I Choose to Dwell in the Clouds

I don’t think I have ever written another poem of such emotional intensity! I was bedridden for almost four months. It was at such a desperate moment that I thought of scribbling down my feelings of despair and I found words coming out like a sudden spurt! It was a new awakening! I wrote nearly 34 poems in a period of nearly two and a half months, all in bed which I included in my first collection entitled BEATS. I still believe it was something providential...! Never had I written a single poem before!! Left alone in a dull and dreary mood, With none to lean on and look for, I tethered my soul to sordid gloom, And chained my fancy, never letting it soar. Dull were the days and sore were the nights, Time slouched on in mechanical beats. Mind devoid of all buoyant thoughts, Senses shut to every cheery throb of life, I lay awake, staring on the ceiling above, My eyes, so lost in a fixed stare, Never a smile lighted up my stony face, Nor a gleam of hope brightened up my brain. Inertia crept over from head to foot. I had long lost my zest for life, With life saps drained out like an empty well, I felt nothing but the heat of scorching drought. Nothing could move my grief laden soul, None could lift the weight off my back, Embers of fire sparked from the anvil of my heart, Heaves of sighs escaped from parched mouth, I wriggled and writhed in unspeakable pain, My spirits sank deeper into a slithery marsh, I saw around only a thick pall of gloom, Or was it a projection of my own self? Anguish gnawed my nerves and sinews, Flames of pain danced within my spine, I felt my head so heavy and beginning to reel, And the heavy weight of lead all around my neck. I felt being pushed down to abysmal depths, And the octopus tightening its tentacles all around Who on earth will set me free? What on earth can lift me up? With thundering force, the question shook my weary self. I sprang to my feet and broke loose my chains, I found I was but in self – exile, A captive entrapped within boundless space. I saw the door opening to infinite lengths, And the arched horizon looming larger than life, I spread my wings and propelled up, And darted through the clouds to distant shores, Never to come down, where I thought I could dwell forever.