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Half Circle of Black

___ ___ — — — — — girl tied to rail tracks vicious horrendous attack train comes her bones crack a scream echoes from the back we all winced ~ cinema’s packed Murder in the tunnel contest 30/01/21 Sponsored by: Kai Michael Neumann Tanka, syllable counter PS 5-7-5-7-7.

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Eve Roper

Date: 2/13/2021 8:53:00 PM

Great tanka almost monorhyme, and shape, David Congratulations on your win.

Gary Radice

Date: 2/13/2021 8:18:00 AM

Herein are my reactions line by line to your classic piece David: Uh-oh! Oh nnnoo! Euchhhhhhh! Whaaaaaaaaa? Phew!!..Heh heh!

David Kavanagh
Date: 2/13/2021 8:40:00 AM

Ha ha, Said and understood with a basic universal language Gary, waking from a nightmare, thank god I was only dreaming, or watching a movie in this case, cheers David

Joanna Feltham

Date: 2/12/2021 10:20:00 AM

Ouch, incredibly vivid. Congratulations on your winning placement.

David Kavanagh
Date: 2/12/2021 11:07:00 AM

Ouch indeed Joanna, A bit too much maybe so I put in the cinema to dilute it down a touch, thank you so much for the comment, cheers David

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 2/12/2021 7:35:00 AM

- Short but good, David - Congratulations so much on your win :) - // Anne-Lise :)

David Kavanagh
Date: 2/12/2021 8:23:00 AM

Thanks Anne Lise, just about seen the light of day, delighted with the placement cheers David

Linda Alice Fowler

Date: 2/12/2021 7:14:00 AM

Hi David I'm back to say congratulations on the win! Linda PS: and to thank you for the tips ;)

David Kavanagh
Date: 2/12/2021 7:25:00 AM

Your very welcome Linda, always love to get a placement, cheers David

Rama Balasubramanian

Date: 2/12/2021 6:05:00 AM

That was a creative take on contest. Congratulations on your premier contest win. Take care Rama

David Kavanagh
Date: 2/12/2021 6:29:00 AM

Thank you for the visit Rama, pleasantly surprised to have made the cut, cheers David

Kai Michael Neumann

Date: 2/12/2021 3:42:00 AM

Beautiful. Congratulations and kind wishes, Kai

David Kavanagh
Date: 2/12/2021 4:07:00 AM

Thank you Kai, I’m delighted to get a mention, great contest, cheers David

Linda Alice Fowler

Date: 2/2/2021 2:36:00 PM

Perfect entry to the contest David! Then Along Came Jones (Ray Steven's song :) o maybe the Coasters?).I like this form. I've not tried a tanka before - I will do so soon - it looks/sounds like fun. GL in the contest! :) Linda

David Kavanagh
Date: 2/2/2021 3:11:00 PM

Thanks again Linda, I think the contest might be a bit out of reach here, yeah if your having a spot of bother on the haiku or senryu and it’s not coming together, then the tankas extra two lines might just give you enough scope, to explain and expand your poem, I’ll keep popping in see how you get on, cheers David

Sara Kendrick

Date: 1/31/2021 12:23:00 PM

Sad one. Reads like a scary contender to the contest. Way to go. Sara

David Kavanagh
Date: 1/31/2021 12:29:00 PM

For some reason Sara the old silent movies came to mind, girl tied to the track, unfortunately no hero this time, murder most foul, cheers David