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Pamela Vardy Poem
I love my daughter
I really do
But why does she turn into a monster
when it just me and you
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2014
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Pamela Vardy Poem
DEPRESSION
Every day is a struggle and I don't care
Perhaps I am not alone but always feel that way
Relapse happens all to easy and so easy to give in
Even my friends pretend to understand and I smile a knowing smile
So maybe they are not worth keeping, then I would be alone
Sometimes this is how I feel not a good state of mind
In my own space I would always like to be
Only recently I think with a clear head
Never knowing if I am going to have a good or bad day
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2010
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Pamela Vardy Poem
Once upon a time
Is that how all story's start
fairy tales from the heart
not the darkness of fear
of abuse from ones we hold so dear
the broken promises it wont happen again
But it did over and over and over seven years
I was the scapegoat for all the bad
silly me silly child silly silly man
I hid all the bruises and made up excuses
as to why I was never seen
little did they know you had total control
locked away from the world in a tower block
I came from a broken home with broken marriages
and abuse was the norm
I put up with the abuse cried all the tears
became a brainwashed automated housewife
you used abused and made me worthless
once just once you nearly killed me
that feeling was so sweet
a blackness a darkness a peaceful sleep
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little did I know the stress I was under
Until I had a fit and was hospitalised
I lay in that bed and was able to truly think and clear my head
I HAD TO LEAVE
I did so about a year later
when I found the keys that were always hid
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2014
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Pamela Vardy Poem
Oh what a sight
it has been to many days and nights
what a pleasure
what a thrill
i want it now
my hand is trembling i lick my lips
so uncertain but i want it so much
closer......closer and closer still
gonna do it till nothing is left
oh its there i take a deep breath
the end all a fire
wonderful pleasure i want more
i tried to stop
honest i did
all i wanted was a CIG
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2010
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Pamela Vardy Poem
You made me cry
Don't know why
Feel so sad and blue
But what can I do
You made me laugh
Tears after a storm
Always my anchor
Keeping me at bay
You made my eyes dance
See nothing but you
you made me a lot of things
And I became your wife
We made a family
A boy and a girl
Many years have passed
and I THANK YOU
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2010
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Pamela Vardy Poem
almost midnight
streets aglow
lanterns flickering
but why who knows
rustling leaves
in roadside gutters
cats a prowling
no birds tonight
foxes squealing
calling their young
dogs a barking
secure indoors
some people
on their way home
wobbly walking
talking and laughing
me all alone
sat staring and watching
taking in all the life
knowing really i am not alone
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2010
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Pamela Vardy Poem
Darling daughter
Always admiring
Undoubtedly understanding
Graciously gathering
Hopefully honest
Truthful tones
Eternally expecting
Reassuringly realistic
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2010
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Pamela Vardy Poem
NORMAL
What is the term normal mean
everyone has a different definition
me, am I Normal?
I sure would like to think so
We all have strange ways
and even stranger rituals
and we are the ones
who are called weird
we all are the same
in some way or other
each to there own
we are all separate
I am normal
that is what I say every day
it is you who are strange
to treat me any other way
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2010
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Pamela Vardy Poem
You walk away within a moonlighted sky
Not many shadows passing by
A turning glance just for you
to wave goodbye
That was the last of the memories
Within a lingering kiss upon your palm
Sending it my way
As you get ready to depart
Sadness fills me as you leave
I know I will see you again
Not wanting to watch the news
You never know when something will happen
No newspapers delivered to the door
you never know
Denial all the way
Denial all the way
Phone calls from strangers
just as bad Fearing the worst
Hide and delete
Just in case it bears bad news
Door bells and knocks
From behind hidden blinds
I don’t know you
I don’t want to respond
Eighteen months without human contact
Thinking others wont know
The turmoil and sleepless nights
Wondering and waiting
Until I know the call is from you
Short-lived and awkward
Just glad to hear your voice
Tears down my face
Uncontrollable happiness
Weakness in my knees
Never before so knocked over
with the sound of your voice
Pretending you next to me Holding me close,
Cradling my fears
Until my eyes grow weary
And I snuggle deeply into sleep
Goodnight my love I hear you say
Keep my memory always
Talk of me often
I will always love you
Goodbye my dearest
My last words to you
How I wish this was not true
See you soon, always yours
I will only see you in my dreams
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2014
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Pamela Vardy Poem
You walk away within a moonlighted sky
Not many shadows passing by
A turning glance
To wave goodbye
That was the last of the memories
With a lingering kiss upon your palm
Sending it my way
As you get ready to depart
Sadness fills me as you leave
I know I will see you again
Not wanting to watch the news
Just in case …
You never know when something will happen
No newspapers delivered to the door
Just in case you never know
Denial all the way
Phone calls from strangers just as bad
Fearing the worst
Hide and delete
Just in case it bears bad news
Door bells and knocks
From behind hidden blinds
I don’t know you
I don’t want to respond
Eighteen months without human contact
Thinking others wont know
The turmoil and sleepless nights
Wondering and waiting
Until I know the call is from you
Short-lived and awkward
Just glad to hear your voice
Tears down my face
Uncontrollable happiness
Weakness in my knees
Never before so knocked over
Just with the tilt of your voice
Pretending you just next to me
Holding me close, Cradling my fears
Until my eyes grow weary
And I snuggle deeply into sleep
Goodnight my love I hear you say
Keep my memory, always
Talk of me often
Tell them I will always love
Goodbye my dearest
My last words to you
How I wish this was not true
See you soon , always yours
Copyright © Pamela Vardy | Year Posted 2010
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