First Day On the Job

First day as the Sheriff 
    and he's feeling real good.
Wants to make a difference 
    like any rookie should.
Working in a town 
    where boredom grows like grass.
He pulls into McWilleys 
    looking for some gas.
Attendant checks the oil 
    while he looks at open space.
The radio starts a blaring... 
    to head for Miller's place.

The Sheriff soon arrives 
    and Widow Miller's looking strained.
It seems some men from outer space 
    are playing in her grain.
She says, 'When I left the house 
    I thought I heard a noise.
I was quite concerned and thought 
    I'd find those pesky Parker boys.
But I found concentric circles 
    so I sent the Mayor a tweet.
Then I heard a Martian say, 'Sorry Ma'am... 
    for packing down your wheat.'

        New to the job, you're in for a ride.
        Fake it till you make it and let your worries slide.
        If it's soon discovered you haven't any skill.
        Then get your prettiest girl and run for the hills.

The Widow's in a panic 
    but the Sheriff will not yield.
Refusing to tell the Mayor 
    there are Aliens in the field.
When along comes a truck, 
    just adding to the fear.
The rancher yells, 'Them Aliens... 
    is carving up my steers!'
Unsure of what to do, 
    the Sheriff takes their names.
For trying to trick a rookie 
    and playing silly games.

The Sheriff's on the road 
    trying to finish up his day.
When cresting Pepper Hill, 
    there's a spaceship in his way.
He's going through his options 
    and thinks of turning back.
When a Martian taps his window... 
    and his world goes black.
He wakes up in a haze
     and hears a Martian blurt.
'You'd better pucker up boy, 
    this is gonna' hurt.'

        New to the job, you're in for a ride.
        Fake it till you make it and let your worries slide.
        If it's soon discovered you haven't any skill.
        Then get your prettiest girl and run for the hills.

Then get your prettiest girl... and run for the hills.
Then get your prettiest girl... and run for the hills.

                               The End


*For those who might be interested, I will be posting my new cartoon, 'Bob's Your Uncle, on my homepage every second day.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019



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Date: 9/18/2019 10:08:00 AM
More great story telling. This is otherworldly fun.
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Date: 4/30/2019 9:42:00 AM
Very Interesting indeed! Nice posy story!
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Mchattie Avatar
David Mchattie
Date: 4/30/2019 6:20:00 PM
I think I just wrote a county western song? Have a great day.
Date: 4/28/2019 8:14:00 PM
G'day David … a very humorous lyric and well written to keep us entertained. I'd have loved to have seen Barney Fife involved in this one - thanks David - Lindsay
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David Mchattie
Date: 4/28/2019 8:42:00 PM
Thanks Lindsay.
Date: 4/22/2019 3:00:00 PM
Terrific romp! Better than Roswell! So enjoyable, David. Best wishes, Gershon
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David Mchattie
Date: 4/26/2019 10:39:00 PM
Thanks again Gershon.
Date: 4/22/2019 2:48:00 PM
Yep, I'd run for the hills, too! Good story; but, I would not want to run into a flying saucer or an alien from outer space the first day on any job.
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David Mchattie
Date: 4/26/2019 10:38:00 PM
I have a cabin in the woods all prepared for the eventual invasion. Have a great day.
Date: 4/20/2019 11:25:00 PM
Very entertaining! Well done!
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Date: 4/20/2019 1:35:00 PM
Always a wonderfully poetic treat David. I hope they gave up anal probing long ago jajaja.
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David Mchattie
Date: 4/20/2019 5:01:00 PM
Thanks Jeff. Most Aliens from outer space like to stay with the classics. Have a great day my friend.
Date: 4/19/2019 3:00:00 PM
blue ribbon so good!
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Mchattie Avatar
David Mchattie
Date: 4/19/2019 3:14:00 PM
Thanks Douglas. It means a lot. Have a great day my friend.
Date: 4/19/2019 12:21:00 PM
Interesting. I think every one feels this way on the first day of work. Good one. Thank you for the visit.
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David Mchattie
Date: 4/19/2019 2:46:00 PM
The first day of work is always a bit challenging. Have a great day.
Date: 4/19/2019 12:14:00 PM
What a talent you are. Send some my way please? This is a knockout piece, Kim! Take a bow! You inspire me, Panagiota
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Romios Avatar
Panagiota Romios
Date: 4/20/2019 9:40:00 AM
No, not meant for Kim. Just an error on the part of one, exhausted poetess.. So sorry, Panagiota
Mchattie Avatar
David Mchattie
Date: 4/19/2019 2:45:00 PM
This may have been meant for Kim, but I will take it as my own with all the false modesty I can muster. Stay frosty my friend.
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