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Kindness is the quality or state of taking an active interest in the welfare of others; friendly and helpful acts or favors.


How To Be Kind

Blog Posted:12/17/2013 7:39:00 AM

Have you always wanted to be the kind friend that everyone loves? The one that can make anyone happy just by being around them? People like that can make a big impact on people's lives. This article will teach you how to become that person!

  1. Cultivate good feeling towards people within yourself. Forcing yourself to be nice can be both tiring and maybe even noticeably shallow, so while practicing doing kind acts, practice empathy. This will make it become effortless to be kind.

  2. Try to always imagine what other people go through in their lives, and understand their point of view, their emotions. Do this particularly when they do something "wrong", and this will help you forgive them.

  3. When someone has an outburst of anger, think about what kind of stress they are under rather than dwelling on their actions.

  4. When newcomer to your social group makes a faux pas, remember what it's like to be a fish out of water, and that it's not always easy to judge what people expect of you.

  5. Remember that people around you have feelings just like you. Always think "How would I feel if I were in their situation?", "How easy would it be for me to be in their position?" and "Why would they be acting the way they do?"

  6. Smile at everyone, even if you don't know them. Do kind things for them like picking up their book if they drop it or holding the door open for them.

  7. If someone does something embarrassing, don't laugh or snicker at them. Just smile at them to show that nobody really minds, even if it seems like they do.

  8. Socialize with other people. Make lots of friends and be really kind to them; hopefully they'll do the same back.

  9. Be good at what you do, whether that's work or school.

  10. Don't talk about people behind their backs. Don't say hurtful things about them or their family, don't laugh at people, and definitely don't bully anyone.

  11. Compliment people. It doesn't have to be anything really over the top, just something like "Nice work on that project."

  12. Be confident. Not mouthy or in-your-face, just smiley and bubbly, and sweet to everyone.

  13. Learn to relax and be effortless in your kindness. This should be second nature without trying too hard or making too much of an effort. Build this kindness concept into the makings of your character. The rest will fall into place naturally.



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Date: 12/17/2013 8:56:00 PM
Peace Love and Poetry..... Rules!!! TPS.... I want you to know I'm overwhelmed by CHAN.... It takes guts to do what he did..... PD
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That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 12/18/2013 2:04:00 PM
Thanks, Linda. I knew I had to own up to my wrongs; it was the right thing to do. I appreciate your words, sincerely. Thank you :)
Date: 12/17/2013 4:25:00 PM
my mother taught me at a very young age "if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all". That doesn't mean skip constructive criticism, it means lay off personal digs. If you hate someones work, shut up, if you think they need tweaking because of a technical error, sure mention it. Most of us are happy to have "help".
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Date: 12/17/2013 3:01:00 PM
You know, all I ask for is patience. With my father being ill with kidney cancer, my emotions have been running wild and mostly unchecked. I have done and said things I now regret and some thing I have no memory of because I was so heavily medicated on nerve pills. I am a person who suffers from mental illnesses and addiction. I am prone to do the wrong thing or simply act on impulse. At my core, I am a kind and loving person; anyone here that knows me well knows I have problems, but my heart is not ugly. I am capable of ugly things as we all are, but I have been a jack*** and I admit it. I have taken all my emotions and released them on some undeserving people, and I was wrong for that~Chan
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That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 12/18/2013 2:07:00 PM
Thanks again, Linda. You and Skat and everyone else caught up in the drama I created did not deserve it (well, one person did, but he shall remain nameless). You are a kind and loving soul and I appreciate your warm words. Owning up to my wrongs was the right thing to do.
A   Avatar
Poet Destroyer A
Date: 12/17/2013 8:52:00 PM
I am proud of you Chan, you are very brave, and down right awesome in my book. HUGS
A   Avatar
Poet Destroyer A
Date: 12/17/2013 8:50:00 PM
Chan, I was sad and mad after hearing of you know what. (even if it was a joke) To be honest I never crossed any bad mouthing about you, to anyone here on the soup. I would also like you to know, that the person who sent the soup mails. Never said anything bad about you.
That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 12/17/2013 4:31:00 PM
I'm coming clean, Francine. I was wrong on so many levels and I can admit it. It's not an excuse or justification; as I said before, it's just my truth. I don't enjoy hurting people; I'm no sadist. I'm guilty. I was wrong and I want to make amends; that's all I can do.
Roberts Avatar
Francine Roberts
Date: 12/17/2013 4:22:00 PM
a lot of us have issues Chan, it does not give us license to be hurtful to people, a lot of us also have sick or dying parents, myself included. I'm glad you see you were a jack*** because that was the impression you left with me but I did not feel it necessary to tell you that because I want this place to remain a drama free haven
Date: 12/17/2013 1:22:00 PM
#10, !!! #10 !!!! I have been a premium member for years now and I used to be on the site at least an hour every day, now I'm only on to check my contests when I have them, .... too much "drama" going on. The blogs have gotten so out of hand with "he said, she said" crap that I try not to read them. When my membership expires I really doubt if I will renew it.
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Date: 12/17/2013 12:54:00 PM
My problem is that I am a cynic. I feel like Diogenes roaming around Athens in broad daylight with a lantern looking for an "honest man". When Alexander the Great went to meet this philosopher, Diogenes was relaxing in the sun and he said to Alexander "You're standing in my light!" Ambrose Bierce in "The Devil's Dictionary" defines a cynic as "a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be". My philosophies closely align with Cynicism, and that's probably one of my biggest problems and faults. I'm just jaded beyond belief, I suppose
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That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 12/17/2013 1:25:00 PM
excellent advice, sincerely; I appreciate that
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Team Poetrysoup
Date: 12/17/2013 1:10:00 PM
Besides, you are one of the better poets here. Just channel that cynicism into your poetry...not towards others.
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Team Poetrysoup
Date: 12/17/2013 1:05:00 PM
Try the opposite. You may like it. It really is the better way of life. Don't impute bad motives.
Date: 12/17/2013 11:38:00 AM
It is a easy to respond in kind to negativity. It is also a weakness. So, be STRONG! Use self-control...it will make life sooooo much better.
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Team Poetrysoup
Date: 12/17/2013 12:30:00 PM
Just keep working at it Archaic. You can beat it.
That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 12/17/2013 12:17:00 PM
That's wonderful for normal, balanced and well-adjusted individuals. I happen to have several mental illnesses and an addiction do drugs that I must battle everyday. Sometimes I cannot control my emotions or censor myself. It's not an excuse or justification: it's just my truth.
Date: 12/17/2013 11:05:00 AM
I agree with trying harder.....each one of us has a responsibility to make the world better, and even in some small way, we can make the effort our goal for a new year.
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Richards Avatar
Carrie Richards
Date: 12/17/2013 3:19:00 PM
And I love you too, Ruben......you have always made me smile...these many years! Happy Holidays to one of the best!
Richards Avatar
Carrie Richards
Date: 12/17/2013 12:33:00 PM
I do agree....not everyone will want to be our friend, or even be kind in return. However, the point is to strive in a positive way....let it be their problem, not our own...and not add fuel to their negativity. I am not trying to be a Pollyanna.....but the world, and even our small Soup world, does not fare well when anger, and hostility escalate. We cannot and are not perfect people, we never will be, ....but making small changes, making the effort, being an example, and showing restraint and tolerance and go a long way.As you said.this is just my own opinion, and logic..be it unrealistic or not...for me it's worth a shot.
That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 12/17/2013 12:20:00 PM
I've tried to make peace with people to no avail. Sometimes people just don't get along and don't like each other; that's ok. It's a natural, human response. I think this blog is great, but just not realistic, in my opinion.
Date: 12/17/2013 10:31:00 AM
Too many sugary, saccharine sweet sentiments can give one a mindache. Normally, I am a kind person, until crossed. Very utopian and ethical ideals, but also somewhat unrealistic (in my opinion). Oh, well, whatever; nevermind...
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 12/17/2013 12:31:00 PM
I wish you well also, Carrie :)
That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 12/17/2013 12:14:00 PM
Ideally, this is great, but not realistic is my point. It's great and noble to strive for it, but human nature always gets in the way. It's impossible to stay "positive" at all times. Sometimes our emotions get the best of us. My mental illnesses and addictions frequently cause me to have inappropriate emotional outbursts; it's not something I can control :(
Richards Avatar
Carrie Richards
Date: 12/17/2013 11:10:00 AM
I will hope you will reconsider seeing these suggestions in a negative light .....If we can't be positive, hopeful or at least give such ideas a try.....where is there hope for change? Wishing you all the best, Chan.
Date: 12/17/2013 8:59:00 AM
Number 11) This has helped me alot during my life ~To compliment people instead of trying to find faults.Sometimes it might be a simple word which makes someone`s life better or worse.Five~ This has helped a great deal and helped me judge less[to put myself in the other's shoe]Number 6 is my favorite-I love to dmile at people..in a waiting area,the greengrocer, anywhere.Its really great for lifting spirits..and creates an aura of good feeling.I am very patient but when I loose it ..all the kindness disappears..So im working on that-To act good when someone makes me feel bad.In working progress : ).Tnks for uploading this blog.Kindness is a blessing one can't buy with money, gold or make pretend
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Charmaine Chircop
Date: 12/17/2013 12:44:00 PM
Hi Craig..lol : )Are you referring to my penned thoughts or re my silly pic? IIf its about the pic.I took that silly pic about two or three wks ago when I was on my sister island Gozo.Mc donalds donated a euro for every pic taken to people who are sick or in orphanages.So there s a story behind each smile B-).smiles.If its about my thoughts..Smiling avoid frowning wrinkles too : p
Chircop Avatar
Charmaine Chircop
Date: 12/17/2013 9:04:00 AM
I mean Smile not dmile : ).

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