Stuck in My Gut - Gross Limericks

My boyfriend was agitated Because I was constipated We'd be late for the game Of course I was to blame My butt hole's not dialated On and on he whined and waited Use of laxatives, debated In my gut it was stuck I could smell it... oh yuck Boyfriend getting more frustrated I could hear the game on the phone I said, "Go. Just leave me alone!" But he didn't hear me His team was up by three Stomach hurt, I let out a moan Half hour later, he was snoring I guess the game must be boring I still sat on the can Cursing my boyfriend, Dan Who was no longer adoring. After being lubricated I sighed at being elated Although my butt was sore I had to poop no more My bowels had been vacated I found Dan's note and shook my head "I had to poop, so went home instead of waiting for you, Sue. After this, we are through!" That's exactly what his note said. I felt relief, more ways than one Happy that Dan and I were done Now I can be alone When sitting on my throne No one shouting, "Hurry up, Hun!!"