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Sneezing fit tests nasal septum

Sneezing fit – tests nasal septum

The word Gesundheit was first used in English in 1914. It became popular in the United States due to the many German immigrants who moved there. Many Americans may not be aware that Gesundheit is a German word, or even what it means.

Contrary ro popular belief, I experience sneezing fits
every now and again (like right nah... nah... mah now, 
but cannot attribute sternutation linkedin to any known allergens).

An infinitesimal slight speck tickled nostril follicle – activated 
via an itty bitty, nitty gritty dirt band noah bigger than a mole 
luck yule set in motion a chain reaction, whence mine sensitive 
proboscis honker (a wheeze hilly little bridged fine tuned pug 
nose aroma sensor), got unexpectedly in gauged (in holy matt 
trim mo’ knee) to achew, and eschew pledging troth (in favor 
of hanky-panky) found this chap feeling phlegmatic despite 
an endless strings of faux allergic emanations, which upon 
subsiding left me throat rather raspy and voice some octaves 
deeper akin to a coterie of celebrated jumping frogs from 
Calaveras County, California took residence and took leave 
sans stranglehold upon math rote upon awakening from a 
hard day’s journey into night across the outer limits of thine 
twilight zone resurrected during slumber, yet upon awake
kin ning felt much refreshed and hungry enough to eat a horse
 – nee – make that forced whore – gulped down within a hoof 
n hour and now recount how back in the day when zooming 
thru the Lilies of the Valley (whooshing mass elf tubby an aero
plane) frequent bouts with uber twittering snapchatting sinus 
attacks besieged crinkled, doppelganger expeller for germs 
hunting with his clean X instantaneously for nasal passages 
to enter surreptitiously the fecund effluvia dripping, oozing, 
and  seeping clear liquid as wintry cold air looses droplets 
from out a near frozen nose, which bloke knows not why 
frigid blast stimulates a gallimaufry of sniffling to spurt into 
a volume of one after another gesundheit snorting trumpeting 
unwittingly confusing Canadian geese, who misconstrue the 
honking from midway centered facial organ, which angry 
birds in tandem with flock of Seagulls quite perturbed to 
espy one curmudgeon chap clapping hands over (what feels 
like a smashed face) in an effort to stifle subsequent gummy 
emissions, which residue expectorated with heaven hoe. 
This thick mucous essentially the defense mechanism of 
a healthy body electric to restore biz zee nose as usual, 
which for this mild mannered liberal leitmotif from the 
chronicle of one matted nattering nabob of nativity attests 
congested mob functioning like a well lubricated machine, 
et for the life of me, nary a handy dandy blues clues evident 
as per, how the human entity empowered to steamroll over 
any reasonably annoying bugaboo. Ah, now if only a similar 
innate defense mechanism arose within the mental health, 
that would be a supreme testament to thine atheistic exist
ants of miracles minus the attendant pharmacopeia of this, 
that or some other drug to aright skewered psyche (of this 
contemplative, emotive and intuitive literate outlier), 
whose fifty plus eight shades of gray matter went awry 
and skewed toward tipping point (to cope with ordinary 
cares and concerns of an uncertain whirled wide web) 
found the bulk of his life riddled with a joe king, gun 
slinging tub back ha chew win, bard arse wordsmith, 
who doth newt like to utter any crossword.

Copyright © Matthew Harris

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