Notes About The Poem

The Truth Hurts

You’d cheated in the past, I'd felt so lost and alone so I’m curious when you go outside to use your phone Then you won’t let that darn mobile out of your sight fallacious rows ensue; just where were you last night? You say that you were working, you’re a jobbing builder yet this extra work now gives me cause to bewilder Then you tantalize me; say you’re telling the truth and that you’re no longer bedding that floozy Ruth I ask to see your phone, needing indisputable proof that your affair’s really over between you and Ruth You head for the door, and just turn your back on me your continued infidelity is crystal clear for me to see Next thing I know you begin packing your suitcase say you’ll stay with a pal, that you need some space The red mist comes down; I grab a long kitchen knife plunge it deep into your chest, thereby ending your life A vortex of scarlet blood splatters onto the kitchen floor I eviscerate your body; as a surgeon I’ve done this before Later I scroll through your call logs, to my shock and surprise there's no calls to other women, you'd not been telling me lies! Eight Word Challenge 7 Contest Sponsored by John Hamilton Words used Fallacious, Eviscerate, Curious, Bewilder, Plunge,Tantalize Vortex, Scarlet 6/21/18
Copyright © | Year Posted 2018

Poem

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Lane Avatar
June 30, 2018 at 5:56 PM
well, I can't understand why this wasn't on the winning list. It's perfectly suited for the use of the required words and easily understood.
Allison Avatar
June 30, 2018 at 6:09 PM
Thanks Lin, I enter fewer and fewer contests and currently have a block of 5 n/a in a row yet all the rules were followed to the letter, I plod on with the writing still:-) hugs jan xx
Flaherty Avatar
June 29, 2018 at 6:41 PM
Jan my Buddy. I see you follow Lyric Man I was inspired to write a poem of my own called Avatar Troll in response. Please check it out let me know what you think. ta cheers
Allison Avatar
June 29, 2018 at 6:46 PM
LM and I have been buddies since we joined in the same week in 2014, sadly his stalker also attacked me in the past with nasty poems and soup mails using fake account names as she was so obsessed by him and thought we were more than friends - now she's just faked her death on another site and is blaming LM for her demise - sad isn't it:-( will drop by now:-) hugs jan xx
Wolf Avatar
June 25, 2018 at 7:38 PM
Passion, Sex, Violence, Death -- This one's got it all -- complete with surprise ending! Terrific, Jan! ~ Gershon
Allison Avatar
June 26, 2018 at 8:05 AM
Thanks Gershon, its good to go to the dark side once in a while lol:-) I do worry about my muse:-) hugs jan xx
Flaherty Avatar
June 24, 2018 at 5:07 PM
Got it sorry Jan . Still bedding that floozy Ruth. Loved this line reminded me of the t.v program Bread the mother slagging off his floozy. And eviscerate like a surgeon Beware the women scorned Very Glen Close bunny boiler
Flaherty Avatar
June 24, 2018 at 5:47 PM
Sounds like my entire dating history . Steer well clear of her.
Allison Avatar
June 24, 2018 at 5:23 PM
Oh I loved Bread, such awesome characters, sadly I know of one bunny boiler Chris - she makes my character look pure and innocent lol:-) hugs jan xx
Wigley Avatar
June 23, 2018 at 11:52 PM
I got round it by putting my paramore's name in my contacts as 'Virgin mobile'. Well, she did get around a bit....... Dark write, good twist, good luck ! x
Allison Avatar
June 24, 2018 at 1:27 PM
ha ha ha love that 'virgin mobile' lol:-) hugs jan xx
Bavington  Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 9:13 AM
The sad thing is that this does happen. It makes it rough for the one who is innocent. They shouldn't have to show their phone. This poem just goes to show that jumping to conclusions is not the way to go. Good poem using the words you were given. Thank you for visiting my site.
Allison Avatar
June 24, 2018 at 1:26 PM
Sadly it does happen Bette and not everything we think is happening is as clear cut as we think:-( hugs Jan xx
Gentile Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 8:56 AM
Wow and I was just about to let that floozy Ruth have it !!! This is just great Jan, absolutely love it xxoo
Allison Avatar
June 24, 2018 at 1:25 PM
Thanks Mike:-) not everything in life is black and white:-) hugs jan xx
Beaufort Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 8:30 AM
This is very funny. Great job on using the seven words. You have such a great imagination, I am always blown away by what you write. And we have all seen people jump to conclusions at times. The graphic description of killing was so serious I couldn't help but laugh at your composition realizing the fun you had creating it. Now, how does the cover up happen?
Allison Avatar
June 24, 2018 at 1:24 PM
ooh I don't know if I can do a cover up Duke :-) hugs jan xx
Man Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 7:46 AM
Jan, this is a sad reality. Don't trust a man always on his phone but never open to pass it over to you. I grieve over a world of cheats were so few understand true love and it's power to transform one's life! This should finish high in the contest for sure!
Allison Avatar
June 24, 2018 at 1:24 PM
Thanks so much LM, of course the cheating with mobiles applies to both sexes:-( I'm thankful I have a wonderful relationship with my hubby and we have no secrets:-) hugs Jan xx
Mhangwa Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 3:13 AM
What a tragic ending, I could feel the tension in the poem from beginning to end! Best wishes in the contest
Allison Avatar
June 24, 2018 at 1:20 PM
Thanks Kudzai:-) hugs jan xx
Talbot Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 2:11 AM
Love that punchline, loved the poem! Been down that road a few times, with the kids, thinking they were up to no good. The worst was when the two girls were acting a bit strange when challenged, they refused to tell me what they were up to, of course, that made me even more suspicious. I eventually got it out of them, they were sorting a birthday surprise for me. Never felt so bad. Wishing you all the best for the contest! hugs Mick
Allison Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 7:25 AM
Aww mick i can imagine how bad you must have felt:-( hugs Jan xx
Turner Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 1:32 AM
Trust is one of the most important things for a successful marriage. Without it, the relationship is DOOMED! Love the twist but ain't that the way it always goes:) Good luck, Jan.
Allison Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 7:24 AM
I went across to the dark side DT lol:-) hugs Jan xx
Roper Avatar
June 21, 2018 at 9:42 PM
Very well done, women scorned ; love it Hugs Eve ~' *
Allison Avatar
June 22, 2018 at 7:22 AM
Thanks so much eve :-) hugs Jan xx
Cunningham Avatar
June 21, 2018 at 5:52 PM
Wow what a twist at the end, I was on her side but now feel sorry for him. Great write Jan and good luck. Tom
Allison Avatar
June 21, 2018 at 6:06 PM
I do love stepping over to the dark side from time to time lol:-) hugs jan xx
Nance Avatar
June 21, 2018 at 4:46 PM
Wow that is good! Jealousy, murder, oooh the plot that builds, you should be a soap opera writer!
Allison Avatar
June 21, 2018 at 4:52 PM
lol Cas, I am amazed where I get these ideas from but the words made me dig deep for something different to humour, its great to go to the dark side lol:-) hugs Jan xx
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