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Reaching Deepest Oceans

My beloved How far will I love you As far as where moons immerse in deep seas Beyond the edge of a tide's crimson hue Where your breath fills my sails with soft zephyr breeze Lone I embark to our promised land Across borders of secret pain Under still stars,above drifting sand through anchored shadows of rain Oh foreign eyes,but never distant Your arms'safe harbour of a long embrace Two souls entwined,two hearts persistent Beneath night's sky,my lips outline your face Water rise, water falls between shores and time Empty spaces still abhore our love,sweet tender and sublime

Copyright © | Year Posted 2015




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Date: 5/7/2015 3:16:00 PM
Let's look at synonyms for beloved (the word is not commonly used in the 21st century & takes most readers right to Browning in comparison which we don't want.)-darling, dear, dearest, precious, adored, much loved, cherished, treasured). FAR is an unusual word to use in a measurment of love? Do you mean will distance affect the depth of your love? Line 3 consider a synonym for immerse-submerge, dip, dunk, duck, sink, plunge; soak, drench, saturate, marinate, wet, douse, souse, steep
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Charmaine Chircop
Date: 5/8/2015 1:03:00 AM
Your input was helpful and useful,thanks.My poem is now revised,if you want to see it,Its Workshop Reaching Deepest Oceans poem : ),thanks ma.
Date: 5/7/2015 3:05:00 PM
Ok #1 my honey you drive me nuts with the double spacing, there's no need for it UNLESS there is ex: between verses OR for emphasis #2 just so you know love poems unless asked for &/or are very unique are VERY out of favor - OK we have a love poem to make UNIQUE - you see - you would have to beat this to be unique- How do I love thee? Let me count the ways./I love thee to the depth and breadth and height/My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight/For the ends of being and ideal grace.
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Charmaine Chircop
Date: 5/7/2015 3:49:00 PM
Oki!!! Spacing will be removed,Beloved can be exchanged,and immersed no no ?Ok.Re love poems,I know they're out of favour if not uniquely written,So lets see what's to be done.Thanks for your input Deb : )
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Debbie Guzzi
Date: 5/7/2015 3:06:00 PM
How Do I Love Thee? (Sonnet 43) Elizabeth Barrett Browning, 1806 - 1861
Date: 2/26/2015 11:46:00 AM
The words sing their presence off the page and carry the emotional flow, a beautiful read that stands out and begs to be read. Emile. #7
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Date: 2/4/2015 11:17:00 AM
Beautifully written with an explicit craft shown as obvious as the scorching sun. Great piece, a wonderful share and a blessed read.
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Date: 1/30/2015 1:01:00 AM
A most heartfelt verse. What a glorious, beautiful poem.. I am impressed..."Empty spaces still abhore our love,sweet tender and sublime "Such lines of tenderness throughout. Absolutely stunning! Always, Laura
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Date: 1/28/2015 8:00:00 AM
This is an awesome and wonderful poem. Its nice spending some time here.. It feels so quality and deserving. Great pen friend
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Date: 1/28/2015 7:44:00 AM
beautifully painted imaginary charmaine excellent pen dear friend
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Date: 1/26/2015 6:24:00 PM
I see I have missed a few, what a treat to read your words Charmaine!
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Date: 1/26/2015 10:05:00 AM
this enchants me as your lines flow with the finest images of romance, charms... much enjoyed!.. huggs
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Date: 1/25/2015 4:14:00 PM
GORGEOUS!!! You have a way with words! You had me from the first line... love and joy! Jack XXX
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Date: 1/25/2015 12:43:00 PM
Beautiful imagery and nice description... good pen Charmaine... #7 lov,nad!
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Date: 1/25/2015 11:35:00 AM
Beneath night's sky,my lips outline your face...I loved your poem..emotive Charm.Love>rajat
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Date: 1/25/2015 9:20:00 AM
I'm with Tim.[Beyond the edge of a tide's crimson hue] fav line Light & Love
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Date: 1/25/2015 7:05:00 AM
-where your breath fills my sails with soft zephyr breeze- wonderful descriptive lines, you softly play lonely and wanting in a beautiful way with your words. nicely done. hugs xx
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Date: 1/25/2015 4:38:00 AM
Romanticism interwoven with love! Excellent dear, Charmaine!
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Date: 1/25/2015 1:09:00 AM
You dance with words, Charma...You make them obey your, my sweet...I don't know how...but expression that are lost to me come so easily to you. "Through anchored shadows of pain." Amazing.
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Date: 1/24/2015 7:52:00 PM
Tender amour.. Don't mistake the strength of her pull. Steady sails pushed by a soft breeze finds love's fate.. Irrestibly fabulous, Charm!
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Date: 1/24/2015 7:24:00 PM
Beautifully romantic Charma:-) Hugs jan x
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Date: 1/24/2015 7:17:00 PM
Charming Charma charms again...I NEVER grow tired of reading poems by The Queen of Romance. Favorite line among many: 'Across borders of secret pain'... Oh yes indeed. He's a lucky man and I hope he knows it...Much love to you dear lady - Tim
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Date: 1/24/2015 4:56:00 PM
How romantic...such beautiful and loving words....to have one's lips outline his face...a favourite... Hugs Tim
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