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Refurbished Nursery Rhymes: Peter Piper's Peculiar Pepper Patch

"Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers…"

Every time I hear a kid recite this twisted rhyme,
I'm 'minded how 'gainst Mother Nature it's a crime.
What that peck of peppers was no one can tell,
Perhaps banana, jalapeño, cherry, bell.
But whate'er they were, it's plain, at least to me,
That such a peck as that came off no bush nor tree.
For years this simple nursery flaw 
Has scraped, and scoured, and rubbed me raw,
And in my very craw the thing's been sticking.
So to bring the problem up to date,
And to try and set the record straight,
I've checked with Vlasik, Clausen, Kraft,
And all agree the notion's daft
That peppers can be pickled prior to picking.

Author's note: Of course, there could have been a typo in the original manuscript, and Peter actually "packed a peck of pickled peppers", or maybe Peter, himself, was partially "pickled" when he picked 'em.

Entered in Tom Woody's Nursery Rhyme Wackiness Poetry Contest on July 16, 2024.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2023

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Dietrich Avatar
July 21, 2024 at 10:26 AM
Cool way to do the contest. Congrats
Slaughter Avatar
July 21, 2024 at 10:35 AM
Andrea, thanks a "peck"...
Woods Avatar
July 21, 2024 at 8:05 AM
Wow of all the times I've heard it said this rhyme I never caught that flaw! You worded this perfectly as an old mother goose rhyme would sound I think...and bought out the mistake with humor! Xo
Slaughter Avatar
July 21, 2024 at 10:19 AM
Thanks, Crystol. Amazing, isn't it, how easy it was, back in our childhood days, to take these things at face value.
Empress Avatar
July 20, 2024 at 10:49 PM
This is a clever one, love the wordplay and how youv delivered it too. Pleasure reading this, Brilliant! Congratulations on your win
Slaughter Avatar
July 21, 2024 at 10:17 AM
I E. thanks. I really enjoy writing these, and this one is one of my personal favorites.
George Avatar
July 20, 2024 at 3:13 PM
Congratulations on your win Jim.
Slaughter Avatar
July 21, 2024 at 10:16 AM
Thank you, Tonye.
Baker Avatar
August 11, 2023 at 3:58 PM
Creative and clever thou art, Jim. A fine and entertaining poem to read, my friend. I especially enjoyed the author's note. Well done! Write On! A poet friend in Texas, Bill
Slaughter Avatar
August 12, 2023 at 10:38 AM
Thanks, Bill. And I wasn't a bit "pickled" when I tackled this one.
Daniel Avatar
August 8, 2023 at 8:36 PM
Clever, I never thought of it that way, well done, Jim:)
Slaughter Avatar
August 9, 2023 at 10:52 AM
Thanks, Joanna.
Dietrich Avatar
August 8, 2023 at 4:21 PM
haha. I agree with Laura here. Very witty.
Slaughter Avatar
August 9, 2023 at 10:53 AM
Andrea, thanks.
Leiser Avatar
August 8, 2023 at 1:41 PM
Your witty poem is both brilliant and hilarious at the same time, Jim! Very entertaining and enjoyable! :)
Slaughter Avatar
August 9, 2023 at 10:53 AM
Wow! two for one...I'll take it! Thank you, Laura. Glad you enjoyed it.
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