Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.
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The other day I bumped into Santa Claus. A good bump it was, too! I ought to have been arrested, for there is no open season on Santa Claus. But sometimes a first class collision is an exciting thing. It will knock the wind out of you, and it may knock an idea into your head. True, this Santa Claus did not have the white cotton whiskers or a red coat, but she was the real thing all right! Santa Claus in the flesh and plenty of it. A lady who looked like an animated Christmas tree with packages dangling from very limb and I bumped and spilled. As I was trying to pick up the packages she gasped out, Oh, I hate Christmas anyhow! It turns everything upside down. To which I said, That is just what it was made for. This lofty sentiment did not stop her dirty looks at all. But it is the big thing about Christmas.
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Police chief wiggum: Put out an A.P.B on Uosdwis R Dewoh, better start with greek town!
Detective: Thats Homer J Simpson chief! You're reading it upside down.
Police chief wiggum: Err.. cancel that A.P.B! But err bring back some of them errm giro's!
Detective: Eh, chief.. You're talking into your wallet!
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When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 C.
The Russians used a pencil.
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'Bury me on my face,' said Diogenes and when he was asked why, he replied, 'Because in a little while everything will be turned upside down.'
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Ask for no guarantees, ask for no security, there never was such an animal. And if there were, it would be related to the great sloth which hangs upside down in a tree all day every day, sleeping its life away.
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When BP was not moving fast enough on claims, we told BP to set aside $20 billion in a fund - managed by an independent third party - to help all those whose lives have been turned upside down by the spill.
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One mind awake can awaken another, The second awake can awaken their next door brother. Three awake can awaken the town By turning the whole place upside down. Many awake can make such a fuss That they finally awaken the rest of us.
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When I die, I want you to bury me upside down, so the whole world can kiss my ass.
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My pearl, my life, my loved ones have been turned upside down,
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The world is wrong side up. It needs to be turned upside down in order to be right side up.
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