Connie Marcum Wong | + Follow Poet |
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Night Terrors

How silly for me to fear going to sleep
when I need sleep so much.
The intensity of fearful thoughts 
consumes me, and I just can't sleep.
When pure exhaustion overcomes me 
I drift off and pray that this night 
will be different....will be night terror free.
Free from my terrifying screams that 
shake me awake.

That darkness, those in my face other 
worldly creatures I can't quite discern
which cause my night terrors, plague me.
My screams leave my throat hoarse, leave
my body trembling, and heart pounding.
Then I lie awake in fitful tossing and turning 
until daylight breaks.
I have no conscious fears to reflect upon,
no reasons for my nocturnal fright.

Yet it happens almost every night.
Doctors haven't given me any useful advice.
Meditation, prayers, leaving the lights on
when I sleep have come to no avail.
My bedroom has been, sage smudged, 
reiked, incensed and God blessed.
Angel protection seems to work the best.
Yet still these night terrors persist.
Psychoanalysis, and hypnosis hasn't helped.

I feel like the little child who keeps crying wolf,
who will one day scream, then be ignored by
family who have become used to my screams.
As yet I have not met another who suffers
with night terrors but I am searching for a group
to join of kindred souls who comprehend what
I am dealing with, who may also suggest
a way to end these frightful terrors for my sanity.
Until I find a way, I won't give up. I still have faith.

8-8-17

*Note:
Night terrors are a form of sleep disorder in which a person partially awakens from sleep in a state of terror. A sufferer of night terrors experiences an activation of his or her fight-or-flight system.
Night terrors usually occur during the deepest stage of sleep, which is typically the first half of the sleep cycle. Night terrors are not nightmares, which are a form of dreaming. Because the person may still be partially asleep during a night terror, they can be inconsolable and unaware of their surroundings. They may have no memory of the episode when they awaken.

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Vladislav Raven Date: 1/9/2019 9:52:00 AM Hi Connie, it really saddens me that you go through these night terrors. Your words express this subject so well. It is good to know that you are looking for some way to deal with this affliction. It must be a terrible thing Connie. Prayers going up for you that you find a solution to deal with things. Have a wonderful wednesday. hugs....Mike. XX Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 1/9/2019 11:11:00 PM These night terrors have subsided for now. I believe they were brought on by stress. My husband was very ill and I was so worried I would lose him. He is doing better now. Thank you for caring my friend. xxoo

Lynn Marie Date: 8/25/2017 12:06:00 AM I feel for you Connie and the part of "sage smudged, reiked, incensed..." is relatable to me in seeking solutions which many also do not understand which sadly can add to the feeling of aloneness in suffering. You have articulated this wonderfully and it will surely help others in understanding what is not seen. I smile at the last line, it is your beautiful spirit in words. I wish you every success in your search for answers and support. xo Login to Reply

Barry Stebbings Date: 8/21/2017 6:14:00 AM Very sorry you are feeling so distressed, Connie. I have no experience of this but sometimes these things resolve themselves. Best Wishes, Barry Login to Reply

Gary Bateman Date: 8/14/2017 12:00:00 PM Hello Connie, Your verse here captivated my thoughts very much. I'm so sorry to hear of your affliction with this sleep disorder. "Stress" may indeed play a central role in this as you've alluded to below. Be sure to take care of yourself!! I hope you can find a solution soon and have peace of mind, and better nights of sleep in the future. You are in my and Ingrid's thoughts and prayers!! Get Well and keep writing. We all need the wisdom and magic of your fine poetry!! Best!! Gary Login to Reply

Harry Horsman Date: 8/11/2017 9:20:00 AM This is amazing poetry Connie, yes scary but i wonder if this like other fears and stress, helps to develop the foundation to our poetry? Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/11/2017 3:07:00 PM Thank you so much Harry. : )

Nette Onclaud Date: 8/10/2017 3:41:00 PM ohh, the alpha state, connie... perhaps, you had a recurring childhood experience that still needs to surface... you'll be fine; hynopsis works!.. this is a remarkable, intimate read!..huggs Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/11/2017 2:39:00 PM Thank you very much Nette. ; )

Ravi Sathasivam Date: 8/10/2017 6:55:00 AM Excellent write. So sad to hear you have to deal with this night after night. Hope you will over come this problems soon. Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/11/2017 2:38:00 PM Thank you Ravi. This past week it has been better. I know that stress has a lot to do with it and I am working on a solution. I appreciate your kind remarks. ; )

M. L. Kiser Date: 8/9/2017 10:03:00 PM These are horrid; they can be experience related; mine were and daily dreamwork helped a great deal. I've learned to turn them around and make good from the bad; write them in poetry or journal; it doesn't matter, just get them out of you, look at them and know that they are no longer inside; burn or shred them if you must, but get them out. Well done; best to you. Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/10/2017 12:45:00 AM Thank you for your understanding and support M.L. I appreciate it. It has been better lately after I had surgery. I am sure it is stress related. I am working on it. I am sorry you have had to deal with them too. : )

Winged Warrior Date: 8/9/2017 6:48:00 PM My dear Connie...hopefully you can overcome this disorder...I shall say a prayer for you, my friend...great write and god bless...^WW^ Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/10/2017 12:47:00 AM Thank you very much h ^WW^. I would appreciate that very much. : )

Vijay Pandit Date: 8/9/2017 7:19:00 AM Thanks for highlighting this suffering Connie--it touches the heart! Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/10/2017 12:16:00 AM I am working on it Vijay. Past week has been better. Thank you my friend! : )

Maria Williams Date: 8/9/2017 5:59:00 AM I was quite saddened to read this Connie. I really hope it will stop soon, but it does look like it might be stress related? I will send you something that might just work, its definitely worth a try.I dont suffer from this condition, though the link I'll send to you definitely works for stress.Your poem is so poignant and well written. Will send it on you normal email address...Maria Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/10/2017 12:17:00 AM Thank you so much for your support Maria. I really appreciate it. : )

Paul Callus Date: 8/9/2017 3:24:00 AM Thank God I do not have to suffer such terrible nights, Connie....I feel so sorry for you and others who go through this. I believe that stress and taking on yourself the problems of those close to you are the main causes. It could also be a backdated traumatic experience which is still deeply rooted, though considered a closed one. Your positive outlook and search for remedies are already part of the solution. Regards // paul Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/9/2017 4:28:00 PM Your theory is right on Paul. I believe this too. I am working on ridding myself of the disorder. I do think stress is the cause. Worrying about my husband's health etc. Today is his birthday. We are taking him out to his favorite restaurant for lunch. Thank you for your insightful comment my friend. My poem is not a bid for sympathy...simply a reality I know others suffer with too. ; )

Pashang Salehi Date: 8/9/2017 1:32:00 AM Wow, this is scary Connie... I offer you this website... do the cut and paste. http://www.parents.com/kids/sleep/issues/nightmares-steps-to-stop-scary-dreams/ Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/9/2017 4:28:00 PM Thank you very much Pashang. I will certainly check it out. : )

Russell Sivey Date: 8/8/2017 10:13:00 PM I have heard of this but never experienced it so I can't really fully understand what it's like, but it sounds so terrible...I'm so sorry you go through this, and everybody else that has, I'm awfully sorry you suffer! This poem says a lot within its verse, very well constructed Connie, Great Work!! Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/8/2017 10:59:00 PM Thank you Russell. I will find a solution. ; )

Old Man Emu Date: 8/8/2017 10:06:00 PM Wow Connie, that was a nasty read, (at first) Depicted it very well. I have suffered this incursion for many years, I actually wrote a poem with the same title as yours some time ago, but obviously not as well constructed as this. Thanks for sharing I did like the poem though. Kind regards, Craig Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/8/2017 10:55:00 PM I appreciate you sharing that with me Craig. I feel for you. Soupmail me if you have found a way to stop them. I will do the same. Thank you, Connie : )

Akkina Downing Date: 8/8/2017 7:34:00 PM Oh gosh, that's horrible, I felt sad for you. I have a brother who used to sleepwalking, thanks God he outgrew it. But I do pray you'll get better and sleep with only beautiful dreams... big hug miss Connie :) Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/8/2017 8:29:00 PM Thank you Akkina. Thank you for sharing that. : )

Lin Lane Date: 8/8/2017 6:57:00 PM Oh Connie, I'm so sad to hear you have to deal with this night after night. I hope you will find a way to end this torture and soon. Hugs. Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/8/2017 8:17:00 PM If I am under a lot of stress, they get worse but I am learning ways to help. Thank you Lin. : )

Sunlite Wanter Date: 8/8/2017 6:29:00 PM I, too, know what they're like - I think we each develop techniques through the years to combat them. Thanks for writing about this and letting folks get out of denial and know they are not alone. Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/8/2017 8:05:00 PM I am learning ways that help. Thank you Sunlite. : )

Heidi Sands Date: 8/8/2017 6:11:00 PM I wish for them to lessen for you Connie :) Login to Reply

Tim Smith Date: 8/8/2017 6:06:00 PM I'm sorry you have to go through those Connie. Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/8/2017 8:03:00 PM I am dealing with them better. Meditation and the angels help. Thank you Tim. : )

Heidi Sands Date: 8/8/2017 5:26:00 PM Hi Connie. I know all to well what night terrors are like. It took a lot of positive affirmations and 'safety writing' to help slow mine down. Although, I have never been completely free of them. It is much less than years ago. I also had to work through quite a bit with where they were stemming from. This writing about it is excellent. Take care. Login to Reply Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/8/2017 5:55:00 PM Thank you Heidi. No one who doesn't suffer from them can really understand. And no one much tolerates being awakened by screams. I appreciate your comment and I am glad to hear you found help. Blessings, Connie : )