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Stanley Billing Poem
Mum will be worried and tonight will be a frost
The sun is going down quickly I know I am lost
Not at all sure if we are on the right track
Shep, you are smart you'll find the way back
It really is my fault, you only have one bad habit
I shouldn't let you chase that big old buck rabbit
Watching you run after it was ever so much fun
If dad was there he would have shot it with a gun
Time sure went fast Shep, what happened to the day
I've had a real good time, and we both like to play
Not at all scared, if we see a bear you will bark
But we better hurry home, can't be out after dark
Silly me, I couldn't remember which way that we went
But you are a smart dog, you will pick up the scent
Mum will be really worried, she'll be a nervous wreck
Dad consoling her, saying "He's okay with Old Shep"
We will be safe, I can feel it in my heart
You're a brave dog Shep and very, very smart
Oh, Shep there it is, I can see our family home
Lets run all the way and I'll get you a big bone
Mum, Dad and Sis are smiling and waving like mad
They are happy to see us, and I'm twice as glad
Now we are home, the day has come to an end
I love you Shep, you really are my best friend
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2015
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Stanley Billing Poem
The redneck was drunk as a skunk
Couple of dozen beers he had drunk
Staggered round the corner into his street
He noticed the flames and searing heat
Was burning fast and the flames got higher
Just then he realized it was his house on fire
Alarmed now, didn't want to loose his home
He ran back round the corner to the pay phone
Grabbed the phone and quickly dialed triple O
"Give me the fire brigade" he said "don't be slow"
"My house is on fire, can you please come put it out"
"Yes" said the fireman, there will be no mucking about"
"We will be on our way soon, so please be aware"
"Could you tell us please sir, how do we get there?"
"Hey? replied the redneck." what a dumb schmuck?"
"Why don't you just drive here in the red fire truck?"
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2015
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Stanley Billing Poem
Every man, woman and child really admires
\The men and women fighting the bushfires
Some deliberately lit, the worst of all sins
The fires roar fiercely in the strong winds
Hundreds of square miles have burnt to the ground
Poor people watching their houses burning down
Just to see it on television is a terrible shock
Gone are farms, houses, buildings and stock
Feel sorry for these people, nothing at all left
Over sixty poor buggers have burnt to death
For weeks us Aussies have suffered dreadful weather
Stinkin' bushfires will bring people closer together
Loosing everything you own must be incredibly rough
The country people will survive, they are terribly tough
Why would anyone want to cause so much pain?
Bastards who lit these fires have no bloody brains
Bushfires are terrible, what an awful way to die
Not much we can do really, but to wonder why
Burnt out cars with poor buggers stuck inside
Couldn't beat the flames, had nowhere to hide
Everyone will be praying, of that there`s no doubt
Hopefully soon, all them damn fires will be out
As I write this, even worse than I`d feared
Whole Victorian towns have simply disappeared
With the winds howling the fires move faster
How can the lord let this happen, a natural disaster?
Mother Nature has dealt out one hell of a hand
Fires in two states and floods in Queensland
Only thing I can offer, not much that is true
To all you poor buggers, my thoughts are with you
I can`t remember anything worse in all my years
Nobody will look, without shedding some tears
Not much we can do to help ease the pain
Guess I`ll pray to God, send down some rain
I think tonight, everyone will be saying their prayers
Hoping the fires are out, that none of them flares
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2015
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Stanley Billing Poem
All I want for Christmas is some false teeth
Last set were taken by a dirty stinkin' thief
Came into my bedroom, twas bold as brass
Were soaking overnight in a dirty old glass
Old false teeth had been with me for quite a while
When thief took them he also took away my smile
Now I mumble a lot and keep my mouth closed
Why did they take my teeth? Lord only knows
Santa, I would not be able to eat my Christmas dinner
Since my teeth were stolen, just keep on getting thinner
Personally believe the thief must be simply a bit of a twit
Did he really think that my false teeth, would actually fit
Reminds me of my Grandma, who was frequently quite uncanny
Sat on a chair, false teeth were there and bit herself on the fanny
All jokes aside Santa, to me it would really be such a relief
If you were to put in my stocking, a new pair of false teeth
Showing off and having my photo taken is not really my style
But if you bought some teeth I'd take a selfie, with my new smile
Please dear Santa, it would have me feeling like a lotto winner
Being able to sit with friends again and eat my Chrissy dinner
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2015
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Stanley Billing Poem
Honey I love you with all my heart
Always have dear right from the start
Precious my darling, you are to me
Paula, I'll love you through eternity
Yesterday for sure, today even more
Value you more than anything in the world
Angel like darling, such a wondrous girl
Loving you Paula is such an easy thing to do
Every morning, lucky to wake up next to you
Never will my love die, just keeps on growing
Thankful I am and I want you to be knowing
Imagine kissing you every day in my daydreams
Never tire of your sweet smile that always beams
Enjoy each and every minute that we are together
Special the bond we have, will surely last forever
Down from the skies, I believe you were heaven sent
Angels and God made for me the perfect judgement
Yielded to you many years ago, head over heels you know
Partnership, over the years we have successfully built
Alive once more we became dear , without a sign of guilt
Useless I once was until you came along giving me direction
Lady I must thank you for showing me real love and affection
Attracted to you from the start, flame's still burning in my heart
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2015
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Stanley Billing Poem
Did you ever stop, to watch a butterfly
Gently spread its wings and flutter by
Wondrous colours, as they fly with ease
Darting all about in the gentle breeze
Up into the trees, then into the grass they dive
Watching them makes us feel glad to be alive
Tis normally on a sunny day in spring
As they flutter around, birds do sing
Could lie in the grass, watch for many an hour
As the bees take the pollen from flower to flower
A ray of sunshine on my face would beam
As you dangle your feet in the cool clear stream
I`d look at your hair and your waist so slim
Give you a quick kiss, then go for a swim
Kicking off your clothes, you'd jump in with me
We would jump around, laughing so childishly
Hand in hand dripping, we get out at long last
Passionately kiss, then make love on the grass
After, lay on our backs and stare at the sky
Day will soon end, can only wonder why
Hour or two later we'll wake under the trees
Give thanks to the Lord for the birds and bees
Sun will soon set and darkness is nigh
Watch one last butterfly gently flutter by
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2015
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Stanley Billing Poem
Man was walking around the library
having a really good look
He had looked everywhere
but still couldn't find that book
He ventured to the counter
to ask the good looking assistant
At first he wasn't noticed
she seemed quite distant
She was on the computer
and on some paper she wrote
As the man got a little closer
he started clearing his throat
"May I help you?" she asked
the very nervous looking man
"Yes" he replied with a twitch
sweating from the palm of his hand
He said "I'd appreciate it a lot
if you kept this just between us
I am looking for a book called
Help For Men With A Small Penis"
Librarian looked up and answered
"That isn't in yet I'm afraid hun"
Then gave a look of dismay
as he said "Yes, that is the one"
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2015
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Stanley Billing Poem
As their pulses quicken even more
I hang quietly here above the door
Excited I am too as they quicken the pace
I have two hands up trying to cover my face
Like a voyeur watching their naked bodies meet
Turned on now, but my heart doesn't miss a beat
Embarrassed just a little at their love making
I don't mean to notice how long they are taking
Faster and faster until they reach ultimate ecstasy
Later they will awake and gingerly look up to me
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2015
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Stanley Billing Poem
Wow! babe, this is as hot as I've ever felt
Hurry, put these flames out before I melt
Stop teasing me darling, with your body so mesmerizing
Seems like forever, for this moment I've been fantasizing
Mercury is rising and soon, I will surely explode
Pulse and breathe quickening, need to unload
Your sweet body I lust and even more require
Only thing now, that can put out this raging fire
May be cold outside and the rain is still drizzling
Steamy here in the bedroom, it's certainly sizzling
Every time you touch my body it is so electrifying
Please douse these flames now I need satisfying
Hot passionate kisses with our tongues entangled
Set me on fire just like you were lighting a candle
Sparks are flying, shorting out my vital components
Not much longer can I take these melting moments
We need to make love right now, I think we oughta
Otherwise you'll need to go and get a bucket of water
Have teased me so long now darling, it is surely a sin
Time to put out the fire and let the lovemaking begin
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2018
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Stanley Billing Poem
Stuck in a little glass cage
Could be there for quite an age
No fresh air and always there alone
No one to talk to in my little home
People walk past every day without a peep
No one even notices me there half asleep
THEN!! all of a sudden someone yells out "Fire"
Sure they couldn't raise their voices any higher
Some bloke smashes the glass with a pick
The shattering sound near makes me sick
Grabs me by the handle and gives me a shake
Think to myself, settle down mate for pity's sake
Tosses me around without a single care
If I could speak at all I would surely swear
Rips out my pin with force, was very fierce
Really hurt me too it was my only body pierce
Grabs my hose in his hand and opens my spout
Excited he is as I shoot all of that white stuff out
As I start to empty I feel a little bit of shame
At least my juices helped douse the flame
He shakes me harder and I give one last spurt
Then throws me aside and that's what really hurt
Done my job now I'm empty, completely spent
Hit the concrete hard and my handle is bent
"No one is hurt" I heard a fireman say with a grin
Then he picked me up and threw me in to the bin
I guess I'm useless now that I don't have any sap
Perhaps someone will find me, use me for scrap
Copyright © Stanley Billing | Year Posted 2015
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