Rustler Poems | Examples


Hankering

Hermit Hal
hoped that Harlot Sal
had halted
exalted
exertions as a rustler.
His two-way hustler?
Categories: rustler, hope,
Form: Shadorma

Horse Sense

Are gay jockeys fruit of the loom
when riding a race on the course,
and would they need the helping hand
of a leg-up
to get on their high horse?

Would a long-faced horse,
a sourpuss,
not wanting to be a player,
bolt the barn door
or be a neigh-sayer?

If a broke cowboy saddled with a nag,
a dark horse of a different colour
that's *****,
were bent, a crooked rustler,
would he sell you a bum steer?
Categories: rustler, animal, fun, horse, humorous,
Form: Rhyme


Dreamer

“dreamer”


i’m a restless dream rustler
tryin’ to catch what i can’t keep
i’m a fine wine guzzler
who can’t seem to get no sleep

bases loaded and i’m pitchin’
i’m like the bases basically
when i awoke was in the kitchen
drinkin’ coffee in my sleep

i had a lifetime to be lonely
but i chose to keep your company
throw out a lifeline honey
i’m losing the grip on my sanity
Categories: rustler, color,
Form: Rhyme

Premium MemberPersnickety Pete

Cattle rustler’s name - Persnickety Pete
Never rustled, just lured cattle with treats
   For a rustler, a freak
   Pete was a real sneak
If treats didn’t work, he’d pull a cow’s teats
Categories: rustler, animal, humorous,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberThe End of Moron Mick

That old cattle rustler, called Moron Mick
boasted about his thefts near Sheriff Nick
A noon shootout was planned
Nick had the faster hand
Moron Mick was a boneheaded dipstick


May 6, 2022
High Noon Poetry Contest
Hosted by Joseph May
Categories: rustler, conflict,
Form: Limerick


Rustler

We hung a rustler in San Francisco
Orneriest cuss you ever could know
He cursed us with a rave
He would haunt us from the grave
So we buried him in New Mexico

11-23-20
Contest : Make Me Laugh With Some Humor
Sponsor : Tania Kitchin
Categories: rustler, humorous,
Form: Limerick

Waiting For the Plague To Pass

I know not when we shall shake hands again
Or hold in warm embrace for the sheer joy 
Of each sunrise and moonlight
For the plague and news of frightful deaths
In faraway lands 
Have erected monuments of fear in our hearts
This scourge knows not the old or one with gold
It has made unsure the prophesies of seers
Who did not foretell its emergence from the East
Though bearers of the Rod of Asclepius have 
Responded with their art 
Each day is made uncertain 
With sirens announcing the next patient for isolation
And the morticians awaiting the next carcass
Of the mighty and the lowly levelled by the plague
The king’s men and town criers have told of 
The enormous chains at city gates 
They have forbidden us to act as free men
But a woeful lot propelled by raw ignorance 
Have defied the king’s edict and 
Like stray goats tempting a rustler 
They dare the plague to come nigh
Our store houses have grown lean
And Like a century ago 
None from this can flee except 
God shows mercy
Categories: rustler, anxiety, bereavement, depression, fear,
Form: Free verse

Dreamer

I'm a restless dream rustler
Tryin to catch what I can't keep
I'm a fine wine guzzler
Who can't seem to get no sleep

Bases loaded and I'm pitchin
I'm like the bases basically
When I awoke was in the kitchen
Drinkin coffee in my sleep

I had a lifetime to be lonely
But I chose to keep your company
Throw out a lifeline honey
I'm losing the grip on my sanity

*lyrics written for the Denim Dirt Farmers 
unpublished cassette: "A Lifetime" ©1996
Categories: rustler, muse,
Form: Lyric

Stable Boy

He stumbled up the rock slope
To find the breaded man.
A six gun waiting at the ready,
The bastard’s flesh to brand.
A rock came loose
His foe came round
A stray bullet 
Struck in the group
He could not believe his good luck,
His vengeance was at hand.

The race was on around the ridge
He chased that rustler scum
Until atop a stony knoll
He aimed his heavy gun
The shot rang out
The foe went down
The echo washed
Over the town
He stood over the silent corpse
Tired, raw, and stunned

He trudged his way back to the town
Finding faces froze in shock
The though that he might win the day
Their minds had wholly blocked
He gave a shrug
And walked on by
To Red’ Saloon
And Lorelei
He cared not what her job might be
He’d ask her, ready or not

She saw him coming down the hall
And wept their at his feet
Then led him back into her room
For things I can’t repeat
The stable boy
His pa avenged
When none would
Step up to defend
And claimed a wife all on the day
Fellows, that’s no mean feat
Categories: rustler, adventure, conflict, hero, history,
Form: Cowboy Poetry

Rustler of Graves

Translation,
  the executioner of emotion,
  —and rustler of graves

(Chicago Illinois: Water Tower with Studs Terkel—July, 1977)
Categories: rustler, language,
Form: Free verse

Premium MemberThe Kid and the Census Taker

It appears that Billy, the Kid had some fun with a census taker
during that period when the Kid was a cattle rustler.
On the application where it states what one does for a living
the Kid jotted down "cattle managing."
Categories: rustler, cowboy-western, history,
Form: Rhyme

Words To a Plant

How have you been,
Greensleeves.
You've had water, old Barkfingers,
Good soil around your roots,
well-potted, Sun-Reacher.

Time, blush, to flower
maybe seeds, huh?
I'll bring a butterfly
or a bee, Twig-Rustler

This spring, I'll see to it
that you have a nest,
not a robin's nest,
built in a week, a throw-away.
Oh no, an oriole's nest,
that marvel of a purse they weave.
I'll get you one, if I have to go
without theater tickets, 
or give up ice-cream like for Lent.
A guy  needs a friend.
and, Plant, with your second flower,
if it comes, I'll make tea
a superb infusion to drink
with crackers from London
with cheese from Finland
and open the window.
Categories: rustler, caregiving, friendship, sympathy,
Form: Free verse
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