Vaulter Poems

The Battle of the Bulge

A vaulter, reportedly French,
thought earning a medal a cinch.
Though they won’t divulge
the size of his bulge,
he lost by much more than an inch.

Mondo Duplantis

Greg Duplantis finished fifth in the Olympic trial,
But this pole vaulter would not accept that cruel denial.  
He hatched an elaborate plan which was just his style. 
He hailed heptathlon's Helena Hedlund with a smile. 

His plan to make a vaulter was more than a fantasy, 
Like the fabled fairy tale land of Atlantis.  He 
Married the mighty Ms. Hedlund, and prayed, mantisly,
And, so it was, God gave them Armand Duplantis, see.

Those who denied Greg would be sing a different tune, 
'Cuz "Mondo", manifested the genes from which he was hewn. 
Mondo vaults up to the sky, as high as a balloon.
Once, he even pole vaulted over a crescent moon!  
Don't believe me?  Watch him in Paris, on your TV soon!

Armand Duplantis

I sat, uninspired, in my condo. 
When on TV, no routine John Doe 
Flew above a balloon 
And then over the moon, 
That amazing pole vaulter, Mondo.

Alcedo Atthis

Kingfisher! Sculpturally shaped! Beam with a bold bright beak!
How splendidly your soft-strong somatic symmetry shines!
Awesome is the charm of your topaz eyes and rainbow quill.
Wondrous are your feet, tail, and poised plumage pattern designs.

Symbol of swiftness, prosperity, and agility
Fortune, patience, and abundance abide in your esse
Compassion, courtesy, and creative felicity
With each weather, season, and circumstance, you acquiesce

With paramountcy and persistence, you pitchpole from perch.
Which vaulter in this universe could fulfill such a feat?
Blue and orange! Moving motionless, like a sage, in search
Do you swingeingly oversee the lands-oceans-waves meet?

Infirm in form, you conform to any storm and transform
Is such nature, as though inborn, quilled as a human norm?

Big Puma Gammez

Lotsir B. Redlion and Vevor Gould's
Pultez Vittez Vaulter manager.
Was interviewed by " One Hot Number"
Kazu Steinway.
They used the Peavey Soundstage
With an audience. During the
Interview, the masked Lorsir
Said so ment, cantar! Targus,
Targus! And everyone laughed, 
So the interview frowned not
Knowing the joke.
Then off airmen Bushier said
The bacon in the jam better be
Turkey cause it looked raw
To him!

Big Puma Gammez

Lotsir B. Redlion and Vevor Gould's
Pultez Vittez Vaulter manager.
Was interviewed by " One Hot Number"
Kazu Steinway.
They used the Peavey Soundstage
With an audience. During the
Interview, the masked Lorsir
Said so ment, cantar! Targus,
Targus! And everyone laughed, 
So the interview frowned not
Knowing the joke.
Then off airmen Bushier said
The bacon in the jam better be
Turkey cause it looked raw
To him!

Big Puma Gammez

Lotsir B. Redlion and Vevor Gould's
Pultez Vittez Vaulter manager.
Was interviewed by " One Hot Number"
Kazu Steinway.
They used the Peavey Soundstage
With an audience. During the
Interview, the masked Lorsir
Said so ment, cantar! Targus,
Targus! And everyone laughed, 
So the interview frowned not
Knowing the joke.
Then off airmen Bushier said
The bacon in the jam better be
Turkey cause it looked raw
To him!

Big Puma Gammez

Lotsir B. Redlion and Vevor Gould's
Pultez Vittez Vaulter manager.
Was interviewed by " One Hot Number"
Kazu Steinway.
They used the Peavey Soundstage
With an audience. During the
Interview, the masked Lorsir
Said so ment, cantar! Targus,
Targus! And everyone laughed, 
So the interview frowned not
Knowing the joke.
Then off airmen Bushier said
The bacon in the jam better be
Turkey cause it looked raw
To him!

Big Puma Gammez

Lotsir B. Redlion and Vevor Gould's
Pultez Vittez Vaulter manager.
Was interviewed by " One Hot Number"
Kazu Steinway.
They used the Peavey Soundstage
With an audience. During the
Interview, the masked Lorsir
Said so ment, cantar! Targus,
Targus! And everyone laughed, 
So the interview frowned not
Knowing the joke.
Then off airmen Bushier said
The bacon in the jam better be
Turkey cause it looked raw
To him!

Looking For Something

I am an old man
a deep well
an epoch marriage
a raven haired beauty
five above average kids
Orion deckhand and cook
teacher of the year
Bible study leader
jail preacher
song worship leader
NAU graduate --graduate school
ASU graduate --undergraduate school
life guard
breakfast cook
English tutor
Archie Brokeshoulder's well puller 
grain elevator operator
pizza chef
dishwasher
mental hospital patient
prisoner
welder
all region linebacker
wrestler
pole vaulter
3 high schools
4 jr highs
2 elementary schools
8 states
2 dads
5 moms
6 sisters
4 brothers
13 presidents

I am an old man
I'll swim a mile
this morning
and dance 
all night
golf tomorrow 
backpack Europe
visit kids in Montana
come back to Arizona
visit kids in Kentucky
do more Europe
come back to Arizona 
swim and golf
then who knows
India, Nepal, Tibet
I am an old man
looking for something

Chair Yoga Skeleton

A soul in flight soars above the grimy midnight mist only to be swallowed by audacious moonlight droplets.
Heart, mind and artery
skip seamlessly across a canvass wet and damp,
soaking up the wild blue mildew spot flood.
Chair yoga skeleton figure,
quaking in mid-air,
much to the chagrin of startled night owls.
Baby moth or butterfly swept up by artic gusts,
the rainbow in my psyche whirls around the neon signage.
Blood red flash alert,
wee small hours traffic signal vaulter that I am.
Ghostly cry from rendezvous of past enchantment,
bony elbow echoes at the edge,
neck craning memoir a distorted mirror,
a foghorn on mute

Taking a Poll

After taking a new poll in southern Siam
She locked the papers in a vault, tight as a clam
When they asked her why
She said with a sigh,
"Because a poll vaulter is what I am!"

Shafted

Bobby Aiken was proud to be Scotch.
As a pole-vaulter he was top-notch.
But on one faulty try
he became a soprano guy,
having been poled crack-on in the crotch.

Practice

Many people will finally pray when someone dear is lost
Or when they've lost their way thus incurring a terrible cost
Usually spur of the moment if I can ever even get a chance
As thus this poem has been sent for you to maybe alter your stance

For think of a great swimming champion do they swim only once a week
For with just that little bit being done should it be the gold that they seek
Maybe even just sitting at the pool and just watching the others swim by
One would have to be a fool if you think that any swimmer can stay dry

Or a pole vaulter who jumps and goes soaring in the air
They have taken many lumps in order to obtain such flair 
Not just a few minutes once a week or a couple times a year
Chances of winning would be bleak are the words in your ear 

No, to be really good at anything it always takes a lot of practice
It's the effort you now bring as greatness always comes from this
It's staying in touch all the long day and right before you go to bed
Because that is really the only way that you'll ever hear what GOD has said

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