School Dinners

The prime objective of school dinners Must have been to make them taste as awful as possible Too runny or to thick Aesthetically disgusting And the result was they make you gag and sick. The screwed up faces in the dining hall Said it all But you were made to eat it by our ever watchful Captures And had no choice at all. The mashed potatoes were like cement And I'd never seen green carrots before The sausages must have been made of sawdust Picked up off the floor. The gravy was always full of lumps The tea cakes fill of flies Every term they'd be a few less of us And it was rumoured that they'd be poisoned and died. Desert was no better The trifle was like a bowl of sick The cookies were so hard they'd break your teeth And you had to chip away at them with a pick. Tapioca pudding we called it frog spawn Or jellied eyes I once put some in a teachers brief case And when he opened it he got a big surprise. It was like some dark scene from the movie Oliver But no one ever asked for more They were to busy being sick Behind the toilet door' Still as the saying goes, ''School days are the best days of our lives''.