In my many years before the mast
I’d seen rocks and shoals conspire
To ground me down to powder
Till I was just dust in the wind,
And I’d never even been to Kansas.
I was useless as a one-armed paper hanger,
Skilled in the geometer’s art,
But no closer to infinity
Than the day I’d started out.
Just a journeyman aesthete
Dressing drywall plaster
With those tapestried patterns
Favored by the rich and famous.
But, being a lifelong learner,
I learned to breathe.
I learned to eat.
I learned to say, “No.”
I became a student of the universe,
Composer of the mini-verse,
Somewhere to the left of Earth.
Mainlining the vagus nerve
On the highway leading home.
And there’s no place like home.
I must be doin’ somethin’ right.
Categories:
mainlining, allegory,
Form: Blank verse
I woke up and toked,
wrapped up the little jokes,
and led the flow of traffic on down the road...
I'm not Casper but I sher Boo the mood of plaster,
I'd rather stiff at narks to break cards,
with hard farce,
never gettin' pulled over by the words-
...wait in giant leaps,
I can see the next comin' just down the street!
If it was company I'd meet,
but since they're strangers I creep,
wait in song and sing lead!
You lead!
I am a man,
I am looking at the disease!
Wasted on my knees,
I can wait for eternities,
never caring about the breeze,
the cold shoulder,
or the person that stinks-
its all just a place-
a disastrous phase-
earning loads of lore and lies,
mainlining out of personalities,
so come up and peek,
it could only hurt a little cheek,
why wreck the day when there is cause to play?
Categories:
mainlining, devotion, faith, hope, inspirational,
Form: Imagism
We are not from Scottish Power,
or even British Gas.
We wouldn’t drag you
out of the shower
for anything less than
God. And just to let you know
how to achieve Eternal Life…
We are nothing like
the religious group
who called on you last night.
There is one major difference:
They are wrong, and we are right.
Certain substances must be avoided
like heroin and cups of tea.
Is it worthwhile mainlining –
or enjoying Typhoo or PG –
if, because of that, you cannot live
with God eternally?
You can stuff your face with chocolate, crisps –
and Diet Coke is not outlawed.
You can even have some Red Bull
to wash down all that chocolate,
if you’re getting very bored.
You need to be baptised, and soon.
Your last one doesn’t count:
insufficient water, and you were too young.
What about the Baptist Church?
You’re being awkward now.
Okay, let’s cut straight to the chase.
No other church has authority
from God. We do.
Categories:
mainlining, faith, funny, religion, satire,
Form: Free verse