The Betrayal of Love Last Forever

The Betrayal of Love Last Forever Someone other than me has held you I knew Some one other than me has touched you Has seen you And though I have never entered on this betrayal Still I loved you Someone has tasted what was mine Someone other than me Has invaded this singular gift of love And left this rape in my heart To remind me That only I have seen What I have seen But not only I have been Where I have been Naked in your naked arms His caresses on your skin Are scratches in my head Never healing And somewhere you’re combined and heavy breathing Creates a choke And a rip in my mind Though forgiving has long since brought its balm And heeling has extended me Her gentle tending calm To think that I new him and he new me And to think you were both so ready Fires a passage through my thoughts An unbidden spasm of mental cramp And I love you now as I ever did But I find I have not forgotten Through all these years The hurt still echoes An aching ghost in my throat And still I love you Yet there is no test for the endurance of that love There are no words To describe well enough What you meant to me And what you did to me So I would rather not have Than have to live dishonestly I don’t think you will ever know What your confessions destroyed in me I don’t think you will ever understand The blood in the scar of that memory So truth is better for the honesty And a lie is a patch which peels eventually I loved you And am and was incapable of anything else And I know what love involves But I hate the reminder and its memory And I am glad of the time And for the time That never brought you back to me I loved you I am in love with you Perhaps more than I choose to be Perhaps more than is and was good for me