Obsolete

Henry (call me Harry) took some cash for a new book We’ve just obtained a draft and so we’re gonna take a look It looks like a companion to his current book called ‘Spare’ In which the loathsome hypocrite has mocked his brother’s hair Chapter one tells all about his alien abduction It wasn’t the cocaine (for it was family corruption) It must be said although he’s dead that Philip was a gangster And Harry says he lost his mind when Daddy ate his hamster He says for years he called the queen his grandpa, not his gran Because when he was little Grandma Queenie was a man And then on one occasion at his girlfriend’s meet n greet He claims his brother snubbed her when he didn’t kiss her feet Theres more to see in chapter three ’bout losing his virginity “She was mature with such allure, we shared a brief affinity” He met her at the morgue and so he called her Chilly Jilly They kept her in a freezer… he got frostbite on his willy In chapter four he went to war and won it by himself So he deserves the crown and the entire royal wealth For all his army buddies sat around and didn’t help His thousand golden bullets caused the enemy to yelp So it’s a book of lies and gossip; some you’ve read before But I just cannot steal myself to read you any more This follow up to ‘Spare’ it seems is still quite incomplete As yet it has no title, so let’s call it ‘OBSOLETE’. * And we've just heard that Meghan’s gonna write her memoirs too We understand the working title will be ‘Harry Who?’