Notes About The Poem

A Fallen Sparrow

It was just lying there on the floor
like a poem I had abandoned, 
left for dead, considered trash
Not a breath did it take
No thrashing to behold
I'd not witnessed its death
in the making, truth be told
but I knew with every instinct
so I hung my head this morning
in respectful mourning 

Its eyes, I'd only imagined
winked at me while I stared in shock
wondering where was its winged flock
to have left it here all alone
to have its feathers plucked
like an oyster that'd been shucked
eaten by a hungry mouth
left to decay were its tiny bones
when it should've been flying south

I knelt to whisper of my sorrow
for this stiff fallen sparrow
who would never see another morrow
and grieved for its remains until
I was aghast but relieved to see
its outstretched wings 
had deceived my blurry eyes
What joy it brought me to realize
this bird was not of flesh and blood
but an Origami work of art
Copyright © | Year Posted 2024

Poem

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Meadows Avatar
March 15, 2024 at 4:16 AM
Congratulations on your POTW. Well done.
Lane Avatar
March 15, 2024 at 4:26 AM
Thank you very much, Jeanette.
Rodrigues Avatar
March 13, 2024 at 5:32 AM
Back with congratulations for POTW! I love this one, Lin!
Lane Avatar
March 13, 2024 at 5:41 AM
Thanks so much for the congrats comment, Kim. Have a fun day.
Kaufman Avatar
March 13, 2024 at 5:27 AM
HI Lin, Congratulations on The Fallen Sparrow. You managed to bring such empathy from this reader as you visually described this poor tiny sparrow, never suspecting such an ending to come. You are a bit of twister trickster, eh? Enjoyed it. Blessings to you dear poetess.
Lane Avatar
March 13, 2024 at 5:41 AM
Hi Nancy and thank you ever so much for your plaudits. "Twister trickster." Lol that's a mouthful of fun!
Springer Avatar
March 12, 2024 at 10:08 AM
This poem reminds me of times when I see something vaguely in the distance and make too-quick assumptions of what it is. I guess that's a human trait - to jump to conclusions too fast. Excellent poem.
Lane Avatar
March 12, 2024 at 10:18 AM
We have many human flaws, Mark. They don't always work out to be something less than tragic. Thank you very much for your kind remarks.
Calasibetta Avatar
March 12, 2024 at 9:48 AM
How lovely, how engaging and creative! I love its compassion that rises on the wings kindness. Congratulations your POTW! Kudos, Paulette
Lane Avatar
March 12, 2024 at 10:15 AM
Hi Paulette. Thank you so very much for reading and commenting on this one with your gracious words. I appreciate your insight.
Jones Avatar
March 11, 2024 at 5:22 AM
Wow engaging and emotional! Congratulations on your poem winning potw!
Lane Avatar
March 11, 2024 at 7:31 AM
Hello, Karen and thank you ever so much for your thoughtful comments.
Baker Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 7:11 PM
Congratulations on your POTW honor, Lin! You certainly deserve the honor for this sensitive and loving poem. I love the twist at the end, well done after reminding us to be respectful of all live in all forms. Smiles ~ Blessings, your poet friend in Texas, Bill
Lane Avatar
March 11, 2024 at 7:29 AM
Hi Bill and thanks for you fine review. I'm delighted by your comments and the smiles. Thanks so much.
Allison Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 2:56 PM
Wow Lin you had me emotional with this one . I love the clever twist at the end, especially as I can't see the origami pic with the potw, many congratulations hugs Jan xx
Lane Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 3:37 PM
Hey there, Jan! Thanks a bunch and hugs, chick!
M  Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 12:54 PM
Congratulations on a well deserved POTW lovely Lin! This poem tugged at my heart as l often think to myself that wild or free animals of any kind are treated in a blasé manner when they die….people walk or drive passed them without a second thought or recognition. Like road kill….l often think was that rabbit or whatever it was getting food for their family and got hit by a car…Your poem gave light and love to one of lifes creatures….with a curve ball last line Ha!! Debx
Lane Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 1:21 PM
Hi my kind friend. The soft places in your heart are exposed in your comments, and that make me smile. I'd expect nothing less from you because I know how much all small creatures mean to you. I'm so pleased that you liked this one. Thanks!
Rodgers Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 12:08 PM
Dearest Lin, I am giving you a standing ovation for POTW! You and your poem are so deserving! - Blessings, Daniel
Lane Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 1:20 PM
Thank you ever so much for the applause, Daniel. lol Your kind comments are so delightful to read.
Kavanagh  Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 9:43 AM
Congratulations Lin on a quite remarkable POTW, I honestly wasn’t sure til the end what was going on, I’d seen your picture, but thought it was just a prob for the poem, A fine work of art indeed both poem and Origami piece, cheers David
Lane Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 1:18 PM
Thanks so very much for your fine feedback, David. You're thoughts are always encouraging.
Fowler Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 6:38 AM
What a great poem Lin! You artfully built the sadness of its death, and the relief felt in recognition of its true form. Congratulations ON POTW! :)
Lane Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 1:17 PM
Many thanks for your awesome comments, Linda. I appreciate every word.
Kitchin Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 4:24 AM
Lin, love your poem, captivating and with a great ending, congratulations on POTW! Hugs
Lane Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 1:17 PM
Thanks so very much for your thoughts and congratulations, Tania.
Cunningham Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 3:53 AM
It started off quite sad but ended in joy, well written Lin and big congratulations to you on the honour of POTW. Tom
Lane Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 1:16 PM
That's life sometimes, Tom. "All's well that ends well." Thanks for the congratulations!
Dietrich Avatar
March 9, 2024 at 1:53 PM
Oh wow. Love this one. A fave
Lane Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 1:15 PM
Thanks for the fave and kind thoughts, Andrea.
Goldsmith Avatar
March 8, 2024 at 2:17 PM
"A Fallen Sparrow" is a wonderful story/write from the first line to the last line. Great picture. It has been many years since I made any Origami things. Have a fun Origami day........
Lane Avatar
March 10, 2024 at 1:14 PM
Dear Paula, your kind words are always appreciated. Thank you.
Rodgers Avatar
March 7, 2024 at 6:19 AM
Dear Lin, your poem is a masterpiece of emotion and introspection. Your words evoke a sense of loss and reflection, beautifully capturing the essence of vulnerability and the human experience. The imagery leads us on a journey of empathy and self-discovery. Your twist ending adds depth and introspection, leaving a lasting impact. Your poem is a testament to your skill as a poet and storyteller. Keep shining, Lin! - Blessings, Daniel
Lane Avatar
March 7, 2024 at 6:49 AM
Sorry, Daniel. I was in the middle of a conversation and didn't want you to think I'd responded to Kim and not to you. She suggested I remove the last line, and she was right. It added nothing to the tale and distracted from it. You are so very gracious and generous with your compliments. Humbly, I thank you for thinking my poetry is deserving.
Lane Avatar
March 7, 2024 at 6:32 AM
I’ll get back to you in a bit hugs and a smile
Rodrigues Avatar
March 7, 2024 at 5:56 AM
Quite interesting. Not sure that you needed to end with the last line. There is a clue at the beginning… like a poem I had abandoned, left for dead, considered trash…Now you will laugh, I once feared a water mocassin was in my house. After my neighbor (Police) examined the living specimen, I looked and realized it was an eel my husband had in our fish tank. How embarrasing & hilarious. Love your poem, Lin! A fave!
Lane Avatar
March 7, 2024 at 7:08 AM
oh my gosh! I would've been frightened, too! Thanks for your suggestion, the fave, and your snake story. Hugs.
Lane Avatar
March 7, 2024 at 6:30 AM
You’re right, Kim. Thanks.
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