The Great California Quake of 2024
Disasters have plagued our planet since the dawn of time
When primitive creatures rose from primordial slime
And a comet came down to hit a dinosaur’s head,
Causing a headache so bad, he was better off dead.
So, he asked the plain question, “to be or not to be?”
And invented Tylenol with codeine, number three.
Before you know it, Mount Vesuvius exploded,
And many kilometers of magma unloaded.
Thousands were inundated - a woeful loss of life,
One man frozen stiff forever with his neighbor’s wife.
The Chicago Fire was equally terrible.
To be cooked alive is certainly unbearable.
As disasters go, this undoubtedly qualifies.
Mrs. O’Leary’s cow did publicly apologize.
When the South Fork Dam breached, to people’s worst fears,
The Johnstown Flood immersed folks here and there to their ears.
If you happened to be shorter than five foot-seven,
You saw a few fish, and then you went up to heaven.
This holiday season, some fun you may wish to poke
At me, as you might Scrooge or Grinch, but this ain’t no joke.
Prepare for a worse catastrophe, never seen before,
One you can’t ignore, which will knock you right to the floor,
Let me underscore, get ready, there’s food to store…for
The Great California Quake of Twenty-Twenty Four.
Copyright ©
David Crandall
|