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Sun-kissed Silhouettes - First Draft

Upon her last sighs, she narrates cosmic sagas flowing within poetic veins. She still remembers those idyllic evenings, engrossed in raining confessions, influenced by her shipwrecked heart, expressing scarlet sentiments that sail in silence, across unruffled ink-stained waves, amidst the endless oceans between their untouched silhouettes. Her every desire to reunite and cast away midnight blues, float within perfumed love notes written by the silky seashore, placed in crystalline bottles of timeless lyrics, that shall be carried through estuaries that lead her to his sacred island with everlasting roses~ where pearlized shells reflect saline left as tropical memories of tomorrow with him by her sun-kissed innocence.

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Duke Beaufort

Date: 2/11/2024 10:05:00 AM

Thinking poems can go out and reach someone special is a very romantic thought--that it can somehow make things right. Hopefully, expressing our thoughts makes us right with our feelings and provides resolution. Same with our actions. This is so thought provoking. When I see "first draft" as part of a title, I often think of another part of existence (like an afterlife or better still--a new phase of behavior). It fits perfectly into what you have done here. I am somewhat awestruck by it.

Valsa George

Date: 2/11/2024 12:34:00 AM

"Her every desire to reunite and cast away midnight blues, float within perfumed love notes written by the silky seashore, placed in crystalline bottles of timeless lyrics, that shall be carried through estuaries" This exploration into the mind of disturbed thoughts longing to establish the lost connection once more is beautifully delineated in impeccable style. This doesn't look like a first draft. I feel it has no scope for further improvement. "her shipwrecked heart, expressing scarlet sentiments that sail in silence, across unruffled ink-stained waves," Wow, so beautiful dear EMPRESS

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:16:00 AM

Awwn dear valsa im forever grateful for your kind and generous support truly thank you so much for the detailed analysis and love youv shown through your sincere feedback. I am grateful, i wrote this for a prompt on instagram, it is written in few mins and is a first draft but well, i never ever posted it ah thank u so very much for your support once again

Silent One

Date: 2/10/2024 8:56:00 AM

I do not know the concept for this contest, but your first draft looks like the finished article.. The poem's exploration of desire and reunion is woven through with imagery of perfumed love notes and crystalline bottles, symbols of hope and longing that bridge the distance between past and present, memory and reality. The imagery of "pearlized shells" and "tropical memories" paints a picture of a paradise lost and yearned for, where love's innocence is bathed in the warmth of the sun.

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:18:00 AM

Ah thank you so much, for your sincere and heartfelt feedback, uv understood the poem very well dear silent one. I found the contest interesting, however i wasnt expecting to win. Its rather a bigger win when so many appreciate my poem especially you! Thank you again

Silent One
Date: 2/10/2024 8:57:00 AM

poem is a testament to the enduring power of love and the resilience of the human spirit in the face of longing and loss. It invites readers to journey with the narrator through the depths of emotion, where every word is imbued with the weight of memory and the promise of tomorrow's embrace.. Best of luck in the contest dear..

Hiya Sharma

Date: 2/9/2024 10:49:00 PM

Gosh, my dear sweet Ink! Your 'first draft' is absolutely enchanting and eloquent in its poetic richness and depth.. Your heart truly bleeds charismatic phrases and none of the lines that you weave can ever be less than an artistic painting, worthy of admiration. "float within perfumed love notes written by the silky seashore" Oh my, this is such a heartfelt poem..where vulnerability of the soul is depicted so effortlessly, knitted behind metaphors.. That opening line made me somewhat emotional

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:19:00 AM

Awwn thank you so very much for taking time to read and leave your heartfelt feedback, im truly grateful always for your kind and sincere support

Hiya Sharma
Date: 2/9/2024 10:50:00 PM

"where pearlized shells reflect saline left as tropical memories of tomorrow with him by sun-kissed innocence" Absolutely stunning! The imagery, feelings, adjectives.. Ahh, everything is beyond profound and soul-stirring here.. Keep writing and shining always!

Paige Hind

Date: 2/9/2024 12:47:00 PM

"where pearlized shells reflect saline left as tropical memories of tomorrow with him by her sun-kissed innocence"-this is genius. Salt from shells as memories...sand is so mass and numberless. Beautiful work. Love and light!

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:19:00 AM

Awwn thank you so very much truly dear paige

Deb M

Date: 2/9/2024 5:29:00 AM

WOW sweet Ink….your words took me away to a very beautiful place full of wonderful sights ….a magical dreamlike write!! Debx

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:19:00 AM

Awwn thank you that means alot coming from you sweet debx

Yann Rolland

Date: 2/9/2024 12:54:00 AM

this is beautiful, and the poem, is needed , as we wait for long summers, enjoyed the images, the perfumes, the feelings of the poem, great reading, thanks poet

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:20:00 AM

Thank you so very much for your kind and generous feedback truly

Hilda Greenhough

Date: 2/8/2024 9:09:00 PM

I enjoyed this poem . Deep thought and beautiful scenery denoted a poem of final conclusions.

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:20:00 AM

wwn thank you so very much truly

Bill Baker

Date: 2/8/2024 2:52:00 PM

A FAV for my list, my dear Inky. Your words are so enchanting and flow smoothly as I read your poetry. The whole second verse was filled with desire and beautiful imagery. Thanks for sharing your soulful poetry with us, Inky. Love and Light Bill

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:21:00 AM

Ah thank you dear bill i appreciate your support truly

Tonye George

Date: 2/8/2024 1:23:00 PM

"Engrossed in raining confessions" who doesn't love a great love poem? Finesse at it's height Ink.

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:22:00 AM

Ah so good to hear from you poetic soul, i hope you are ok. Thank you so much for leaving your heartfelt feedback on this

Tom Woody
Date: 2/10/2024 5:50:00 AM

Hello Tonye

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 2/8/2024 1:18:00 PM

well, I doubt you will have to do a rewrite on this one. I guess I need to get a move-on if I want to enter this contest. Thanks so much for my win in your last contest. I bet you will get a win with this gem you wrote.

Sotto Poet

Date: 2/8/2024 12:46:00 PM

This composition exudes profound beauty, skillfully employing alliteration and vivid imagery, dear Ink. It is an impeccable initial rendition, evoking the captivating concept of shipwrecked hearts and sentiments gracefully traversing through silence. Your storytelling prowess is truly awe-inspiring, touching the depths of countless hearts and souls, and resonating on a transcendental plane. Best of luck in the upcoming contest!

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:25:00 AM

Thank you so much dr sotto, sometimes its not about winning in contests its about expressing and supporting other contests. Which im glad i do if i think my work will not be laughed at

Mike Gentile

Date: 2/8/2024 7:33:00 AM

Even your "first draft" is exquisite Ink Empress! Poetic yearning expressed so eloquently in lines so very full of rich imagery! Looks like a winner to me! Happy Thursday xxoo

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:26:00 AM

Ah thank you so much mike im grateful for your support truly

Vijay Pandit

Date: 2/8/2024 4:59:00 AM

Splendid as always, my friend. Reads like a poem from the heart--first draft or not.

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:27:00 AM

Thank you dear vijay always for your kind support

John Lawless

Date: 2/8/2024 4:35:00 AM

WOW....I angled you didn't "dodge the draft" ... this held me and mesmerized my tiny mind leading it on a wondrous exploration...Beautifully done

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:27:00 AM

Thank you dear john, yes i had it saved hoping oneday ill post it somewhere but never did. Im so glad you liked it grateful truly

Abdullah Alhemaidy

Date: 2/8/2024 4:03:00 AM

Very beautiful read! Bless her :-) Best wishes lovely Ink Empress ~AA

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:28:00 AM

Thank you so much

Victor Buhagiar

Date: 2/8/2024 3:57:00 AM

Soon I'll die and after meeting my sweet wife I will search for your mother and together we will engross ourselves on the lovely poems you write.

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:28:00 AM

Thats sad to read dear victor . Thank you so much for your support

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 2/8/2024 2:29:00 AM

- A delightful text ... so beautifully romantic ... like a dream, Ink :) - hugs

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:28:00 AM

Awn thank you so much dear anne Lise

Karen Jones

Date: 2/8/2024 12:48:00 AM

I love shipwrecked heart and sentiments that sail in silence. This is deep and beautiful with lovely alliteration and imagery! A perfect first draft! Good luck in the contest!

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:29:00 AM

Awwn thank you so much dear karen im grateful for your support always

The Aura Rhymes

Date: 2/8/2024 12:44:00 AM

Beautiful …. It was magical .,

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:29:00 AM

Thank you dahlin

Lioness Onpaper

Date: 2/8/2024 12:43:00 AM

narrates cosmic sagas flowing within poetic veins… ooo the elements in the opening line!! expressing scarlet sentiments that sail in silence, mmm mysterious!!! placed in crystal bottles of timeless lyrics, that shall be carried through estuaries that lead her to his sacred island with everlasting roses.. mmm that line!! Gorgeous beyond imagination .. this is a perfect piece of art I’d frame in the living room.. damn papi look at u making magic with these extraordinary lines!!!

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:30:00 AM

Awwn papi u da best

Fading Star Silence

Date: 2/8/2024 12:39:00 AM

Ahhh the beauty and grace of your ink truly astounds me, my beautiful soul sis! I just can’t get enough of the breathtaking tales you weave..reaching so many hearts and souls..resonating on a whole other level! I always resonate with your words..always speaking my soul language! But the way you weave..the imagery, diction..that only you could so effortlessly and flawlessly ink! “Scarlet sentiments that sail in silence” “unruffled ink stained waves”..who would think to pen such ethereal lines??

Ink Empress
Date: 2/11/2024 7:31:00 AM

Thank you so very much my beautiful soul sis i am so grateful for your sincere and generous feedback always and you always see beauty in everything i write! For that im truly grateful

Fading Star Silence
Date: 2/8/2024 12:42:00 AM

“Endless oceans between their untouched silhouettes” “float within perfumed love notes” gosh..you can truly weave magic in such diversity! “Placed in crystal bottles of timeless lyrics” true artistry in your lines and verses! You are truly one of my favorite poets and I will always be mesmerized by your poetry. The perfect end to this divine masterpiece!