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Please Pull Up a Chair

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Dear Becca I’d love to pull up a chair But I don’t have a moment to spare I’m exhausted, just look I’m deadbeat I wish god gave me ten pairs of feet I slave for you all night and day For a miserly five dollars of pay I serve food just as fast as I can But you really just don’t give a damn! I slop down bowls of lupin juice soup Its consistency looks like blue poop I deposit bowls with a wry smile Because I know that it tastes really vile! The customers, oh they can be SO rude They say hurry up Frank with our food They’ll order plates of pink slimy frogs (I have to prise frogs off blue moldy logs) Pink frogs are a specialty of the house Served on rice with a head of a mouse Folks demand jugs of curlique beer It starts cloudy and then it turns clear For dessert diners love snail cream pie It’s served with live snails piled high The snails crawl all over the table I retrieve them if customers aren't unable BUT I’m your husband you treat me like dirt You stand smiling whilst I do the hard work So I really don’t have time to sit In fact stuff your job honey - I QUIT! Please pull up a chair Contest sponsored by Jerry Curtis 05~01~17

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Roy Pett

Date: 5/5/2017 4:06:00 AM

Absolutely brilliant Jan, clever, imaginative, funny, inspirational, but most of all so entertaining to read, A 7 and fav, good luck in contest.

Jan Allison
Date: 5/7/2017 8:57:00 AM

Thanks Roy there are to be only a few winners in the contest so the competition will be stiff:-) hugs Jan xx

Lisa Ricci

Date: 5/3/2017 1:19:00 PM

Good Afternoon Jan. I can't thank you enough for the smile and chuckle of this entry. Honestly. This was wonderful fun and play. You delivered a great scene to follow along. Good luck with the contest. Well done

Jan Allison
Date: 5/3/2017 6:20:00 PM

I think I've already seen the winner - will have to wait and see what jerry thinks of my effort lol:-) thanks for the visit Lisa:-) hugs Jan xx

Kim Rodrigues

Date: 5/3/2017 10:22:00 AM

Great one, Jan!

Jan Allison
Date: 5/3/2017 11:36:00 AM

Thanks Kim:-) hugs Jan xx

Paul Callus

Date: 5/2/2017 12:36:00 PM

Hilarious and imaginative, Jan. Overworked and underpaid....it's a wonder he stuck it out that long! Hugs // paul

Jan Allison
Date: 5/2/2017 12:38:00 PM

I hope Jerry likes it I had such fun writing for the contest inspired by Becca's poem:-) hugs Jan xx

Joanna Daniel

Date: 5/2/2017 9:33:00 AM

Ha ha, love your response to the poem, Jan:) I would never think of eating anything in that place:)!!!

Jan Allison
Date: 5/2/2017 12:27:00 PM

Nor me Jo lol I am amazed where these ideas come from I guess the creativity has been hidden for so many years it is bursting into my head with these crazy ideas:-) hugs Jan xx

Connie Marcum Wong

Date: 5/1/2017 6:29:00 PM

This poem is so creative Jan. It really shows your talent in the menu you share. I would never want to eat there! I can imagine kids reading this and really laughing. A brilliant entry Jan! 7 ; )

Jan Allison
Date: 5/2/2017 1:06:00 AM

Thanks Connie I have learned so so much since I started writing and joined soup in Feb 2013 - I am amazed as I never showed any signs of creativity until then:-) hugs Jan xx

Joseph May

Date: 5/1/2017 4:53:00 PM

Lol..I'll pass on the specialty of the house..Nicely done Jan

Jan Allison
Date: 5/1/2017 5:01:00 PM

lol thanks Joseph If I worked there I'd quit too lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 5/1/2017 3:08:00 PM

Jan, you did this perfectly!!! I would do it, but yup!! I kind of doubt it! I think Becca's is a great one to get inspiration from!!

Jan Allison
Date: 5/1/2017 3:27:00 PM

Becca's poem was a great prompt for the contest theme. I never had Dr Seuss books as a child but my Aunty Margaret had the 'Cat in the hat' and I remember reading that but I have to admit they have never appealed until I started writing:-) hugs jan xx

Lin Lane

Date: 5/1/2017 2:28:00 PM

If ANYONE ever doubted your ability to write something other than poopy limericks they'll change their mindset after reading this one. Besides, you've certainly proven your ability to show serious emotion many times. I especially loved the ending. I would've quit, too.

Jan Allison
Date: 5/1/2017 3:25:00 PM

Aww thanks Lin:-) I have learned so so much since I joined soup and I will never alter my style and write simple poems that are easy for people to understand and I hope I have brought a bit of fun to soup - I sure have so much fun writing:-) hugs Jan xx

Chris Green

Date: 5/1/2017 10:46:00 AM

This was funny Jan. I did read Rebecca's poem a while back but may have to go find it again. Best wishes in the contest oh and can I get a glass of the curlique beer before you clock out for the final time?

Jan Allison
Date: 5/1/2017 1:37:00 PM

Rebecca's poem was fabulous:-) We never had Dr Seuss books in our house I did read the cat in the hat at my aunts but that was it as far as Dr Seuss goes:-) hugs Jan xx