Lipstick

I got this glittery, ruby-red, smudge-proof lipstick the other day and I really have to say technology is what separates us from the apes. Well, technology and hair.. and.. - ok, let’s not dwell on the ape thing. Remember when lipstick smeared like news-print? Well, neither do I - it was one of those old-timey things you hear about somewhere like phone-booths, CDs and smart republicans. What about the young teenage girls who aren’t supposed to wear lipstick - who put it on, in the morning, at their locker, at school only to discover - seconds before their mom picks them up - that it's practically non-removable? Try hiding your lips from your mom. I want breath-freshening, pizza flavored, jerk-repelling, morning-after-pill lipstick - that glitters, irrisistably, like cotton candy 5ex. *snort* If men wore lipstick I’m sure we’d have all that by now.