave the house to my Ex-Wife (Okay, now it's the end!) I pride myself on my deep poetic insight..