Tightwad Poems - Poems about Tightwad

The Christmas Gift

...
She opened her gifts on Christmas morn
Beneath the paper, a gift she’d scorn
Lacey Panties unflawed
She thought, "what a tightwad!"
Panties in a wad since they’d been worn!






...

A Couple of Lims

...TIGHTWAD TIMMY

Tightwad Timmy bought some very cheap meat
With fresh vege t'would be a nice tasty treat
But something was wrong 
There was a strange pong
And maggots were dropping o...

The Art of Caring

...I will admit I was a tightwad, though that fact shames me now,
As never changing mountains, often colorful mists will allow!

I never meant to be unkind, but only endeavored to be practical,
Like...

Cheapskate

...husband’s cheap gift wife’s 
expression priceless wife drags 
tightwad mate to court 


Created and posted : 23 November 2020

Contest : Make Me Laugh With Some Humour

Sponsor : Tania Kitch...

I Am

...I Am

Me-Created by God

Woman–I give freely, I am not a tightwad.

Wife–But not to Todd.

Mother–I do not believe in sparing the rod.

Poet–I love to write even if it is about a fly rod.
...

Rock Ribbed Dogmatic Secular Humanist

...Morality and self-fulfillment
attainable without belief in God
similarly yours truly
would figuratively crane
his credulity to ascertain Ichabod
mentioned in first Book of Samuel
as purported s...

Confidences Travel Fast

...He is...
She is....
I am....
We are....
News travels fast.
Especialy when it is self-revealing or telling
More especially if it is juicy or gloomy
He is a tightwad.
She is having an affair.
...

Way Hey

...There was a sailor in a bar downtown
Who had a need to be playing around
A tightwad was he
And frisky was she
He gave her a round - she blew the man down


August 2, 2018


Sea Tales Lim...

Authenticated Addressed Partial Letter Circa 1970 Part Two

...He ranked as de facto semiprecious,
tremulous and unanimous scapegoat
bullied by a bumptious, callous,
disputatious hippopotamus of a brat
infamous bruiser later in his life to become
forty fift...

Sinister Tightwad In Westminister

...Sinister Tight Wad In Westminster

Someone sat that he became sinister,
When called tight wade in Westminster;
Where he did go,
Was called a weirdo;
In plate he had placed his pet hamster.

J...

Tightwad

...Three months ago a man went to be with God.
He lost his life savings because he was a tightwad.
He saved over a quarter of a million dollars and spent little of it.
Now his relatives are spending ...

You Can'T Take It With You

...The other day I saw the most pathetic thing I think I shall ever see!
It was so macabre and shocking that it piqued my curiosity!

Seems this old miser died having atoned for his many transgressio...

Close Call In Ireland

...CLOSE    CALL   IN    IRELAND



I once had an affaire de coeur  with a foxylady, in fact a randy colleen
In Ireland with a tough older brother looking to punch me out.
But I cold cocked the rambunct...

Plastic Paradise

...Want it?
Charge it!!
Can't afford it?
Charge it!!
Plastic startin'
to wear a bit thin?
Charge it on another
card...you win!!
No one can stop you now...
And, look, by God, 
You have rooms fi...

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