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Lisle Ryder - all messages by user

2/9/2019 5:38:53 AM
Ness Point sonnet	I have contributed to Poetry Soup for nearly a year now but have only now spotted this feature in the Forum. So I offer this sonnet for critical comment. This low salient once populated by Lowestoft people till in 'fifty three a storm surging high tide inundated dwellings lamentably lost to the sea. Former homes replaced by concrete commerce sheltered behind a defiant wall, where years later gathered Christians diverse to greet the Easter sunrise; after all only to be met with grey skies and snow that covered the Salvation Army band. No sign of the sun, we sang with gusto to warm ourselves in this bitter wasteland. No cliffs here to defy a raging sea, just faith shared clasping a mug of tea. The Lowestoft Council of Churches organised this sunrise service each Easter. It was always pretty bracing with a light breakfast afterwards. We had two white Easters during my four years as Curate in Lowestoft. I am not sure whether this was 1974 or 1975. I have a photo of the scene but have not found a way to upload it as a Premium Member. edited by Lisle Ryder on 2/9/2019 edited by Lisle Ryder on 2/9/2019 edited by Lisle Ryder on 2/9/2019
2/11/2019 3:37:21 PM
Ness Point sonnet	Thank you Jack for your comprehensive and considered comments which are very useful. I am a novice so far as meters and their names are concerned. I do realise that reading aloud exposes the deficiences of meter whatever the name and the nature of stresses. I will see about an extra syllable for the line ending in wall, and also some alternative to the Word salient. I need to convey the feature that is actually there. I am glad you appreciate the actual event I have sought to commemorate. Lisle.
4/20/2019 11:50:44 AM
Adding photos	I was delighted to have the news that photos could now be uploaded. Having thought I would not renew my premium membership I immediately decided to do so. Alas! Alas! I see that there is only a facility to upload photos when I submit a new poem. Many of my poems have associated photos. Webmaster, please, please make it possible to add photos to poems already submitted. Thanks in anticipation and a happy Easter. Lisle.
5/2/2020 4:44:00 PM
Along the shore	Along the shore I walked across wet sand leaving footprints, a breeze across my face. I listened to waves sluice across the strand sifting, shifting pebbles to some further place; a restless yet rhythmic refreshing sound: despite the noise, washing and gifting peace. At flood tides' limits rotting seaweeds mound, where grubs and flies emerge for birds to feast. Here on the shore between high and low, between ebb and flow, a margin unclaimed has actions of nature revealed on show. Signs of my presence are washed out, reclaimed, yet held in these phrases I share with you from the shore - ever the same, always new. edited by Lisle Ryder on 5/2/2020 edited by Lisle Ryder on 5/2/2020
5/4/2020 5:50:01 AM
Along the shore	Thank you Jack for your encouraging comments. I am not familiar with the technical terms such as double ionic and trochees. I ought to look them up. Nine syllable in line 9 was not really intentional. I could add 'the' before 'high' to correct this but I am not sure this feels quite right.
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