Stupid New Year's Resolutions

  My (Stupid) Resolutions For 2017

1. Lose 20 pounds and prepare to finance a whole new wardrobe.
When eating ask yourself, would a healthy person eat this and
what to heck is- Red Dye #2, and malotextrin disodoium anyways?

2. Quite drinking coffee and coke, okay just delete this one right now!

3.  Make more money, as per, The Secret, just BELIEVE, believe, believe
     and say "make more money" out loud 500+ TIMES per day. Right!

4.  Get out of debt, okay just delete this one too!

5.  Discover why I was born and what am I suppose to be doing?? 
     (Didn't I try this last year?) Okay, just meditate each day and see 
      what happens.

6. Which brings me to - Don't do the same stupid things I did
    last year. Oh, why not just print out last years resolutions and
    save some time. Time is ticking, tocking away!

7.  Carry dental floss everywhere. Simple. Make the dentist happy.

8.  I resolve to come up with a stronger password than Kitty1

9.  Stop making spelling errors and find the dictionary buried under books.

10.  Again, I will pray daily for a fatter bank account and a thinner body
      and pray that God does not get those two mixed up. 

11.  Stop making stupid lists and learn to COUNT.

12.  ?

______________________________________
December 15, 2016


Poetry/Free Verse/Stupid New Year's Resolutions
Copyright Protected, ID 16-858-293-0
All Rights Reserved.  Written under Pseudonym.

funnyfree verse

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