Short Outguess Poems

She tried to outguess me. Thought she knew me.
She was an irritant like a tsetse fly.
I ran from her.
Glad I only see her every five years.
Finally realized I am not obligated to attend class reunions.
With a roomful of people I do not recognize
And have nothing in common with except for former locale....

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Detectives solving crimes
Flashing their badges
Canvassing neighborhoods
Questioning potential witnesses
Explaining the forensics

Showing us how to taint a crime scene
Explaining blood spatter patterns
I sit in my chair trying to outguess them
Feeling smug, proud of myself,
Professional Lazy-boy detective....

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filming lightning
sounds easy
it isn’t

you have to outguess the lightning
and snap the photo
before it appears

lightning-fast is not a joke
it is real
I took seventy-six photos tonight
trying to capture lightning

four of them have lightning on them
sky is pink in every photo
not what the naked eye saw
I guess lighting is too fast to see too...

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I am the ocean, wet and mysterious
Mercurial, flexible, changeable, a chameleon
People cannot outguess me
My imagination follows a jet stream

I am a kaleidescope of colors,
orange, red, green, yellow, blue, violet, indigo
You cannot catch me; I am invincible and confident
I can barely keep up with myself

I am a tree hugger, a child lover
I am a cartoonist, painter, poet, story teller
I am hopeful and optimistic
I am an egg, sunny side up....

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if your partner has to be mollified and pacified
If he pouts and makes fun of you unless you out-guess him
If being around him makes you feel like you are tiptoeing around glass
If you spend your days trying to outguess his angry moods

If you have been isolated from your family and friends

If everything you do or say has to be careful and deliberate
in order to not receive his wrath, and his disdain
know that you can do better.
And you should....

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Great Aunt Maude had a bejeweled flair
With red and blue rhinestones in her hair
Black fluffy coat resembling grizzly bear
We could never outguess what she would wear

Her glitzy outfits were worn with care
Silver sequined gowns, shoulders often bare
She entices old men on the town square
All could easily be lured to her lair.

Other ensembles could never compare
Her collars glistening with fluffy hare
Other women enjoy newest cookware
Great Aunt Maude dressed exotic as Cher...

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She has not bathed for a week or two
Those pajamas have been on her at least six days
She complains of aches and pains
Moaning she has no friends
Listless, lifeless, and lethargic
Her parents are beyond worried

There is a knock on the door
A friend enters
“Let’s go party!”
Their sloth of a daughter turns into a carnival ride
Leaves twenty minutes later bursting with energy
Wearing a sequin dress, high heels, combed hair and lipstick
You cannot outguess a fifteen-year-old daughter...

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