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The prime objective of school dinners
Must have been to make them taste as awful as possible
Too runny or to thick
Aesthetically disgusting 
And the result was they make you gag and sick.

The screwed up faces in the dining hall
Said it all
But you were made to eat it by our ever watchful
Captures
And had no choice at all.

The mashed potatoes were like cement
And I'd never seen green carrots before
The sausages must have been made of sawdust
Picked up off the floor.

The gravy was always full of lumps
The tea cakes fill of flies
Every term they'd be a few less of us
And it was rumoured that they'd be poisoned and died.

Desert was no better
The trifle was like a bowl of sick
The cookies were so hard they'd break your teeth
And you had to chip away at them with a pick.

Tapioca pudding we called it frog spawn
Or jellied eyes
I once put some in a teachers brief case
And when he opened it he got a big surprise.

It was like some dark scene from the movie
Oliver But no one ever asked for more
They were to busy being sick
Behind the toilet door'

Still as the saying goes, ''School days are the best days of our lives''.

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