Once on a yellow piece of paper with green lines he wrote a poem And he called if 'Chops' because that was the name of his dog And that's what it was all about And his teacher gave him an A and a gold star And his mother hung it on the kitchen door and read it to his aunts That was the year Father Tracy took all the kids to the zoo And he let them sing on the bus And his little sister was born with tiny toenails and no hair And his mother and father kissed a lot And the girl around the corner sent him a Valentine signed with a row of X's and he had to ask his father what the X's meant And his father always tucked him in bed at night And was always there to do it Once on a piece of white paper with blue lines he wrote a poem And he called it 'Autumn' because that was the name of the season And that's what it was all about And his teacher gave him an A and asked him to write more clearly And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door because of its new paint And the kids told him Father Tracy smoked cigars And left butts on the pews And sometimes they would burn holes That was the year his sister got glasses with thick lenses and black frames And the girl around the corner laughed when he asked her to go see Santa Claus And the kids told him why his mother and father kissed a lot And his father never tucked him in bed at night And his father got mad when he cried for him to do it Once on a paper torn from his notebook he wrote a poem And he called it 'Innocence: A Question' because that was the question about his girl And that's what it was all about And his professor gave him an A and a strange steady look And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door because he never showed her That was the year Father Tracy died And he forgot how the end of the Apostle's Creed went And he caught his sister making out on the back porch And his mother and father never kissed or even talked And the girl around the corner wore too much makeup That made him cough when he kissed her but he kissed her anyway because that was the thing to do And at three A.M. he tucked himself into bed his father snoring soundly That's why on the back of a brown paper bag he tried another poem And he called it 'Absolutely Nothing' Because that's what it was really all about And he gave himself an A and a slash on each damned wrist And he hung it on the bathroom door because this time he didn't think he could reach the kitchen
|
After listening to a lecture on evolution by a science professor, a student wrote a poem and titled it ''The Amazing Professor.'' The poem read: Once I was a tadpole when I began to begin. Then I was a frog with my tail tucked in. Next I was a monkey on a coconut tree. Now I am a doctor with a Ph.D.
|
Whatever universe a professor believes in must at any rate be a universe that lends itself to lengthy discourse. A universe definable in two sentences is something for which the professorial intellect has no use. No faith in anything of that cheap kind!
|
I am opposed to writing about the private lives of living authors and psychoanalyzing them while they are alive. Criticism is getting all mixed up with a combination of the Junior F.B.I. -men, discards from Freud and Jung and a sort of Columnist peep-hole and missing laundry list school. Every young English professor sees gold in them dirty sheets now. Imagine what they can do with the soiled sheets of four legal beds by the same writer and you can see why their tongues are slavering.
|
A schoolteacher or professor cannot educate individuals, he educates only species.
|
The professors laugh at themselves, they laugh at life; they long ago abjured the bitch-goddess Success, and the best of them will fight for his scholastic ideals with a courage and persistence that would shame a soldier. The professor is not afraid of words like truth; in fact he is not afraid of words at all.
|
'To my thinking' boomed the Professor, begging the question as usual, 'the greatest triumph of the human mind was the calculation of Neptune f...
|
Yes, I think it is very clear to all of us who are engaged in the business of assessing toxicity data that, when volumes of data are proudly presented to us after a carcinogenicity study, showing that there was a tumour in this organ or that, we look at it and we scratch our heads, and we wonder what on earth we can make of it. This is especially true when huge doses are given, with nothing to suggest what would be expected at low doses. I think very often the carcinogenicity studies are a waste of everybody's time and a fearful waste of animals. They are conducted partly because we are not sure what to do instead, and partly because they are a political gesture and a very miserable one at that.
|
STATISTIK
Antal krig mellan åren 1816 och 1991: Demokratier mot demokratier - 0 Demokratier mot icke-demokratier - 155 Icke-demokratier mot icke-demokratier - 198 De regimer som mördat flest människor: Sovjetunionen (1917-1987) - 62 miljoner Kommunist-Kina (1949-1987) - 35 miljoner Nazi-tyskland (1933-1955) - 21 miljoner Nationalist-Kina (1928-1949) - 10 miljoner
Under 1900-talet har, hittills, ungefär 40 miljoner människor dödats på grund av krigshandlingar.
|
America believes in education the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.
|
Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.
|
I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top.
|
It is practically impossible to teach good programming style to students that have had prior exposure to BASIC; as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
|
Life is an earnest business, and no one every became good or great on a diet of broad grins.
|
We have all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now,thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.
|
I was now at a university in New York, a professor of existential psychology with the not inconsiderable thesis that magic, dread, and the per...
|
A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.
|
The fathers of the field had been pretty confusing: John von Neumann speculated about computers and the human brain in analogies sufficiently wild to be worthy of a medieval thinker, and Alan Turing thought about criteria to settle the question of whether machines can think, a question of which we now know that it is about as relevant as the question of whether submarines can swim.
|
The hypothalamus is one of the most important parts of the brain, involved in many kinds of motivation, among other functions. The hypothalamus controls the 'Four F's': 1. fighting; 2. fleeing; 3.feeding; and 4. mating.
|
The salary of the chief executive of the large corporation is not a market award for achievement. It is frequently in the nature of a warm personal gesture by the individual to himself.
|
Let your rule in reference to your social desires be this. Pray for the bad, pity the weak, enjoy the good, and reverence both the great and the small, as each playing their part in the divine symphony of the universe.
|
The highest art is always the most religious, and the greatest artist is always a devout person.
|
I am reminded of the professor who, in his declining hours, was asked by his devoted pupils for his final counsel. He replied, 'Verify your quotations.'
|
We have learned well how to treat cancer in mice and rats but we still can’t cure people.
|
Alas! While the speculative honourable professor explains the entire existence has he in distraction forgotten his own name, that he is a man, purely and simply a man, not a fantastic 3
8 of a paragraph.
|
I had a linguistics professor who said that it's man's ability to use
language that makes him the dominant species on the planet. That may be.
But I think there's one other thing that separates us from animals. We
aren't afraid of vaccuum cleaners.
|
Take away paradox from the thinker and you have a professor.
|
But suppose, asks the student of the professor, we follow all your structural rules for writing, what about that 'something else' that brings ...
|
If we don't change direction soon, we'll end up where we're going.
|
America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.
|