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Mcbeals Thanksgiving Turkey

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He loved a drink did ol'Johnny McBeal
And offered to cook the thanksgiving meal
All the trimmings with turkey
For their friends and family
His wife agreed but no drink was the deal...

On the big day he was up before five
But with no drink knew he wouldn't survive
Found a bottle of sherry
Then started to get merry
Guests arrived and the bird was still alive...

Johnnys wife said " you've ruined thanksgiving
The turkeys gobbling and it's still living
There is no main course
I want a divorce
I'm upset and I won't be forgiving"...

She then reached out for a sharp carving knife
Johnny was shaking in fear for his life
She wanted the turkey dead
Who ran out the door and fled
Johnny thought she is one demented wife...

Johnny was determined to save the day
And phoned Mcdonalds for a takeaway
Ten turkey burgers arrived
Ol' Johnny's marriage survived
Then before dinner they knelt down to pray...

And what became of the McBeals turkey?
He was found terrified up in a tree
His poor life was spared
By someone who cared
Now lives in peace in a bird sanctuary...



 Written 16th November 2021

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P.S. Awtry

Date: 12/14/2021 8:25:00 PM

“There is no main course/I want a divorce”—that made me chuckle! This was a fun one! All the best to you for the holiday season!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/14/2021 11:32:00 PM

Thank you very much PS, im happy you enjoyed the humour. Merry Christmas to you and yours.. Tom

Caren Krutsinger

Date: 12/13/2021 12:28:00 PM

"Johnny was determined to save the day And phoned Mcdonalds for a takeaway Ten turkey burgers arrived Ol' Johnny's marriage survived" - Ha! This would have probably not saved a lot of marriages.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/13/2021 12:43:00 PM

Thank you very much Caren, a turkey burger wouldn't have saved my marriage lol. Tom

Deb M

Date: 12/9/2021 5:59:00 PM

Great poem Tom…..very funny! Man of many talents. Like your sky diving photo!!! Debx

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/13/2021 12:41:00 PM

Thank you very much Deb, glad you enjoyed the humour. That pic was taken in Turkey paragliding off Mount Bagadad, an amazing experience,thats me with the black helmet. Tom

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 12/7/2021 3:17:00 PM

Hmm, I think maybe I saw it before but I did not find my comment. I really enjoyed your turkey tale here, Tom. Keep up the great humor.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/7/2021 3:43:00 PM

Thank you very much Andrea, your comment is still there, check out T'was the night before Christmas, I think you'll enjoy it. Hope you're well. Tom

Judy Ball

Date: 12/6/2021 2:58:00 PM

lolol This is great Tom. I'm the same , love a turkey dinner but it has to be dead before I ever see it or I'll be eating take out too. Can't kill anything. So glad Tommy Turkey lives in a bird sanctuary. God Bless, JB

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/6/2021 3:31:00 PM

Thank you very much Judy, thought I'd give it a happy ending. Tom

Tony Hargreaves

Date: 12/6/2021 2:02:00 PM

Hi Tom. Enjoyed your multi-limerick. Lots of fun images. Pleased the turkey escaped the knife. And now safe in bird sanctuary. But where do McDonalds get their meat for turkey burgers. Best wishes. Tony

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/6/2021 2:11:00 PM

Thank you very much Tony, im pleased that you enjoyed them. Re Mcdonalds it's a good question lol. Tom

Lisa Ricci

Date: 12/6/2021 10:38:00 AM

Hello Tom - I just adored this entry. It is a feel good story for certain and yes very flowing, You executed the format wonderfully with a timely and fun subject. It was a pleasure turning to your page and entry. Thank you for sharing with us. May this day find you well. Blessings always.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/6/2021 12:12:00 PM

Thank you very much Lisa, im pleased that you enjoyed my humourous limerick. Hope you have a lovely week. Tom

Robert Lindley

Date: 12/5/2021 12:05:00 PM

As always my good friend, you delight your readers with exceptional creations! Such creativity amazes me and is a mark of A TRULY GREAT WRITER, imho. A fav.. God bless..

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/5/2021 12:45:00 PM

Thank you very much Robert, im happy that you enjoyed the humour and hope that you had a happy thanksgiving. Tom

Weston Gregory

Date: 12/3/2021 1:20:00 AM

a fun piece with a brief commentary on the tumult of marriage. nicely done

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/3/2021 1:32:00 AM

Thank you very much Weston, I'm happy that you enjoyed it. Tom

Charles Messina

Date: 12/1/2021 5:22:00 AM

LOL...If Johnny's wife accepted a McDonald's turkey burger for Thanksgiving...let me know if he eventually gets a divorce. I'll marry her (lol) Love this, Tom. Hope all is well. Charlie

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/1/2021 2:01:00 PM

Thank you very much Charlie, all good here and I hope you are too, I've been away for a few days, playing catch up at the moment. Tom

Harry Horsman

Date: 11/30/2021 2:09:00 PM

What an amazing and funny journey reading through these Tom. Thanks, Harry

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/1/2021 4:46:00 AM

Thank you very much Harry, im happy you enjoyed them. Tom

Paula Goldsmith

Date: 11/30/2021 10:19:00 AM

What a "McBeals Thanksgiving Turkey" write. There is always next year. So watch out Mr. Turkey. Is this why some have ham or chicken???? Have a blessed day writing away......................

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/1/2021 4:45:00 AM

Thank you very much Paula, thought I'd end on a happy note. Hope you're well. Tom

David Mchattie

Date: 11/28/2021 7:16:00 PM

Funny stuff my friend, I love a story that ends well for all. Well penned indeed. Stay well.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/28/2021 11:31:00 PM

Thank you very much David, in the world of doom and gloom it's nice to have a happy ending. Hope you're keeping well. Tom

Krish Radhakrishna

Date: 11/28/2021 2:00:00 PM

Happy Thanksgiving!! great write and as funny as ever!! As a vegetarian and against animal slaughter, I must thank the sherry for letting the Turkey free!!:)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/28/2021 11:51:00 PM

Thank you very much Krish, everyone loves a happy ending. Hope you're keeping well. Tom

Paul Callus

Date: 11/26/2021 6:52:00 AM

A most enjoyable Thanksgiving Limerick narrative, Tom! Thank you for giving that turkey a 2nd chance:) Regards // paul

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/26/2021 8:25:00 AM

Thank you very much Paul, thought I'd end it on a happy note. Hope you're well. Tom

Malabika Ray Choudhury

Date: 11/26/2021 5:19:00 AM

Dear Tom, Your humorous stories are so well-penned - the characters come alive! Really enjoyed your Turkey-story. Glad that the Turkey was saved, and the marriage was saved, after all. Happy Thanksgiving! Warm wishes ~ Mala

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/26/2021 8:24:00 AM

Thank you very much Mala, im happy that you enjoyed it. Sadly we don't celebrate it in the uk which is a pity. Tom

Rama Balasubramanian

Date: 11/25/2021 9:49:00 AM

Wonderful write Tom. Enjoyed reading. Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family. Thanks for your constant support

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/25/2021 10:49:00 AM

Thank you very much Rama, glad you enjoyed it Tom

Besma Riabi Dziri

Date: 11/25/2021 12:33:00 AM

Wow! You just cheer with your storytelling gift and the sense of humour in your well structured Limericks! You just write with a spontaneous beauty and a craft of an Artist! So much enjoyed the read, Tom! Thank you so much for what you bring of beauty to the reader's soul! Happy Thanksgiving! My deepest regards and blessings.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/25/2021 12:59:00 AM

Thank you very much for your lovely comment Besma, I'm happy that you enjoyed it. I hope you are keeping well and happy thanksgiving to you. Tom

Mystic Rose Rose

Date: 11/23/2021 4:02:00 PM

Ah, I love people who save turkeys, now thats my kind of human , lovely story well rhymed dear Tom. Happy Thanksgiving if you are celebrating in your part of the world, xo

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/24/2021 3:13:00 AM

Thank you very much Rose, nice to have a happy ending, sadly its not celebrated here but I wish you and your family a very happy thanksgiving. Tom

Arturo Michael

Date: 11/23/2021 10:14:00 AM

Entertaining all the way...I see you have a friend on your shoulders...

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/23/2021 10:38:00 AM

Thank you very much Arturo, lol that was one of the monkeys on the rock of Gibraltar. Hope you're keeping well. Tom

Joanna Daniel

Date: 11/22/2021 4:22:00 AM

Had fun reading this one, Tom, quite a humorous turkey story:)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/22/2021 10:58:00 AM

Thank you very much Jo, im pleased that you enjoyed it. Hope your week is off to a good start. Tom

Bill Baker

Date: 11/21/2021 1:40:00 PM

Nice turkey day limerick Tom. That was one lucky turkey. :-) Have a great Thanksgiving this week. Apoet friend, Bill

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/21/2021 2:02:00 PM

Thank you very much Bill, glad you enjoyed it. I hope you too have a happy thanksgiving. Tom

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 11/21/2021 11:20:00 AM

I like the cute way you ended this one, saving the bird's life. Happy thanksgiving to you, Tom. I 'll be on a vaycay, in case you don't hear much from me this week!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/21/2021 12:00:00 PM

Thank you very much Andrea, everyone likes a happy ending. Hope you have a lovely time away and happy thanksgiving to you and your family. Tom