Get Your Premium Membership

Hailstorms in Heartbeats

In a flourishing vineyard, I’m a vine bearing no fruit, forsaken in the soil of twisted roots, burnt and scarred in blistered blackness, as the cosmic seeds engulf my skin~ with fiery flames of thunder and scorching stones, awakening demons to draw darkness in drowsy strokes, above this field of fiendish flowers. Maybe this is the poem of a soul, singing chaos to collapsed clusters of leafless twigs, drenched in rain and tears… For my empathy, the lotus stars could see, but you’ve long refused to feel these aching refrains~ like hailstorms in heartbeats, bleeding bonfires of woe, yearning to be heard… Tonight I’ll find solace within ashes and thorns~ counting petals painted in pain, pondering: if I were a rose, would you thread rhymes of love in syllables of gold and green? Or would I still be nothing but a wordless sonnet, lost between the waning rays of forgotten sunsets, resting in a sky of moonless rivers…

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 11/27/2024 12:44:00 PM
There is such an aching grief in these words, in a broken world. Mourning hurts. J
Login to Reply
Date: 11/25/2024 3:52:00 PM
Congratulations Ink on your poem about passion's pain and the depth of the arrowhead that pierced the heart from the bow of a lover...
Login to Reply
Date: 11/25/2024 11:20:00 AM
Congratulations Ink! Your beautiful poem "Hailstorms in Heartbeats placed "Third" in my contest. It stood out with its superb use of metaphors combined with a haunting melancholy that pervades throughout it. Very well done, my friend.
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/25/2024 9:15:00 PM
Thank you so much dear emile: 125 entries is a lot to judge from and to make it in your top 3 is truly an honor, one that i did not expect but i am sincerely grateful for: sending you and your family light today and always: happy thanksgiving
Date: 11/11/2024 7:46:00 AM
IE, you've got me thinking about how we go about accepting each other as people. Does what we have on the inside count for more than what's on the outside? As I become older and wiser at my current age of 73, it seems to me that what is inside matters much more than outward appearance. We go through periods of lush growth and periods of emptiness at different times in life, but our moral compass and innate goodness will always remain. I'm not a fan of most plastic surgery and shortcuts. Smiles!!
Login to Reply
Date: 11/9/2024 11:21:00 AM
I love those opening lines, it really sets the scene for the poem and the theme is explored in such a metaphorical and deep manner... I can feel the angst and inner turmoil and in your yearning you express pain, loneliness, and a desire for recognition, but also some form of confirmation for your actions and having the right to make your decision.. its like a pain you must endure to escape from emotions you no longer want to feel.. Your poem is rich in dark and striking expression of internal suffering, resilience, and the desire for empathy and some what understanding...
Login to Reply
Date: 11/8/2024 5:53:00 PM
A potent metaphor...and some beautiful writing... <3
Login to Reply
Date: 11/8/2024 8:25:00 AM
Incredible alliteration. Can we find solace? Perhaps the moon will help, who knows.
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/8/2024 12:25:00 PM
Yes maybe the moon, haha. Thank you dear victor
Date: 11/7/2024 11:04:00 PM
so beautifuly written, remarkable last verse, thanks poet, i improve my poetry and english reading your gracious poems
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/8/2024 12:22:00 PM
Thank you so much thats such a kind thing to say. Grateful for your support truly
Date: 11/7/2024 10:46:00 AM
This poem oozes with the tone of loneliness and anguish. I really liked that last stanza, Ink, especially those last six lines! Brilliant metaphors!
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/8/2024 12:20:00 PM
Awwn thank you so much dear sweet soul aunt
Date: 11/7/2024 10:08:00 AM
Hi Ink your most definitely not a wordless sonnet, far from it. Have a lovely evening.
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/8/2024 12:19:00 PM
Thank you so much thats so kind of you to say dear john
Date: 11/7/2024 5:52:00 AM
Quite an emotional write IE, I can sense the anguish and heartache in your words. Tom
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/8/2024 12:18:00 PM
Thank you always dear Tom i am always grateful for your support
Date: 11/7/2024 5:45:00 AM
Dearest Empress, I truly felt the depth of this poem. I felt I was traveling through a wonderful landscape of inner turmoil and unrequited empathy. It is so full of living metaphors, such as scorched vines and fiendish flowers, that beautifully captures the soul's struggle amidst the chaos. What really tops this one is the heavenly forces and personal pain creating a haunting and yet introspective internal journey. Ohhh, the cry for universal longing for understanding and connection. I think my favorite lines were, "if I were a rose, would you thread rhymes of love in syllables of gold and green?" Empress, this is such a haunting FAV! Autumn Blessings, My Dearest Friend, Daniel
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/8/2024 12:18:00 PM
Thank you so very much dear daniel, so kind of you, im grateful always for your kind and touching responses that makes me feel understood. Sending you light~
Date: 11/7/2024 5:38:00 AM
A vine bearing no fruit amidst plenty, a wordless sonnet lost in forgotten sunsets... sad and melancholy. You write often about heartache, loneliness, rejection. I hope it's not your true lot in life. Here's wishing you days of happiness. Awesome write though
Login to Reply
Woody Avatar
Tom Woody
Date: 11/7/2024 8:39:00 AM
Interesting. I have a struggle with happiness too. It's weird. Maybe content is the best we can hope for. For now
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/7/2024 8:34:00 AM
Loneliness is a mood, i think alot of us feel today, especially given how we are so misunderstood. I wouldnt say my life is lonely. I would say i have my moments. Dont you dear tomsz? And happiness is an illusion, i think staying content is what i do. Thank you for wishing and for leaving a thoughtful comment.
Date: 11/7/2024 5:00:00 AM
Emotive and raw with great metaphors, dear Ink!
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/7/2024 8:32:00 AM
Thank you so very much dear kim: much appreciated
Date: 11/7/2024 12:55:00 AM
forsaken in the soil of twisted roots, burnt and scarred in blistered blackness,… oooo papi that imagery!!! awakening demons to draw darkness in drowsy strokes, above this field of fiendish flowers… gorgeously haunting!!! singing chaos to collapsed clusters of leafless twigs, mmmmm.. like hailstorms in heartbeats, bleeding bonfires of woe, yearning to be heard… ooo love the reference!!! bleeding bonfires of woe, yearning to be heard… The intensity is addictively dramatic!! Love it! lost between the waning rays of forgotten sunsets, resting in a sky of moonless rivers… oooo child I the ending tooo … the heaviness n the beauty this piece flows like a gorgeous river papi!!
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/7/2024 8:28:00 AM
Awwn. Papi your comments flow like a gorgeous river.
Date: 11/6/2024 11:37:00 PM
Wow it’s impressive
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/7/2024 8:27:00 AM
Awwn thank you
Date: 11/6/2024 11:26:00 PM
Dear Empress, this is a poem that pierces into the core of hearts. Hardly any one can write poems of such tragic intensity like you and Silent One. At the very outset, you have expressed a sense of frustration and unfulfillment- "In a flourishing vineyard, I’m a vine bearing no fruit, forsaken in the soil of twisted roots". What touching presentation! I wonder why you feel so when you are in reality a vineyard laden with clusters of grapes. "but you’ve long refused to feel these aching refrains~ like hailstorms in heartbeats, bleeding bonfires of woe, yearning to be heard…" Your poem has left me breathless and heartbroken with its haunting beauty and annihilating sorrow. This goes into my FAVE.
Login to Reply
Empress Avatar
Ink Empress
Date: 11/6/2024 11:42:00 PM
Thank you sweet valsa. Sometimes we write when in haziness… and i guess thats when we express the best. Hugs

Book: Reflection on the Important Things