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Kassie Buttrey Poem
I have always felt a deep sadness that I could never run away from.
I never gave up and look how far I managed to come.
I can't tell you how many people told me that I had it easy.
If my life was so easy, why do I feel like I can never be free?
I have everything I need and yet, I still feel this darkness in my heart.
I feel these emotions all at once and it is tearing me apart!
It's getting worse and all I can do is hope for that one day;
The one day, where I won't feel like I'm wasting away.
I hate feeling this pain deep inside and not knowing what's wrong with me.
I can't explain why I always feel like I'm drowning!
I don't know how to control these emotions that weigh me down.
I can't explain for fear of dragging down anyone who is around.
I don't want to burden anyone more than I already do.
I'll keep telling myself I'm doing this for you.
I don't want you to see this depression or these emotions that consumes me.
I'll continue being strong for you, but I'll never let you see.
Copyright © Kassie Buttrey | Year Posted 2020
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Details |
Kassie Buttrey Poem
Is it wrong for me to feel such depression and anxiety?
I know I'm loved and I shouldn't feel like this, but I just can't seem to feel okay.
I'm sorry but it feels as if all these emotions are consuming me.
I do my best to brush it off so my loved ones won't worry each day.
I love to see our son's smile and wouldn't take any of it back.
I smile and do my best to tough everything out;
However, I feel consumed by shadows and I'm given no slack.
No matter how optimistic, I'm plagued by paranoia and doubt.
I feel ashamed that I even feel this way...
I'm expected to continue on even stronger than before.
If I were to talk, would my family truly listen to what I had to say?
I shouldn't care, but their disapproval would hurt me down to the core.
I struggle to remember to eat or drink here recently.
Cleaning the house and doing easy tasks feels overwhelming.
I've been irritable and I can feel that something's wrong with me.
I want help but I'm afraid someone will say I'm unfit to be parenting.
Copyright © Kassie Buttrey | Year Posted 2020
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