Love Your Muse

Muses do not have many rules. But their are a few worth mentioning, and according to my sources, whom are very reliable, the first and most important rule Muses have is that the word Muse must ALWAYS be capitolized. Always, or you will pay the price. Another rule they probably have, is that one should learn how to spell capitalize and not to confuse it with capitol, as I have done here. Intentionally, of course.

Of the nine Muses, I am certain Calliope, who is the Muse of epic Poetry, would have more rules than all of the rest of the girls together, but she also is more forgiving whenever a poet breaks any rule, because she told me that she was the originator of "Poetry License." And everybody knows about that and uses it quite frequently. But she also said to never, ever break the rule of capitalizing Muse. You will be sorry if you do.

Another rule she has is to never tell any poet they have written a bad poem. There is no such thing as a bad poem, she told me, only a poem someone may or may not like for one reason or a number of reasons. Calliope says just to ignore the source and let it go at that.

Polyhymnia, the Muse of sacred song, has just such a rule as Calliope does about poetry, that there is no such thing as a bad song or bad music. Some people, and a few of the gods on Mount Olympus, reason that she is the Muse of sacred song, and not all song, but she immediately replies that all song is sacred. Personally, I would never argue with her or any of the Muses about anything. And I certainly would never go to an Apache Bedenkohe Pow-wow and say their songs suck, no more than I would go through the jungles of Africa on a river full of Crocodiles and say the Swahili songs suck, either. I am very sure Polyhimnia would probably tip my boat over right in the middle of the river.

Ano not even Erato, the Muse of Love poetry, would save me, while Melpomene, the Muse of tragedy would only laugh at me and say I had it coming.

The bottom line is to never argue with your Muse or anyone else's Muse, or you will be sorry. Apollo, the leader of the Muses, would not offer a helping hand, and even Zeus, their Pappy, knows better than to dispute the word of any of his Muse daughters. He learned the hard way.

One more bit of advice, in the form of caution, Apollo and the nine Muses live forever, they never die, and so if one or more of the beautiful ladies we call Muses sings for you, just sing along and enjoy it and write whatever they tell you to write. Never, never, ever change a word of what they tell you to write.

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