I run through life wounded with a steel jawed trap
ensnared onto my foot restricting my life’s essence.
Day in and day out I’m never able to shake it off,
in relentless movements as fast as I could go
so no new pain touches me.
I fight for sustenance; I fight to inhabit this life
damaged and wearied, from taking life’s persecutions
This invisible torment of my afflictions you can’t
I hold close that God is always watching and will pull me from
The of muddied roads that I run. He hears my tormented cries;
He feels my tortured spirit; He sees I can’t stop this path I’m on.
You say I’m not getting free but the running is
critical to me, as long as I can run, I’ll move,
don’t ask why, don’t question it, don’t try.
It’s not something you’ll ever comprehend.
Don’t question my animal instinct, let me be free
from what haunts me, from the nothingness.
You’re not saving me, you got nothing on me.
I’m God’s creature and vow to be who I am.
You say the war is over but the hurt remains
I keep a mask on through good times and bad
They don’t think my life counts but God sees the
merit of my existence.
Every day, it’s my struggle not yours, no one can imagine
the heartbreak, the suffering, the sorrow cutting my soul
as deeply as the rapt foot, it won’t come off it’s always
I’m still fighting, the battle rages on in my mind.
Stop your judgment, leave me be, if you have not
Been through this anguish run with me or without me.
I have accepted the aloneness in this fight.
This trap keeps me from fending off life’s predators.
I’m a solitary being with a broken spirit. My desperate
expression is evidence enough. Though my instincts are
powerful I’m not able to discern when I’m in danger.
I know GOD watches this unbearable burden I carry.
I pray when my time is up He gives me warning
So in the final moments I can stand still as I’m being
raised up out of this hell into Heaven.
My Angels in Heaven see me; I’m okay to die this way;
it’s not for you to say. I beg God to keep His guard on me.
I’m done defending this. I pray for you without any
prayers in return.
Copyright © DIANE PERNA | Year Posted 2018