First Day On the Job
First day as the Sheriff
and he's feeling real good.
Wants to make a difference
like any rookie should.
Working in a town
where boredom grows like grass.
He pulls into McWilleys
looking for some gas.
Attendant checks the oil
while he looks at open space.
The radio starts a blaring...
to head for Miller's place.
The Sheriff soon arrives
and Widow Miller's looking strained.
It seems some men from outer space
are playing in her grain.
She says, 'When I left the house
I thought I heard a noise.
I was quite concerned and thought
I'd find those pesky Parker boys.
But I found concentric circles
so I sent the Mayor a tweet.
Then I heard a Martian say, 'Sorry Ma'am...
for packing down your wheat.'
New to the job, you're in for a ride.
Fake it till you make it and let your worries slide.
If it's soon discovered you haven't any skill.
Then get your prettiest girl and run for the hills.
The Widow's in a panic
but the Sheriff will not yield.
Refusing to tell the Mayor
there are Aliens in the field.
When along comes a truck,
just adding to the fear.
The rancher yells, 'Them Aliens...
is carving up my steers!'
Unsure of what to do,
the Sheriff takes their names.
For trying to trick a rookie
and playing silly games.
The Sheriff's on the road
trying to finish up his day.
When cresting Pepper Hill,
there's a spaceship in his way.
He's going through his options
and thinks of turning back.
When a Martian taps his window...
and his world goes black.
He wakes up in a haze
and hears a Martian blurt.
'You'd better pucker up boy,
this is gonna' hurt.'
New to the job, you're in for a ride.
Fake it till you make it and let your worries slide.
If it's soon discovered you haven't any skill.
Then get your prettiest girl and run for the hills.
Then get your prettiest girl... and run for the hills.
Then get your prettiest girl... and run for the hills.
The End
*For those who might be interested, I will be posting my new cartoon, 'Bob's Your Uncle, on my homepage every second day.
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