LISA: Dad, why are you dedicating you life to blasphemy? HOMER: Don't worry, sweetheart. If I'm wrong, I'll recant on my deathbed.
|
I would like to be a butterfly. Because nobody suspects the butterfly.
|
Oh crap, I've wasted my life
|
Police chief wiggum: Put out an A.P.B on Uosdwis R Dewoh, better start with greek town!
Detective: Thats Homer J Simpson chief! You're reading it upside down.
Police chief wiggum: Err.. cancel that A.P.B! But err bring back some of them errm giro's!
Detective: Eh, chief.. You're talking into your wallet!
|
Love is a perky little elf dancing a merry little jig and then, suddenly, he turns on you with a miniature machine gun.
|
Your great-uncle Horace had a saying: 'Shoot 'em all and let God sort 'em out.' Of course, one day he put his theory into use, and it took thirty U.S. Marshalls to bring him down.
|
Call this an unfair generalization if you must, but old people are no good at everything.
|
Fat tony is the cancer of this city, and I am the... What cures cancer?
|
This is my sandbox. Over there is the deep end, I'm not allowed to go in there. That's where I see the leprechaun, he tells me to burn things.
|
Aerosmith went on The Simpsons and they had fun.
|
It's funny because it's true.
|
Oppression and harassment are a good price to pay, to live in the land of the free
|
It tastes like burning.
|
My cat's breath smells like cat food.
|
Dad! We've done something awful!'
'Did you wreck the car?'
'No'
'Did you raise the dead?'
'Yes'
'But the car is okay?'
'Yes'
'Well run along then
|
Smell that Ralph? That's the smell of justice.' 'It smells like hot dogs.
|