When daddy comes to see me, it feels wrong.
It only happens when I’m in his flat,
each second weekend. “Luka” was the song
my mother sang. But “Where I Hang My Hat”
is what he likes. The day they got divorced,
he told me that he loved me most of all.
Her boyfriend’s nice. His name is ‘Horst’:
(he’s German). Daddy says, Horst isn’t tall.
Jera
Aku terus berjalan dibelakangmu
Yang tampak hanya punggungmu
Inginku merengkuhmu tapi ku tak mampu, kasihku
Inginku menyapamu namun ku tak sanggup, cintaku
Haruskah hasratku terpenuhi hanya dengan pandangi punggungmu?
Aku sangat ingin menatap wajahmu
Terengkuh kedalam peluk dadamu
Namun ku takut
Karena jeraku pada gagal
Karena jeraku pada luka
Duka karena cinta
Maaf kasih, kuhanya kan sapa punggungmu…
Discouraged
I keep on walking behind you
Your back is all I eye-sense, very true
I’d like to reach you in my stalking, darling
I want to say hi but it’s stopped in cries, honey
Should my passion be fulfilled,
Only by seeing your back in wilt?
I’m dying to see your face,
Got reached into your warmth
But I’m too afraid to embrace
Cos my discouraged hasn't been calmed
Cos my scared of scratched heart,
Of my past mourning love
I’m sorry for me, can never go onward
The dearest, only your back can see my love dove
Cermin
Kupandangi cermin didepan berdiriku
Akankah bayangan itu berubah?
Mungkinkah bayangan itu memudar?
Bayangan itu senyata nafasku
Bayangan itu sepasti lukaku
Semakin dalam dukaku saat melihatmu
Cermin fana pengungkap dusta
Sembunyikanlah nyatamu
Aku malu dan pilu
Pudarkanlah bayangmu
Aku luka dan berduka
Retakkanlah wujudmu!
Aku ingin melupakannya
Bayang semu diriku
Bayang semu senyata dustaku
Bayang semu senyata dosaku
Mirror
(23/07/2011)
I stare at the mirror in front of my stand
Would my reflection change?
Is there any slightest possibility it will be faded?
This reflection as real as my breath
This reflection as precise as my sad,
And it gets deeper when I see you,
The disguise revealing mirror makes me blue
Please, hide me your reality
I’m embarrassed and no clue
Fade me my reflection
I’m wounded and escaped from truth
Break me yourself, I’m begging you!
I want to break me,
My reflection in disguise,
The disguised me in falsity
My disguised me needs clarity!
Kedai usang di tepi jalan
lambang kasih bonda
tanda keringat perit ayahanda
pun sepi di tepi jalan
tiada pelanggan
tiada lagi suara penuh mesra
tiada lagi pesanan ke udara
tiada lagi apa - apa
pun lena ditelan kenangan
kisah cinta dan kasih
bonda dan ayahanda
yang penuh pedih, luka dan duka