Epiphany
My last hour but a pittance of innumerable ones before… How can this be that I
did not see this time at hand. I, but a mere man, thought I was much more. Where
did I espouse that faulty imagining. What circumstances led me down and drew me
to that surreptitiously slippery slope where my dragons were but petals of my fears
of failure.
Failure in what, I may ask as my last hour chokes my Johnny come lately tears
from my wrinkled swollen lids. Failure is but a loss of a thing that perhaps may be
grasped and for some reason is not. My wretched lot contained no such reality. I
looked to the convenience of self and comfort in the pride of being self made.
I deserve it; I’m worth it, I thought and no one shall deny me. I thought to live
life on my terms, translating ethics, morality and a quest for the God I always knew
existed into a system of beliefs that prettily laced my comfort zone induced by the
world’s pseudo view of what should be. I fear I always knew my dragons were
lifeless because as it were, there was nothing in this made up shell to harm.
Nothing.
Now my last hour but a pittance of the innumerable ones before… except that
now I see and even that is far better than all those previous.
Let me do for someone? Perhaps lend a hand in my remaining minutes… Ah yes
that’s it! That is where the road lies… tracing into this epiphany…but my minutes are
spilling from this my last so I give this little soliloquy to whomever may read it. The
only chance I have to make success of an otherwise self serving existence. Please
take it. I see now. Thank you at last. Good by my fellow peers and learn from my
failure and that shall be …
my success.
7/18/11
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