Certainly. There's lotsa stuff
that's no more.
Certainty, like death, is forever.
Change stops when you're dead.
Change does just that, keeps changing.
You can give up smoking
yet you can't give up changing.
Gave up smokin' fifty years ago.
Cigarettes, ash trays, things of my past.
There's something about ashes
everyone eventually ends up there.
Many of us make ashes of ourselves.
These Ifs surely can get ya.
And those Ands keep comin'.
But the Butts
no more for me.
Funny how this works.
Certainty, good riddance.
No Ifs Ands or Butts.
19 Lines Free Verse 93 Words October 2022
Pen illustration G. Gaul
An A.P.* who was filling in
To read aloud on Zoom
Just grabbed a book his own kids faved
And thereby met his doom.
The second graders loved it
But it didn’t make the cut
With his boss, because the title talked
Of needing a new butt.
The humor’s aimed at children
And describes, in certain parts,
The different types of derrieres
And also talks of farts.
Reluctant readers sometimes need
Such talk to be inspired
But still, the one who read it
Found out he had gotten fired.
This happened while America
Was celebrating reading
And surely censorship like this
Is not what kids are needing.
*Assistant principal
Life should never include ifs, ands, or butts
Especially the butts, they're made for those who lust
There's something about anuses
Attached to gorgeous waitresses
Maintain your composure, remain calm you must
Some days are diamond, some days are diamonds
Hey wait! Somethings wrong, each man is an island
What's good for some
Some fall on their bum
For me, it's diamonds, no ifs, ands, or hyphens
(Hyphens? Well it sorta rhymes doesn't it!!!)
Some days are diamonds, some days are diamonds
Hey wait! Somethings wrong, each man is an island
What's good for some
Some fall on their bum
For me, it's diamonds, no ifs, ands, or hyphens
© Jack Ellison 2015
(Hyphens? Well it sorta rhymes doesn't it!!!)
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